Wednesday, September 14, 2005

   Short Comic: Meta Lawsuit
(Meanwhile, somewhere in deep space, Meta Ridley is creating major chaos on some planet)

Samus: *After running into the town Ridley was destroying* Freeze Ridley!
Ridley: (Looks at her with a cold stare) Bite My Shiny Metal Tail!
Bender: (Appears out of nowhere) Hey! You stole my lines!
Ridley: So?
Samus: �
Bender: Your using a copyrighted phrase that only I can say!

Ridley: (Looks at him with an uninterested look) Like I care? I can say and do what ever I want! So sue me!

Bender: Then I shall! See your Tail in court! (Disappears)
Samus: Now you�ve done it� You don�t realize what you just gotten yourself into.
Ridley: *anime veins* Shuddaaaap! (Flies off)

(The next day in the courtroom somewhere on Earth)

Policeman: Court case #19,678 Ridley vs. Futurama

Judge: (After looking at the large Metallic dragon and raises an eyebrow) Isn�t that �no pets allowed in courtroom� law still in effect?

Policeman: Uh� Your honor, the dragon is the defendant.
Judge: Oh� (Looks even closer) Is that thing even real?
Ridley: *Anime veins* What do you think I am!? Some sort of metallic prop!?
Judge and Samus: �
Judge: Anyway� Mr. Ridley, how do you plead?
Ridley: Innocent but hungry!
Judge: (Rolls eyes and then looks to Bender) Mr. Bender, please state your case.

Bender: Your honor, as you know, I have copyrighted many phrases. Stating in each copyright I pacifically stated that no one is to use those words unless I allow them to.

Zebesian Lawyer: OBJECTION!
Judge: Overruled�

Bender: As I was saying, no one is allowed to use those phrases without my permission. And this fool (Points to Ridley) used it without my permission.

Ridley: (Growls loudly) Why you impudent little pipsqueak! At least I know how to say stuff without making it vulgar like you do, Bender!

Bender: Can it metal mouth!
Ridley: Make me!
Judge: (Slams on podium with mallet a few times) Compose yourself Ridley!

Ridley: I�m wasting my time here! Just because of some stupid phrase? Please! People use copyright words and phrases all the time and they don�t get sued!

Lela: That�s because they are allowed to.

Ridley: �And I�m not!? How low is that!? I mean come on! For the last couple of years I�ve been getting sued for stupid stuff. But for saying a blasted copyrighted phrase!? This is just down right trifling!

Bender: You know what's trifling?
Ridley: Say it and I'll make you sing folk songs infront of everyone in the courtroom.
Bender: On second thought...

(Bickering starts in the courtroom)

Judge: (Slams on podium with mallet a few times) Order! Order in the courtroom! *Sigh* Court will be resumed 20 minutes from now. Dismissed.

With that, the judge gets up and goes into the back room.

Ridley: (Motions the 'off with your head' gesture to Bender)

Bender: (In sign language) Watch what you gesture fool, you may get sued by someone else following this lawsuit. Hehe! Hehe!

Ridley: *Anime Veins*

(20 minutes later)

Judge: Has the Jury reached a verdict?
Someone in the Jury: Yes, we find the defendant, Meta Ridley, guilty but still hungry.

Ridley: You read my mind� Hmm� I think jury shish-ca-bob sounds like something that would fill me up.

Same person in the jury: Uh� on second thought, Innocent but hungry.
Bender: Oh please! You�re all afraid of a big overgrown lizard? You wusses!
Ridley: Watch it Bender or I�ll use you for a toothpick after my next meal.
Bender: �

Judge: (Slams on podium with mallet a few times) ENOUGH! Get this overgrown lizard out of my courtroom before I send him to the state prison!

Samus: Even if you did, he�ll break out.
Judge: Maximum security then!
Samus: You don�t have the technology to keep him locked him up.
Judge: Who are you to say that we don�t?
Samus: I�m a bounty hunter whose been tracking this dragon for years.
Judge: � Whatever� Just get him out of the courtroom.

Samus: With pleasure� (Charges up her Ice Beam, shoots it at Ridley, freezing him from head to toe)

(Hours later on Brinstar)

Samus: *After nailing Ridley with one of her missiles* So, have you learned your lesson, Ridley, not to steal other people�s lines?

Ridley: �
Samus: Well?
Ridley: Yeah, Whatever!

Man with black shades, having a big crazy hairdo, wearing a black shirt and blue pants: Hey bub! You stole my lines!

Ridley: *Roars and then engulfs the guy* Mmmm� Tastes like chicken. *Throws up a mangled pair of cracked shades*

Samus: (Nails Ridley with a fully charged energy blast at point blank, sending him off into the stars) Tsk Tsk� He�ll never learn.

(Meanwhile, Back on Earth)

Fry: So, feel better, Bender, since you got all that money from Ridley?

Bender: Ah... It was worth it. More importantly, I got something he wish he never lost... *Pulls out a debit card labelled 'Zebesian Master Card'* Hehehehehe!

Lela: Bender! You didn't!

Bender: Ya! So? Hmm... I wonder how much the dragon has in his acount... *Goes outside and sticks the card into an ATM machine*

Suddenly the total amount of 5 trillion dollars pop up on the screen.

Bender: Oh yeah! I'm rich! In your face Meta! *presses the 'drain account' option* Hello life of luxury!

(Meanwhile, back at the hotel)

Meta Ridley is at an ATM machine with a Zebesian Visa. He then puts in and tries to withdraw money and gets an 'no money in account' message.

Ridley: What the... BEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEERRRRRRR!!!!!!
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