Friday, July 14, 2006

a few quotes I found...
"Love is not finding someone to go to bed with, but finding someone you want to wake up next to in the morning. Love is not finding the perfect person, but finding the imperfect person perfect."
-???

"To the world you are someone, but to someone you are the world."
-???

"Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away."
-???

"You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her."
-???

"If I could be anything in the world, I would want to be a tear so I could be born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips."
-???

"Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away."
-???

"The mind has a thousand eyes, And the heart but one; Yet the light of a whole life dies, When love is done."
-F. W. Bourdillon

"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."
-Kahlil Gibran

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Wednesday, July 12, 2006

okay, so I have a rule list for my site. tell me what you think, honestly. I don't want the m to come off as mean, but then again not too nice. I mean, they're rules. they aren't suposed to be nice, right? anyway, here they are. comment requested.

RULES
1. The Golden Rule applies here. In fact, I live my life by the rule that what goes around comes around, more commonly referred to as Karma. So if you do stupid shit on my page, I'll be sure to return the favor. Just a friendly warning.
2. There is an unspoken rule we Otakuites often view: 'Sign my guest book and I'll sign yours. Add me and I'll do the same.' But I've added a little to that rule. If you sign my guestbook with some crap like 'come sign my guestbook' I won't return the favor. I hate people who do that.
3. Warning! I use vulgar language and swear words OFTEN!!! If you are easily offended, I’m NOT THE FRIEND FOR YOU!!! Please make note of this before going any farther.
4. If you’re not on my friend list, I won't visit your site. Simple as that. It's not that I don't want to meet new people. It's just that I don't make special efforts to find anyone.
5. If you have been inactive for over a month, you can bet that I have deleted you from my friends list. I just have no use for you if you have no use posting once a month. How hard is that? Really? But if something comes up, read the note at the bottom.
6. Asking questions isn’t a bad thing. It’s the only way I find what I’m looking for in stores where I am lost. Seriously. Asking me questions is just as acceptable, but personal things are called personal for a reason, so don’t pester.
7. If I haven’t visited your site, or don’t comment when I do visit, don’t think I’m ignoring you. I just usually get on around midnight, and sometimes I’m too freaking tired to say anything. Nothing personal.
8. As always, have fun, be safe, and as Vash the Stampede would say... ‘Love and PEACE!!!’

NOTE: If you have been deleted from my friend list because of inactivity pm me. Subject: ‘Lost Friend...’ with a legitimate reason for leaving in the body of the pm. It’s just a little something I like to call irreversible control, because if you fail to follow these rules, I will consider further attempts to contact me as declarations of war! Game On Bitch!!


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to explain the exhaustion that has come over me...
I am horrible for doing that to you all, but I'm exhausted because I found something to do with my time this summer. all this week I get to help move half the inventory at a semi trailer repair shop place to one of their garage doors that they have rigged with make-shift shelves. the place is filthy. I literally washed my hands 7 times and still came out filty at the end of the day. and besides that, this shit was heavy to lift too. and on top of all of that, I had to keep it organized. me and organization don't mix well. oh, but I've already typed too much. I'm sorry, but I must now leave you all before I pass out on the keyboard. I'll add more to this story tomorow, and maybe even find time to change my site apearance. won't that be fun? sorry, but this post was kinda pointless for you all to have read, but now you know why I didn't comment like I should have. sorry again!

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Tuesday, July 11, 2006

(revised) a lot of random thought....
well... it certainly was a long time in between my recent daily posts and my last posts like a month or two ago. I really hate having to rebuild my friend list, what with people deleting others who are left vacant for a month, or two whatever your limits are. I've gone through and cleaned out my list as many do... and deleted a few names. I wonder if they will ever come back, like I have. I hope so, or not maybe. guess now I'll never know. but my friends list stayed untouched, so all the friends I had so long ago are still listed... and some of them who are current on otaku and post daily don't seem to remember me. aodtr666 got me started. this was the very first place I got my own web page on, and was proud of it. but then I realized he was a deeply troubled person. he was depressed a lot, and never really opened up out loud. but this site was a way to channel his negativity and put it to at least some use that caused no hamr. and for that, I humbly thank the makers of this entire site. so when I was hit for the first time with depression, one that sent me spiraling downward, and fast, I knew where to turn. you are all quite kind and understandung on this site. it seems that we've all gathered here out of a love for anime or a depression that needed mending. I would now like to thank each and every one of you for your support of one another. I've only now realized that we, together, truely are an extremely large family. one with so many members with so many problems. but there is always soemone else here with the same problem as you, so your not really alone anymore onnce your here. like I said, family. and so, I humbly extend my hand to aid any who feel down, depressed, and alone, hurt, sad, or just like you need to talk to someone. feel free to email me anytime you need to. and don't be embarassed about a thing. I may critisize, but it is out of respect for you for coming forward with your problems to begin with.

sorry about that, it all sounds like a bunch of crap now that it's down, but I'm too lazy to go in and fix it and make it flow, so read it if you please. anyway, I just wanted to let you all know about the creche. it's the banner in my profile above. it is a place for seasoned otaku vets to help out newbies, and newbies to get help around the site. it is also a place for somebody like me, who has been a member for almost a year now, but still cant make my page look good for $H!T. I am curently looking for help, and am soon to be listed as a padawan. it also gives room to post yourself as a master, to help those in need, like myself and many others. it's a totally new feature that otaku cooked up. but don't listen to me ramble on anymore. click the banner and find out for yourself.

again, I would like to ask for anyone who knows scripting to help me, pm me or comment here.

I would also like to remind you if you haven't read it in my profile above that I am cleaning out my friend list. I got rid of all '05 posters, and just the other day got rid of sites dormant since march, including of coarse january and febuary. but in a couple of days I will be purging the list of all not posted since june(april, I meant to say april. I'll leave on the ones that say they've posted anytime in june).

well, I'll let my mind wander here, so I gotta go cause if it gets too far it will get lost. and I gotta tell you, it's too small to make it on it's own. see ya round space cowboy.

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Monday, July 10, 2006

a few random thoughts...
-I could use help revamping my site. the bg is about all that I have, so anyone with any kind of knowledge on scripting or anything actually would be of help right about now. a few topics include: post bg, music(maybe a randomizer of some assortment... or even a basic song on page deal), video posting, scroll bars, imgs, arrow designs, a new avi, and anything else that anyone comes up with really... thanks in advance.

-does anyone know aodtr666 personally? like, talked to him on the phone recently or something? cause he's been away for a while... I live down the street from him and haven't seen him in almost 2 weeks... and I thought we were really good friends... well anyway, if anyone knows what's going on in his life right now I'd sure as hell like to know... thanks in advance for that one as well.

-one last thing before I go... if anyone remembers 2 days ago, what I wrote about the girl... and then yesterday... what the hell should I do? should I try to contact her? or maybe not get involved because of the whole college thing... I really don't know. so any help there would be greatly apreciated as well.

-okay, maybe one last thing. I LIKE PIE! anyone second that?

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Sunday, July 9, 2006

about yesterday...
thank you for your concern, but I think I'll be ok. she's right anyway... she should be focusing on her studies at a time like this anyway. and long distance relationships don't work out in the end (somebody comment and prove me wrong PLEASE). but I'll be alright. and as far as shrinks go, I've never seen one and hope I never do. and the only meds I'll ever take either black me out or numb me entirely. but thanks for the advice anyway blaized. and I think he was right, by the way. depression really does stick with someone for the rest of their lives. oh well. guess I'll just feel like this forever. oh, and good luck with your treatment. hope it all works out for you.

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Saturday, July 8, 2006

I thought I was over my depression. WRONG! I still can't beleive what she said... I was shocked to say the least. I thought I was gonna be sick... maybe even pass out. but oh well, who cares anyway, right? I mean what's stopping me from jumping off of a building or walking out in front of a semi? it just hurts so much. I just wish I would fade away, along with the pain of the loss... the pain of living... and all my troubles just slowly fade out until there's nothing left.

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Tuesday, July 4, 2006

anime-thon
within the last two weeks I sat down and finally watched all of my anime collection. the only complete series that I have seen is Trigun, but I watched Cowboy BeBop, Outlaw Star, and Escaflowne. I have seen tandem episodes of all of these, but watched them all, start to finish. it was amazing.

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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

in follow up of a comment on my last post... it is only worth having an account there if you had trouble putting actual music on you site here. they have a little faq thingy that completely helped me, you know me... completely empty up there XD *knock* *knock* *knock* yup, completely hollow....

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Monday, June 26, 2006

hey all
's been a while... haven't seen you all in so long I'd almost forgotten the way here. but I'm back... still all alone in this world. I got a site on myspace, it's my new website button on the left of my page. anywayz, I hope you all visit me soon. well, that's all I got right now. peace4now

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