Wednesday, December 8, 2004

cool
-Chapter One-

-Setting: Yu Yu Gang near a bus stop-

?No.? Hiei said bluntly when Kurama tried to persuade Hiei to join him, Yusuke, and Kuwabara on a trip to a long away farm. Yusuke and Kuwabara were too scared to ask Hiei.

A sly, almost smirk, appeared on Kurama?s face. Hiei didn?t like that. Kurama then held his hand out from behind his back. THERE WAS HIEI?S PRECIOUS KATANA!!!

Hiei disappeared in a flash at an attempt to snatch his Katana away from Kurama. But when he re-appeared, Kurama still had the Katana firmly in his grip. Hiei blinked, then pulled, Kurama pulled back, Hiei pulled again?

It soon became a tug-of-war, Hiei losing badly due to the fact that Kurama was several inches taller then him.

Kurama finally got the Katana out of Hiei?s grasp and ran onto the bus that was to take them to the farm. Hiei quickly followed, not realizing that he was getting on a bus that would lead to his DOOM? Just kidding, it only leads to his complete insanity. Yusuke and Kuwabara ran onto the bus after him.

Kurama sat in the vary back, therefore, Hiei, Yusuke and Kuwabara also sat in the vary back. From here, they could see everything? Even some things they didn?t want to see.

Hiei was still trying to get his Katana away from Kurama when the bus started moving. When it was going at a good speed, Kurama let Hiei have his Katana back. Hiei growled at Kurama as he put his Katana back in its place.

Hiei noticed everything on the bus. It was full of mostly young adults and teens, though there appeared to be a set of 6 or 7 year old twins, and an ancient looking man. The twins were playing with a oddly familiar looking little red ball, while the old man looked like he was enjoying listening to some non-existing music, slowly rocking his head from side to side.

It had only been about 5 or 10 minutes since the bus had started moving, when it slowed down and stopped at a gas station, near a mental institution. The bus driver announced a ?cough- bathroom break, before he got off the bus and headed into the gas station. Half the bus, including Yusuke and Kurama got up and followed him, though they didn?t go into the bathrooms.

Kuwabara, who had seemed to be ?thinking? for the whole bus ride all of the sudden broke out in song, ?99 Bottles of beer on the wall!? Hiei finished the song for him in a dull talk tone, ?99 Baka heads on their shoulders! Rip one apart, slice the other 98, 0 Baka heads on their shoulders!? Kuwabara looked impressed. ?Hiei! You never told me you were musically talented!? Hiei growled at Kuwabara and hit him over the head.

The bus started moving again. The driver must have come back in when Hiei was distracted.

All of the sudden the little kids began to giggle and laugh about something. Soon Kuwabara started chuckling lightly for no reason. Hiei glared at all of them, there was something strange here.

He walked up to the front of the bus to talk to the driver. Hiei saw something he didn?t expect to see. The driver wasn?t the driver that the driver used to be! That is, this driver was a girl and the other one was a guy. Hiei also noticed that she was wearing a white mental institution coat and driving at the same time? How? Hiei didn?t know. All of the sudden he remembered her face. It was Mana!!!

?WHAT THE #$!?!? Hiei?Err?Bleeped.

Mana gasped. ?NAUGHTY BOY! BAD BLEEPER! NO BLEEPY BLEEPING BLEEPA BLEEPERS!? she screamed. Hiei stared blankly.

It was then that he realized that the vents were on. He took a calming breath? Big mistake. Suddenly images?Memories, started flashing thru Hiei?s mind. ?Flash- He was struggling with a little ball. -Flash- He threw Mr. Ball at Mana. ?Flash- He was?Oh wait, that was just the sun? ?Flash- Mana was pelting him with balls. ?Flash- Mana was laughing like a maniac while the cops were arresting him.

Mana was laughing evilly again and she somehow magically had taken her coat off. ?The laughing gas is working perfectly! You remember, don?t you Hiei??

Hiei blinked at her. ?What plan? Why laughing gas? How do you know my name!?! Fluffy pink bunnies scare me!!!?

Mana looked like she was about to burst from laughing. ?The plan I planned when I planned to escape after I planned my plan to plan that plan for this plan which is the plan of taking everyone to Lala Land!!! And I don?t know and I looked it up in the phonebook and WHERE!?!? Mana ducked behind her seat.

?Right Here!!!? All of the sudden a teenager came running up to Hiei and Mana with a fluffy pink bunny puppet.

Hiei gasped and hid behind another seat.

Mana jumped back up, leaving her drivers seat in order to shake a rubber chicken in the teens face. ?NOW FACE THE WRATH OF TEH CLAM O? TEH EBIL GUPPEH CLAM O? DOOMNESS!!!? Mana screamed.

The puppet was whacked out of the teenager?s hand by the rubber chicken. ?Thank you! You freed me!? The teen said, hugging Mana. Mana squawked and fell over.

?Hey Mana? Mind if I ask you something?? Mana shook her head.

?Nope. I was gonna ask myself the same thing anyway, Jo Jo.?

?Alright, then who?s driving?? Jo Jo asked.

Mana?s eyes went wide. ?Oh no! I left the stove on!? Mana and Jo Jo jumped back up to see who was driving.

There, sitting in the drivers seat, was the old man? Still bobbing his head from side to side.

This time Hiei jumped up. He then started shouting and running in circles, ?HE?S DEAD! SOMEONE CALL THE AMBULANCE! OR THE POLICE! OR THE VET! OR THE DOG CATCHERS! OR WAL-MART! OR MCDONALDS! I?M HUNGRY!?

The old man slowly turned his head to look at Hiei. He stared at him for a second then his eyes went wide? Then he pounced on Hiei.

Mana and Jo Jo stared at the old man and Hiei struggling, and then shrugged and Mana took the drivers seat again.

?Nice to meet you Hungry? I?m The Old Man? Call me Tom.? Tom said, still trying to pin Hiei down. ?Tell me, did you steal my buddy, Mr. Ball?? Tom asked Hiei.

Hiei shook his head vigorously then looked as though he might just cry. ?No, he was my buddy too! He?s?He?s?He?s? Hiei was choking on the last word? Actually it was Tom strangling him?

?He?s dead!? Hiei shouted. Tom looked as though he also might cry.

?Who did it?!? He demanded. Hiei pointed at Mana as Jo Jo was singing ?it?s a small world? to herself in the background.

?We must avenge poor Mr. Ball!? Tom shouted as he shook his cane in outrage.

Hiei, who had been half distracted by Jo Jo, began singing along with her--Only with different lyrics. ?Oh, lets avenge our Mr. Ball! He?s the greatest ball of all! He?s the smallest ball of all! He?s a small, small, ball!? He sang it like Josh Grodan. (A.N: FYI, to all who don?t know who Josh Grodan is, he?s a opera/pop (Or so my sister says) singer. He sung ?I want to spend my lifetime loving you.? you know? For ?The mask of Zorro.? In other words, he has a deep voice? -.-)

Tom stopped looking outraged long enough to hear Hiei and Jo Jo and bob his head even further side to side.

Hiei quickly looked around for something to hit Mana on top of the head with. Then he saw? ?MR. BALL!?!? Hiei shouted at the little ball that the twins had been previously playing with.

??!!!!!!!!!? Mr. Ball ?Ehem- Jr. shouted at Hiei. ????!!!? Mr. Ball Jr. continued.

?You heard him!? Tom suddenly whispered in Hiei?s ear, so Mana wouldn?t hear. ?Lets let HIM avenge his father!?

Hiei and Tom nodded to each other, the twins seeing this, copied them. Hiei and Tom stared at them. The twins stared back. Tom scratched his head. The twins scratched their heads. Hiei continued to stare. Then Tom said, ?Simon says touch your toes?? The twins did nothing. Then Hiei tickled Tom a little. One of the twins tickled the other, then the other tickled? the? Other? Anywho, they ended up in a heap of laughter.

Hiei and Tom nodded to each other again, and then Hiei whispered, ?On three.? He picked up Mr. Ball Jr. and turned to Mana and Jo Jo.

?One?? Hiei said.

?Six?? Tom said.

?Fivety five?? Hiei said.

?Twentyteen?? Tom Said

?THREE!? They both shouted.

Hiei threw Mr. Ball Jr. at Mana. Unfortunately, he hit Jo Jo instead.

Jo Jo rubbed her head and picked up Mr. Ball Jr. then looked at Hiei and Tom. ?What was that for?? She asked.

Hiei and Tom quickly pointed at Mana who was whistling and driving with her eyes closed.

Jo Jo growled and threw Mr. Ball Jr. at Mana, hitting her square in the head. ?HEY!? Mana shouted at Jo Jo, ?What was THAT for??

Jo Jo pointed at Hiei and Tom.

Hiei and Tom grew BIG sweat drops and just stood there, trying to look innocent.

Mana stared at them, then shrugged and threw Mr. Ball Jr. over her shoulder? And out the window.

Hiei and Tom looked mortified. ?NOOOOO!!!? They screamed and ran to a window, sticking their faces to it like bugs on a windshield.

?WHY! OH, WHY!? Hiei shouted at no oneness.

?For plot purposes and more laughs.? Mana said simply.

The sky began to darken for some odd reason. Black clouds were slowly creeping in on them and the wind picked up drastically.

?Oh! Look! Look! It?s a kitty!!!? Jo Jo said, jumping up and down and squealing. She was pointing at the road also.

Mana squinted to see what Jo Jo was pointing at. As the bus drew closer, the thing became clearer.

Jo Jo suddenly got a wide-eyed expression and fell backwards, landing on her rump. ?THAT is NOT a kitty!? She screeched.

Hiei and Tom came over to look at it.

?A duck?? Hiei guessed.

?A Heffalump?? Tom suggested. Everyone stared at him like he was missing a few marbles?Which he was?Then they all nodded in agreement.

?Could be.? Mana said.

Then she got a good look at it. ?But Its worse! IT?S A COW!? She shouted.

?MOOOOOO!? Said the cow? And Jo Jo.

Everyone in the bus screamed! (A.N: Duh. -.-)

Mana veered to the left, narrowly missing the cow.

The bus fell down the side of the road, the side with trees all over it.

The bus hit a bunch of the trees and magically ended up breaking open a bunch of laughing gas containers.

?Oh no! Too much!? Mana laughed and the whole bus began laughing hysterically before ?Whiting Out? and crashing at the bottom.

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