Monday, July 23, 2007

alright. i guess nobody is getting the vibes i thought i was sending out. i love you, travis. you are so unbelievably important to me. i actually dont know why u are mad at me and aaron right now, but if it is because we are dating, then im really not sorry.i am happy with him, and no offense, because you and i both know how important u are to me, but aaron is around to make me happy. aaron and me are at the same level. we take the same things seriously, and we help eachother grow and learn and work out life. just like when me and you were together. we helped eachother grow in different ways, and i still hold that very close to my heart. but i cant apologize for being with aaron, if that is infact what u are angry about. so go ahead and be angry, cuz i dont think there is anything i can say to change your mind about that, whatever it is you are angry about. but don't expect it to change my life completely, like it used to when u were angry or upset with me. i have been sad and depressed and bitter about your feelings towards me ever since u walked away from us at the mall, but i am not going to let that change my life again, because you are not the biggest thing in my life anymore. you used to be. i gave up my relationship with my family to try and make u happy ad be with you. you know that. but now you have someone else im sure, and so do i. i am still praying for you and thinking of you often. and by the way, i realy like you little nickname for greg. lol. with the way he has been ever since i met him, i think that that name works pretty well. you still have the ability to make me smile at the worst times.

i am not going to write about the bad stuff happening in my life right now, becaus3e i dont think that tht is important to anyone who reads this. there are a select few that i know would actually want to know, and would care about my answer to their questions, but i also know that they have other ways of reaching me. my dearest kitten, for example, sticks around to hear the answers to the questions he asks me. he is a big part of what good is happening in life that i know about. he is the sweetest young man i have ever known, and for all of you who keep thinking that i am wrong when i say that everything will bve alright, then fuck you, i have proof you ass holes. so, with that last cheerful sentence, i leave you all with fuck you, and leave me alone, because i am miserable, and very few of you know how to make me smile.
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