Tuesday, April 26, 2005

   Hi everyone!!!!!
Finally I'm feeling better! ^_^ In my class is one guy and he is sooo damn good-looking that I could faint. I just don't know what he thinks about me..probably nothing..but I can always hope..! x_x I thin I put some pics...


She looks very dangerous...


Jibrille and Raphael..they are so cute!!! x_x


Kourai..beautiful...


Setsuna...maybe little bit sad...


Well, this is interesting.. ^_^


Setsuna and Rociel..I wonder what Rociel is doing...


Setsu and Sara...they are just sooo cute!!! x_x

Okay there was all from this time!! bye!!! ^_^
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Thursday, April 21, 2005

   *sigh* Hi everyone!
Yesterday didn't go so well..In school I did argue with that my "friend". At first I was really angry but then I couldn't stop my tears..in the end I couldn't think anything else than that I'm too tired to continue this life anymore..it did feel terrible. Luckily it did go over. now I'm still trying to recover from it..I hope that you all have been good days. Well, I hace to go now...so bye!!
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Friday, April 15, 2005

   I'm so stupid!!!
Today I have been sooo stupid..
I came to school too early (first hour did begun 9.20 a.m. and I did come 8.30 a.m.) *sigh* Then this whole school day seems to be sooo long...and when I finally can go home I don't know what I could do..can I be more stupid??? *sigh again* And then everything just feels to be sooo depressing...I just can't cheer up. It's sooo hard..and everything is against me...well, but I guess I go to mourn this everythin to home so see ya!!!
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Monday, April 11, 2005

   I'm feeling fine now...or unleast I think I'm. I did have a great weekend. I were in a concert whith my two friend.
Here is a little poem...unleast I thin it's poem...

Night is coming.
I know that I will cry, again.
Hole night I cry,
can't fall asleep.
When morning comes
I will wipe away my tears.
Then I will go out of my room
and everything will be as it used to be...

So, there it was...and I would be very pleased if you tell me what you think about it...^_^

Well, I hope you all have a good day! x_x
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005

   Lyrics
I put few lyrics here...

Poison

Your cruel device
Your blood, like ice
One look could kill
My pain, your thrill
I want to love you but I better not
Touch (don’t touch)
I want to hold you but my senses
Tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too
Much (too much)
I want to taste you but your lips
Are venomous poison
You’re poison running through my
Veins
You’re poison, I don’t want to
Break these chains
Your mouth, so hot
Your web, I’m caught
Your skin, so wet
Black lace on sweat
I hear you calling and it’s needles
And pins (and pins)
I want to hurt you just to hear you
Screaming my name
Don’t want to touch you but
You’re under my skin (deep in)
I want to kiss you but your lips
Are venomous poison
You’re poison running through my veins
You’re poison, I don’t wanna
Break these chains
Poison
One look could kill
My pain, your thrill
I want to love you but I better not
Touch (don’t touch)
I want to hold you but my senses
Tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too
Much (too much)
I want to taste you but your lips
Are venomous poison
You’re poison running through my
Veins
You’re poison, I don’t wanna
Break these chains
Poison
I want to love you but I better not
Touch (don’t touch)
I want to hold you but my senses
Tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too
Much (too much)
I want to taste you but your lips
Are venomous poison, yeah
I don’t want to break these chains
Poison, oh no
Runnin’ deep inside my veins,
Burnin’ deep inside my veins
It’s poison
I dont’t wanna break these chains
Poison


I just love that song!!!! x_x I relly do...

Nobody’s Listening

Yo. peep the style and the kids checkin for it
The number one question is how could you ignore it
And drop right back in the cut
Over basement tracks with rap sack
Got you back in the sup like rewind that
We just rollin’ with the rhythm
Fast from the ashes of stylist division
We these nonstop lyrics of life livin
Not to be forgotten but still unforgiven
When in the mean time there are those who wanna talk
This and that so what suppose that
It gets to the point to where feelings gotta get hurt
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt
It goes

I tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me
I told I everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don’t want to hear me
I told you everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress, hair full of anger
Hell did my chest
And everything left is waste of time
I hate my rhymes, but hate everyone else’s more
Im riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it’s better I can’t keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave me something to write on
Pain gave me something I could set my sights on
Never forget the blood, sweat and tears
The uphill struggle over years
The fear and the trash talking to the people it was to
And the people that started it just like you.

I tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me
I told I everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don’t want to hear me
I told you everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening
I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress, hair full of anger
Hell did my chest
Uphill stuggle, blood , sweat and tears, nothing to gain
Everything to fear
(repeat)

I tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me
I told I everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don’t want to hear me
I told you everything loud and clear
But nobody’s listening


That is also very, very good song...it tell something about me...


Somewhere I belong

(when this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(inside of me)
But all that they can see the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(nothing to lose)
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

[chorus]
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong

And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(so what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

[repeat chorus]

I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I’ll find myself today

[repeat chorus]

I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong


I like Linkin Park!!!!
Yay, but now I have to go into my own weird world...
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Monday, April 4, 2005

   .......o.O............
Okey, now I'm better than before weekend...I can't still feel anything positive feelings...only everything negative...but it doesn't matter. No one doesn't even notice it because I can fake that I'm happy...I'm doing it always... -.-;;; I know that it's little bit stupid but I can't help it...I really don't...and I'm too tired to even try it... *sigh* Dying would be so easy..but I know that I'm have to keep going on...it is just so hard...
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Thursday, March 31, 2005

   Empty...
Before today I didn't know how it's feel to feel nothing. Today I'm so empty inside...*sigh* And this is not so great...I think I hate this even more than deppression...
Why this all is happening to me?
Damn, why this pain doesn't go away and leave me alone!??! How I hate this!!! hmph..I tell this almost every post....sometimes I feel like I'm stupid...now is one of those days....sometimes I wish that I wouldn't feel anything, but if it would be that way...I wouldn't be here anymore...I'm so pathetic...This could go over if I could cry but there is no tears...*sigh* Guess I can't do anything to this...*sigh again*
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Wednesday, March 30, 2005

   Today Is My Birhtday!!!!!!!!!!!
Yay! So, today is my birthday and I'm 17 years old! That is sooo great! And I'm sssoooo happy today that nothing will deppress me!! x_x Okey I put some pics here...


Sara and Setsuna...They are soooo cute!!!!


Hih...Rociel does have weird hairstyle...^_^


...it is so beautiful picture...


Sara Mudo...


Setsuna Mudo...


Alexiel...she looks weird in that pic...

Well, there were everything from this time! I hope that you all have a good day today!!
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Tuesday, March 29, 2005

   Annoying!!!!!
Okey, it wasn't so bad as I thought it would be..^_^; Tomorrow I have birthday and it's so wrong that it is school day!! That is so annoying! Well, guess I just hope that it goes well..x_x hmph...I'm still little bit deppressed...and I haven't heard anything about michel...xSakurax you know who I mean..that is also annoying!!! How I hate this deppression!! I wish that it would just go away.. but it never go...I know that... *sigh* It's so unfair...guess I'm have to just keep going on... *sigh again*
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Thursday, March 24, 2005

   .......
I'm sooo tired...and when I get home I should clean up mine and my sisters room, because she have birthday party on saturday. *sigh* What is wrong with me!?! I'm deppressed but I don't know what did cause it...How I wish that this deppression would be over but it just won't go away...
*sigh again* How I hate this...

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