Friday, July 30, 2004

My poem to a gothic loser.
I say I am myself,
I say Preppies are lame,
I say that my souls on fire
I say I can’t be tamed.

I look like a mouner,
I act like I am tough,
I also look like a rooster,
With my non- conformist strut.

I listen to hate filed music,
I say that I am insane,
When asked why I am so evil,
I say my parents are to blame.

I have several piercings,
I have a big scar to,
I got my skin inked,
And I wear platform shoes.

I say I love my sex partner,
Even though I am still just a kid,
I lean over to them at night,
And say that was the best we did.

I bitch about politics,
Although I have no control,
I engage in atheist pro debate,
While listening to Korn’s Rock and Roll.

I read a lot about death,
And say I am a great vampire,
Despite the fact that labor,
Always quickly makes me prespire.

I have numerous wrist scars,
Yet I have yet to suceed,
Despite my numerous suicide attempts,
It seems I am just too weak.

I practice arcane arts,
And tell my future by the stars,
I masturbate to pics of elves,
Drawn on Magic Cards.

I shop at the Hot Topic,
I watch Invader Zim,
I have a dozen friends with benefits,
Including Raven, Luna, and Tim.

I laugh in gory movies,
I smoke lots of pot,
I am a shallow gothic loser kid,
And cool is what I am not.

My first and probably only poem. I am worried that maybe it is too long. that, and it doesn't really rhyme to good.
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Thursday, July 29, 2004

Some dickheads I go to school with.
As a small conveinance (and the fact that I have nothing else to write about this evening) I am going to describe some of the shitheads I go school with.
1. Annoying preppy type. Easily the easiest to deal with. They attempt to sound educated, but in the end their attempts at open mindedness end up making them sound stupid and annoying.
2. Gothic ass. Tries to be mysterious and cool and tough, ends up coming across as a middle class twat with no ambition or motivation.
3. Jock dolt. Alot of motivation, but in the wrong place. Is hugely homophobic, and tries to call all nerdy types gay. Yeah, since reading about science and technology is much gayer than patting your sweaty buddies on the ass and having a group shower.
4. Self centered upper class girl. Knows that her dad is rich and will always come to her defense. Thinks that her money can buy her happiness, usually ends up knocked up and miserable for her entire life.
5. Punk rocker dipshit. Thinks that his guitar playing ability makes him unique. In reality, he is dumb and takes all of his originality and thoughts off of MTV and knows it. Easily the biggest dipshit of them all, these losers are permanetly on my shit list.
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Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Quit acting stupid you attention whoring dipshits!
I am sick and tired of practiacally every person I know. From the happy loser prepies who will soon work in cubicles, to the over bearing jocks who will soon work in grocery stores, to the whiny ass gothics who will all work in shit jobs. I remember once seeing a girl walking around showing off her "EMO SELL OUT!" T- Shirt. She was dancing around, "Look guys, don't you wish YOU were an EMO sell out?" to everyone in sight til I asked, do you know what am EMO sell out is? Since she couldn't answer, I consider her dumb. Every fucking day it seems there is some new fad to pour your money and time into to see cool and unique. Whatever happened to just existing? Hell, it is what I do. Here is a small list of fads I have observed in the last year. (Not all are shown)
Wiccanism for the wrong reasons, self mutilation, angst punk rock music, lower back tattoos, all of EMO, renaming oneself something else, multiple piercings, weird elastic band things worn on the wrist, and enviromentalism. Jesus fucking christ! can't you people come up with a real original idea? The next person who I hear say "I'm Rick James, bitch," is getting punched in the face. Come up with your own style you self aware dipshits. Quit sucking originality from other people. Now go fuck yourselves.
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Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Self Help. You people need to be shot.
I was thumbing through the paper this morning when something caught my eye. It was an ad. Not just any ad, it was for a seminar in nearby Tampa about, get this, Firewalking! Intrigued at the probability of a lie, I called the number on the ad. I got a woman who described the procedures of the nightly seminar for me. Glass walking, breaking arrows with one's throat, and the awe inspiring walking on hot coals. Ok, so you pay five hundred dollars to do some basic carnival tricks? Astounding. feel the power. Folks, walking on fire is nothing special. Hell, I'll go do it right now to prove it. Simple fact of the matter is, feet and wood are not good conductors of heat. So as long as you keep your feet moving, you will be fine. Glass walking is easy to. Most of the shards are horizontal, just walk slowly and you will be fine. The arrow to the throat? Well, the arrow is balsa and not sharp, and the part of the throat that you are pressing it on is very elastic. Enough pressure, it snaps. Easy as pie. Now then, you want some real self help, get off your ass and do something with your life. God damn people piss me off. The whole sales pitch of motivational books pisses me off. to go out and buy the damn book, you need to be motivated. If I ever buy a motivational book (highly doubtful) I would return it and demand my money back. Some days, people REALLY piss me off.
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Monday, July 26, 2004

Final Fantasy is KEWL!
Just kidding. It is rare that an entire series sucks. Very rare. You see, for a series to exist, the thing being over created has to be good. Not the case with Final Fantasy. Christ those games blow. I honestly have no idea why people keep playing them. Is it the animations and movies, which are of increduibly high quality? Or is it the predictable plot lines? Maybe the dull and uninspiring characters. Allow me to prove my point. In relation to the last game of the series I played, Ten, I figured that it may be really good thanks to the reviews. The only even remotely cool character is that guy with the big ass sword in the red trench coat. Other characters, a pansy ass who looks like leonarndo DiCaprio, a Jamaican rip off, a preppy bitch who smiles to much, a gothic witch wannabee, some chick with small tits that everyone loves, and a big ball of water that threatens the world. Boring! Even worse are the enviroments, and the bosses. You see, if you look closely, all of the enviroments were stolen from a previous game. And the bosses are all weak and uninspired. For example, THE HORRIBLE CHICKEN THING EATING MONSTER! Damn that was both weak, and introduced so suddenly it may have just as well teleported in there. Even worse are the weapons. Each weapon can be used by one person, and one person alone. Fuck Final Fantasy. And fuck both it's movies.

Help still wanted: No takers for my artwork offer? I know someone must want to take it.
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Sunday, July 25, 2004

Turn down your goddamned speakers.
Why does every single dipshit yahoo have to have his radio turned as loud as it will get? What the fuck is the point of getting speakers that are so damn loud that you can't hear the music? Dammit I hate that. Today I was driving to get some junk, and this fuckwad was next to me, keeping the same pace as me, for the entire damn trip. He had his radio as high as it would go, and I'll bet it was some of that R&B shit that white assholes who think they are hardcore listen to. He was driving this big SUV that I am willing to bet belonged to his mother. He was jamming to his music, bobbing up and down, sunglasses and a cigarette in his mouth. The picture of an idiot. Which is exactly what all those idiots are. Ruining not only their speakers, but their hearing as well. Assholes.
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Saturday, July 24, 2004

A Crash at the Race Track.
See, now I feel bad for that post below because there was a big crash at the racetrack. I feel so bad, instead of being at the track seeing a big car crash, I was here updating this website. Dammit.
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Friday, July 23, 2004

NASCAR. Fast cars for slow minds.
If there is one thing I hate more than Florida, old people, and hippies, it is NASCAR. I hate everything about those rednecks. What a waste of gas. You see there is this NASCAR type track nearby my house. By near I mean just over 8 miles straight. And right now, despite my window being closed, I can hear them. They are like bees with chainsaws and jackhammers. And those rednecks. Motherfucking, cocksucking, piece of dogshit, bottom of the gene pool, sheep banging, sister laying rednecks. I hate them. Their shitty ass country music, those dumbass rebel flags, and I really hate their dancing. All dancing sucks, line and square dancing are even worse than most. Back to NASCAR. What the hell is the point? All you are doing is watching billboards on wheels turn in circles. "WHOOPEE! LOOK MAW! That advertisement for HOOTERS is coming round again. I wonder if my girlfriend will bring home some wings. I hope so, or Paw will tan her hide! She may be working now, but that don't give her the right to disrespect her family!" Damn rednecks. Makes me wonder sometimes, why don't they quit the whole "Dixie" bullshit. I hate that. It has been 100 odd years since you got your asses beat. Quit waving that thing around. "well, it is a symbol of state's rights!" Yeah, right. I am going to walk around with a red star taped to my back. After all, it is just a symbol of a failed ideology.

HELP WANTED: Artist, must be good in paint or photoshop, preferably both. No pay, but some cred and you get to help in a prank. Preferably not wiccan, but if y ou are, this may offend your religious beliefs.
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Vegetarians piss me off.
I had a really weird experience today. I was walking on this big boardwalk in the neighboring town, minding my own business and heading to a bike shop for a piece for my bike, when these assholes on the balcony of this little beach house I was walking past offered me food. Not one to turn down food, I inquired what they were giving. They showed me. Horror was the only thing that came to mind. It was a leaf with some kind of reddish brown goo smeared all over it. After forcing down some vomit, I calmly inquired, my exact words now, what the fuck was that thing? His exact words, "Dude, this is the future of eating. This is a raw food burrito."
"Why the hell would you want a burrito made of lettuce and goo?" I inquired as calmly as I could.
"Well dude, it is really simple. When all we were eating was roots, leaves, fruits, and seeds, all humanity was fine. Then meat and cooked foods came along and now there are people starving everywhere." Cooked foods appeared and now we are dying????? WHAT THE FUCK IS HE TALKING ABOUT!?!?!? Jesus mother fucking god damned christ, I have never heard something so stupid in my entire life. Who are these assholes to say what the fuck is good to eat? Who made them rulers of the universe? The reason there is hunger is because there is a birth rate. You see, there will never be enough food to feed all the people. You see, surplus of food = increased birthrate. More births, more mouths to feed. Simple math. Now one way to ffeed alot more of those mouths is Genetically Engineered food. More yeild from the food. Yet both Vegitarians and Enviromentalists complain about that food. Yeah, that's right. A group of well fed, upper middle class dipshits are bitching about the food that could save millions of lives, just because it has been created artificially, in a way that exactly emulates a natural process. Every time a plant reproduces, it does exactly what genetic manipulation does. Except much faster. I have one thing to say to all vegetarians, enviromentalists, vegans, and other whiney shits. Unless you yourself are in need, you need to, shut, the fuck, up.
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Thursday, July 22, 2004

Who keeps authorizing Olsen Twins Games?
I have a very serious question that portains to the state of manking as we know it. Who the fuck keeps letting them release those godawful Olsen twins games? Girls, in the unlikely event that you are reading this, the only game anyone cares about that involves you two is nude Twister. Look at each of the Olsen games. All of them, without fail, suck. No story, no guns, no nudity, shit, not even a damn cussword. At least say ass. The Olsen's should stick to what they are good at, irritating me with bad acting and shitty songs, but giving me a boner. I am so tired of shitty games being released just because they were based on a kickass movie. The only movie licensed game ever released that kicked ass was "Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay." That game ruled. Sneak up on guards and slice their throats, or shank them in the kidneys. That is a video game. I am also tired of the entire Final Fantasy series. What the hell si the point of that game, and why is it so big? First off, it is repetitive, the combat system is boring, the customizing of characters is gone, and the story is old and lame. Hero is pissed off at evil power. Evil power kicks heroes ass. Hero falls in love. Love and hero discover or are forced to give each other up. Hero kills evil power. Much rejoycing! Turn that shit off, pop in FarCry.
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