Sunday, August 28, 2005

Heavy Element
I recieved this in an e-mail and decided to share it with yall!

It's amazing what science can come up with.
A major research institution has recently announced the
discovery of what is believed to be the heaviest chemical
element yet known to science.

The new element has been named Governmentium.
Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons,
75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called
morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of
lepton-like particles called peons. Since governmentium
has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected
as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
contact. A minute amount of governmentium caused one
reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would
normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 4 years; it
does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization
in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy
neutrons exchange places.

In fact, governmentium mass will actually increase over
time, since each reorganization causes some morons to
become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of
moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that
governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain
quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is
referred to as Critical Morass.

You will know it when you see it.

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