current time: 12:32
current song: none
current thought: people are so confusing
Anybody here ever thought that they, maybe just for a day, wanted to go somewhere away from every other human being on the planet. yeh.
I've got quite a few thoughts swarming through my mind, that i'm not really sure how to solve. Too many riddles with no answer.
I went bowling last night. I was a chaperone for my younger sister and her friends. One of my closet frinds, Ginny came. And my long time friend, and ex boyfriend, Ramiro came. Well to make a long story short, RAmiro has liked me for a long time, we broke up (rather i broke up wit him) maybe a year and a half ago... something like that. But last night, i decided that i still liked him. So, technically we are dating again. (Though he has to ask my father first...XD)
The bad thing about all this is, as soon as i said that i wanted to go back out... i wish i hadn't. I"m scared. I"m scared of relationships... i don't like them. But i felt like i was being pushed towards him...for awhile. Whatever that means...
And now...i don't know. I think about these things way too much.
I'm not quite sure what to do. I'm far too sensitive for this stuff...and i tend not to deal with it the way i should.
I"m scared. Not of him...never of him. I have known him too long. But... i don't know. I don't kow what i'm scared of. I guess i'm scared of being tied down to one person. Even though i'm really not. I'm scared, that i've changed too much since we last dated. I'm quieter now...more shy. and i'm just different... i think differently.
*sigh* I apologize refusly for this post, it really isn't important. I just needed to let some thoughts out.
Bou, i love you and can't wait to see your hair. ^_^ *kisses*
~Shin-chan
PS. my hair is now red. XD it used to be dark brown almost black, then i looked like a tiger, then it was like takanori's, now it is Kami Red. My Tribute to the late drummer of malice mizer.
Eternal Rest Kami-sama.
