Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Life goes so quickly...but classes seem so long!!

Hello, minna-san! How are all of you doing? Thank you, thank you for all the comments last time. :) I really appreciate all of them, as usual. <33 So nice to hear from you guys whenever you can manage it. Reki, it's been forever!!! Welcome back! And sparkle, your little pop-in was a joyous occasion as well. Hehe!! ;D Thanks also to SG, Kimberly (new friend?? WELCOME!!!), Anna, pickle, ulter-chan, Icchan, and Yug! It was interesting to read where you guys were during the whole 9/11 tragedy, and thanks for all the sweet words about me feeling better. Indeed, I hope this doctor can help this week...as for those weird allergies of mom and me, well, those have never been figured out. She's been to soooo many different doctors, so who really knows. Just have to suffer with it. Anyhoo, so yes, thanks a lot~~ It's been a while, right? For me at least. XD I didn't get to post this weekend, mostly cause I didn't feel up to it. I didn't think I'd have anything to talk about, and also my head hurt everyday. :/ So like...I just haven't felt well. And I get NO time to do anything during the school week except for today (wednesday) and friday. *listens to Dream Fighter by Perfume, dances quietly to not disturb others in library* Har har!! XD But anyhoo, school sucks. I feel so busy...tuesdays are the worst days ever invented since I have no time in between classes going from 10:10 to 3:40! ;__; And any day that involves that wretched textiles class is heck. When I get home, I'm just so exhausted, and then I usually have more homework to do. The neverending cycle, right?? *rolls eyes* Today's schedule is just as long, but at least I have this 1.5 hour break in between my economics course and ethics!! ^^ I don't know what I'd do without it. *hugs break and the library* I used to have enough time to go to the library almost every day last semester and the one before, but now I only have one day a week. ~_~' So I finally got to talk to Barbara (she's one of the librarians) last week, and she was like, "Where have you been?? I haven't seen you yet this year!" So I told her how I get no time to drop by. D: It's soooo mean. Busy schedules take the life outta you. Soooo....Madii still didn't come to economics yet. :( She must still be really really sick. I texted her twice this weekend, and she still hasn't replied. I really hope she's ok!! It's hard to not worry when the last text you get from a friend is about her going to the hospital cause she's coughing up blood. -__-; Yeah...um...anyhoo, took notes, went over assignments. I actually like that class. ^^; I thought economics was going to be the one I hated most [it was the one I was hoping to get online and didn't], but I actually enjoy it! O__o I think it's all to do with my instructor. She's so nice and easy to understand. The instructor makes the class for me usually. Tough material can be countered with a wonderful teacher. Likewise, easy things can be made horrible with a crappy teacher, AKA my textiles course. If Sister Denise (who I had last year) taught it, omg it would be so much better. But no. :/ I just have to deal with these things. Such is the way of school. And I know you guys feel (or have felt) my pain. Ok, so this weekend...i didn't do anything. I honestly don't remember it that much, lol. I just played games all day, did homework, watched baseball. The usual nothing! ^^; Monday...I had ethics and OB. Saw the cute guy in ethics and noticed he hurt his right arm/hand somehow cause he had a cast-thing on it. ;__; Poor thing!! But of course, I was still too shy to say anything to him. I figure to give up on that idea very very soon. He's always talking to the [slutty] girl that sits next to him. They always whisper during class and laugh, and so I figure he's lost. >> Lol, as if I'd do anything anyway. XD Um, OB, just took notes and stuff. We were learning about goal-setting, expectancy, and other theories that deal with motivation. Then our prof wanted us to give him an appraisal: tell him the things he's good at and bad at. Lol, we were in groups, and I ended up being the spokesperson of course. ^^;; So I had to break all the news to him, lol! It was really embarrassing saying, "Well, you need to listen better...I know you have bad hearing but sometimes it's annoying to have to repeat myself over and over!!" Everyone laughed and he sorta laughed but then said, "Well, that's a problem I can't fix. Physical problem, you know?" I felt so bad after that, haha. I mean, yeah, he has a hearing aid. The other girls were like, "I can't believe you told him that!" Well, I had to be honest. No one was giving real criticism, everything was good. >>'' Yesterday I had world religions, textiles, and business management. Argh, WR is annoying. Our teacher is such a creepy guy!!!! >.< And we do watch films a lot, but I sit in the way front so it's hard to creak my neck up to watch. DX Um, and he was like at the end of class, "So when do you want your midterm? Next tuesday or thursday?" O___o HUH??? No one said anything about a midterm yet!! Lol. So that came outta nowhere. Of course we said thursday. We haven't even like...taken notes. ^^;; After that, textiles. Another quiz that I'm sure I did poorly on. The night before I felt really sick and so I gave up on studying quite early. I just didn't care. I JUST DO NOT CARE about that class now. My prof ruined it for me, and these quizzes are ridiculous. So when I got the quiz, I looked at it and remembered reading some of the stuff...but not well enough to get them right. ~__~' Just a bunch of guessing. But I don't care. *sigh* It's a consensus of the class that these suck. A failing average shows. At least we don't have another quiz tomorrow. In business, we took notes, talked about more projects we gotta do, and I freaked out. Lol, at the end of class I asked her some questions about the schedule and when things are do. XD I almost cried!! I have trouble asking people questions like that. I usually end up crying for some reason...cause I feel helpless and just so worried. ^^; I managed to not cry though! And her answers did help me. :) I think. I wouldn't be as freaked if I didn't have that darn trip to CA in october. *sigh* At home...dealt with Corey being a turd, did homework, watched baseball (a wonderful wonderful win!!), and yeah. Pretty much it. :/ Today I still have ethics and OB...and...maybe no homework? Argh, I don't remember lol. Oh well. *hugs* Thanks for putting up with me!! I really appreciate you guys. <3333 I'll stop this here...gotta eat before class. Take care of yourselves!! ��

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Friday, September 11, 2009

I just don't know how to quit, do I?

Hello, friends! *hugs* Arigatou for the comments. :) You're all so great!! Though several seemed shorter than usual(?). XD Cause I thought I wrote a lot, but I guess I'm the sort of person that writes a ton but says nothing, right? Hahaha. But anyhoo, thanks!! ♥ Wow, Yug! I can't believe you commented again! T__T You're awesome. And yes, I changed my theme probably right when you commented, lol. You like? :) Thanks to everyone that visited me! Sax, wow, it was great to see you on here. I really appreciate it. ^_^ And of course thanks to jamo, Anna, lute, angelbest, and omg LALA. <333 I love you guys!! So yeah, to state the utter obvious, I changed my theme. Now it's light and flowery...to match the Estelle avi I'm using now. :3 I haven't had an avi of a girl in a while, have I? Lol, I tend to like showing off the bishies I love instead. >>' We'll see how long this lasts, eh? Haha. It's 9/11. It's the...how many years anniversary of the 9/11 tragedy? Uh, 8? Noo...really? I feel so old! It really doesn't feel like it happened 8 years ago. Jeez. It was so horrible. -__- All my thoughts and prayers go out in memory of those that passed away that day. Since this is probably appropriate, I'll reminisce about where I was that day! Ok? *seems really cliche, but it's the thing to do* And, where were all of you? If you remember. I was in either 7th or 8th grade. I apparently can't do math to figure out which one it really was, so I'll keep it at that. But I had just gotten out of math class, and I was then in history when we got the announcement over the PA. We turned on the TV and watched the horrors. At that time...I think there was just the one that crashed, but I remember when we heard that another one did. I'm pretty sure we didn't learn anything in that class...when it was over, I had music, and I'll never forget how distraught my music teacher was. She was sooo worried because her husband was in NY for business that day so she was waiting and waiting for a call from him. Luckily during class he did call, and she was crying...but all was well for her. Then an announcement came on to tell us all to turn the TVs off. ^^; To go back to paying attention in classes. I think we had a moment of silence, but I really don't remember anything aside from this. This supposedly normal date will always have such a huge weight upon it. Ok, so putting that aside. Now for my mundane life! It's raining a TON today. I loooove the rain, but omg, I wish I could've slept in today instead of getting up for class! One measly class. It's such a waste of a friday morning. >.< Oooh, but it's chilly, too. It really feels like autumn...these past couple of days have been 20 degrees lower than the past weeks! It's amazing how it just switched on and off right when it got to september. Summer, hot >>> fall, chilly. Though it's nowhere near officially fall yet. Uh....but yes...I like this weather. Though it does make my head hurt more. :/ I hope it's like this for the weekend, too, so I can just sleep late through it, lol. Oh yeah, I just wanted to explain my weird allergies again. I thought I have like a billion times over, lol, but it's fine. :) My mom was the first one to get these reactions. It all happened back at our old house when we had the renovations done...she got affected by the chemicals that the builders used, and after that, she couldn't even go in the kitchen or do much of anything in the house without feeling miserable. The main part of these reactions involve irritations on the face, so burning and itching. It's really terrible. It was so bad for her, that's why we moved to this house. Well, moving didn't help...she still gets these reactions when she's anywhere near anything that might have new ANYTHING: paint, plastic, coverings,chemicals, anything with a sort of "smell" to it, if you will. Anyhoo, I was fine, but it started about a year ago or something that I started getting these reactions, too. So I also have sensitivities to weird things. It's not just like sneezing or blowing my nose, it's what I described. It gets to be unbearable when it feels like my face is on fire. So I've been getting MORE reactions lately being here in our house and many places at school. They've done a lot of renovating there, so there's new paint jobs etc., but what affects me the most lately is my textiles course because of the TEXTILES. The different fabrics/fibers. It's ridiculous to even be sensitive to things like that. We've tried all sorts of meds and nothing helps, so no, benadryl doesn't do a thing, lol. Sorry, that was a bit long. XD Didn't mean to write a whole autobiography on that! I'm going to the ear/nose/throat doctor next week, and I can't wait. She'll be able to try and help with my allergies (normal and the ones I just described), and perhaps she can diagnose my migraines and tell me more about TMJ (the thing I have wrong with my jaw). I CANNOT WAIT. I really need help. Really. I'm tired of feeling pain every single day with nothing helping, and I'm only 20. I feel like an old lady. Anyhoo...classes...let's see. *thinks* Yesterday I had textiles and world religions. I really don't care much for either class. WR would be good if my prof wasn't such a weirdo because I do like the material. There's nothing, however, that would make textiles better. I seriously dread going to it every time. I've never felt this way about a class before...I'd usually find something good about it, but there is NOTHING in it I like. Nothing. My prof pisses me off with her idiocy and "you get a quiz practically every class BEFORE we learn the chapter, good luck, try not to fail. Oh wait, I rig it so you all fail...yay for 55% class average!" It really makes me mad. I was really shut down during class yesterday. Like I usually answer questions and stuff, but I didn't feel like it at all. She said yesterday, "Well, you guys didn't do too well on this last quiz, but that's ok. These show you your weaknesses so you can study for the exam!" *rolls eyes. Um, yeah. Well, if we all do horribly on all of the quizzes, then I really don't think even a good grade on the exam would help us, would it? If she just did things like a normal teacher and teach us the lesson before we get quizzed on the material, then we would learn it. Sorry, but I don't do too well just reading chapters in a text book. Yeah, I had to do that rant again. It just bugs me. This whole semester does. So today I just had economics. I actually like that class since my prof is really nice and she makes the material interesting. ^_^ Poor Madii still hasn't come to class though. She's only been to one (the first day), and since then she's been horribly sick. Coughing up blood is not a good thing. *sigh* So our teacher is concerned about her, but now I'm not sure how she's doing. I texted her today but she hasn't replied yet. :/ She might just end up dropping out this semester. I love this dog: *hugs* Thanks for visiting me!! Sorry for the (as usual) long and boring post. XD I can never tell how much I write. :/ And I'm sorry if I really don't have any substance to it! I don't know how you guys can stand me. ^^;; Thank you. <333 I'll comment when I can. Take care~

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Wednesday, September 9, 2009

3 of a kind! It's 09/09/09! D:

Hi there, people! *hugs* Thank you all veryveryvery much for all the comments. ^_^ You're too amazing. TOO AMAZING. >D Arigatou to all of you! Yug, omg, welcome back again. You returned to me! *__* I'm glad that you're sticking with the Padres. Since that's where my family moved from, I must say they're like my second home team. XD Kind of. But forever Phillies in my heart. <3 Thanks to wallie, Char, pickle, Zatsu (welcome? Are you a new friend?? I don't remember you!!), Cynthia, and anna!! :) Thanks for all the "happy birthdays" to my mom. And for the reminiscing about the old myO site! The glory days. ;__; Well, we just have to deal with what it is now, and I'm fine with it. I've gotten used to it all, and I like it. ^^ So yeah, thanks to all my sweet friends!! <33 OMG it took forever to get on the site! I'm in my school's library, and apparently all the computers are having speed problems. ~__~' VERY VERY SLOW. So people have been computer-hopping, hoping that another one would be faster, lol. Not working out too well. XD I love sitting at this computer (I tend to be on the same one) and then turning people away from the one next to me. "Sorry, this one is really slow. It hasn't worked well...others have tried and left. You can try if you WANT though." Haha. But it's the absolute truth. As you guys know, I don't lie. I'm a terrible liar. *shrugs* But now it's working...maybe. That is, the one I'm on at least got me to log into theO, so that's good enough! In the mean time, gmail worked so I was replying to a friend's email. I'm sooo terrible at replying to emails. T__T If you send me one, the estimated time of receiving a reply is 2 weeks+. >>' Yesterday an online friend of mine, Aya (some of you might remember her as Jangalian), commented on my myspace. Lol, I haven't used that site in well over a year...I might've checked it briefly some time in the past year, but officially, I hadn't done anything since 2007. She started yelling at me to come online, and I kept telling her I never go on there! XD I just don't. And I don't have a facebook or twitter. I sound like a hermit when I'm clueless about those things, lol. This is the only site I'm consistent with in checking and replying! [PM's not so much though.] I have several IM accounts, but I rarely use them anymore either. ^_^; I love reading the newspaper everyday (just the sports though lol)...I sound like such an OLD PERSON. D: So if you read my last post on my World, you'd see that my mom did have a nice birthday! So thanks! Well, a nice one except for the cake that smelled and tasted like nail polish. XD What did I say before? I said I'd bake her one, but no. I warned her not to get one from a bakery!! Haha, oh, it was so gross. Oh yeah, and my glasses should be ready in a week or something. I can't wait to get my new frames! Char, I've worn glasses for 8 or 9 years of my life now, and I like them. :) I don't thin kit's weird feeling...I'd probably feel naked without them! Ugh, my face won't stop itching. I hate this stupid allergic reaction crap. :/ My textiles class makes it the worse, and other random products. *sigh* So now my face is like covered in irritations. They look like pimples, but no, it's not acne or anything. It's just horrible though...and I can't find anything to give relief!! .__. Bah. And of course, poor mommy was the first one to get these reactions. Anyhoo...today I've had economics. It was interesting...we just learned some formulas. *laugh* For some reason, I seem to like math-related things more lately. Engaging my brain in calculations makes me feel gooood. XD Um, after this nice little break, I have ethics and OB. I'm looking forward to taking my rare glances at the cute guy in ethics, and I'm not looking forward to the slow, boring pace of OB (organizational behavior). Our prof is old and so hard of hearing. We give him an answer, and every time it's, "What? Excuse me. Could you say that again?" *SHOUTS LOUDER* "WHAT???" XD And I don't really talk to many people in that class, despite me knowing all them fashion girls. I think Erica and Jess have given up on considering me a "friend." Until I can help them with a test or homework or whatever, I'm nonexistent. Yesterday I had...a busy day! World religions, textiles, and business management. WR was just weird as usual. Our prof is a total nut-job. Textiles was terrible cause of my allergic reaction to all the freaking fabrics...and cause we had another quiz. It pisses me off. How is taking a quiz before being taught the chapter helpful? How? HOW? HOW???? Biatch. She just doesn't get it. It isn't that easy to read a chapter once through and be able to understand it and somehow know it enough to take a quiz. Studying on our own doesn't really cut it, lady. I don't suppose the grades would be of any indication? The first quiz was fine. I got a 100, and the average was 81. Second: average was 55% (failing, anyone?) and I got a 75 (worse than I do). And my quiz yesterday...I got a 70 (WTF), and the average was 52%. LOL. When the class average is failing, I don't really see the point in these quizzes!! What is she thinking? "Ah yes. I want all my students to do poorly! No A's for you!" *rolls eyes* I can't stand that class. I had a test in business. First we chose groups for one of the many group projects and discussed it. :/ Then had the test...it was open book, but it was all short-answer and essays! So it wasn't exactly easy. ~__~'' Lol, I think I did OK...but jeez there was a lot of writing. I went right up to the end, and most people did, too. Some didn't finish so she at least let them take it home to do. Just wow. I was tired of writing... Phillies won last night. Broke that 4 game losing streak. Though it was another scary game that could've gone down the toilet. You'd think hitting 5 homeruns in the one game would help you out, lol. But it comes down to pitching. Alrighty. I should probably go now...gotta go to class soon. *hugs* Take care, my dears!! <33 edit: Changed my theme! I had to coordinate with my Estelle avi, lol. >>' Nice and light looking!

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Sunday, September 6, 2009

tis my mommy's b-day!

Hey there! <3 Hi, my sweet friends. :) *hugs* Thanks so much for the comments~ Lol, you probably get tired of hearing that, right?? Hahaha. But I'm always thankful for you guys and the time you give me! Thank you pickle, jamo, Deb, Yug (OMG it has been absolutely FOREVER), Angelbest, Sinny (nice to see you again, too~~), Teapot, Nana, and Anna-chan! I think I got all of you. ^_^ Arigatou for the comments. Nana, you only got to be called that once, and that is ALL. Lol. Yug, I've missed you a ton! I wonder if you'll get back on again soon, cause yeah it's been forever! And thanks to everyone that commented on my posts on my World, too. ♥ You're all awesome. Changed my font here. Does Times look ok? I like it. Since theO got lots of new fonts, I've been switching my comments' styles and World styles, lol, and so I felt like changing it here, too. XD Unfortunately myO is still at the bottom of the barrel compared to the new site, so it doesn't get any improvements. Poor thing. *hugs myO* I'll still always love it the most...it's a shame so few people update on here anymore, or comment, or whatever. People think it's "dead," but I don't think so. Not yet! As long as some people still use it, and as long as people still remember it fondly, then it isn't dead. >D So there. I remember back in the day, before the renovation actually happened, but it was talked about...there was a group of members that insisted upon protesting it! People that claimed that they'd never ever leave myO...they'd boycott the new site, etc. Haha, that didn't happen. Most people just ended up just leaving everything. So sad...so many friends that left this site forever. ;__; That was a really random thing. I definitely didn't plan on writing that, lol. Uh, but yeah. Happy birthday to my mommy!! Today (Sept.6) is my mom's b-day. :) She's...well, I guess I won't say her age, lol, but she's not happy about what her age is. XD I don't really understand why so many women don't like mentioning their age! Maybe it's just cause I'm young, and I don't care. But my mom doesn't look her age...she looks waaaaay younger; I'm pretty sure that's where I get my youthful looks. XD I may be 20, but most people mistake me for younger. I could write a term paper on all of the different times I've had someone think I was under 18, in high school, 13 years old, etc. etc. Ahah. Another example of that happened yesterday, so I'll mention that later!! Lol. But yes, happy birthday to my mom. <33 If you remember those Pullip dolls we got before, my brother and I split the cost for one that we're giving her. So I guess that's the gift from me. I didn't get her anything else. ^^; But I figure paying $50 for a doll is pretty good. I made her a card last night (she loved it), and I also sent her a text with a video I took a while ago...lol, of this lizard in the pet store that was dancing. Hahahaaa. So cute. Um, we don't have any plans really. Open presents later, have cake, you know. Nothing special. Dad and I offered to make her a cake, but she quickly refused...several times. ^^' Does she really not trust us that much? I don't understand it. I got the cooking award in high school, and I must say I was rather good! After that, dad and her would be like, "How come you never try baking at home for us?" Ok, so this time I offer, and yet she totally refuses! .___. I think I said this before, but my mom LOVES her kitchen. She loves doing all the cooking and baking. She gets sorta...on edge if I "invade" her space and try to help make something. :/ So ok! Fine. XD Store-bought cake is what she gets. Baseball game's about to start. Phillies have lost 2 3 games in a row...and last night's was just plain painful. I already ranted in a comment on a Phillies blog this morning, lol. So I guess I won't bother explaining to you guys [a lot of you really don't care! but to those that do...click here]. I hope they do better today and [they lost again] tomorrow. So let's see...my last post here was wednesday. *thinks* And I posted a couple times on my world, just updating little things about my classes. I don't think there's anything that SPECIAL to mention. :/ So I'll talk about yesterday! Mom, dad, and I went to the mall, where our eye doctor is...cause, yay, eye appointment! So dad and I got our eyes checked. My eyes keep getting worse...I got a new prescription (-4.75), and dad did, too, but his eyes are getting better. That's just how it goes when you get older. Vision for seeing far away gets better, but reading is harder...so my dad needs new glasses for that. After our checkups, we went to Borders. <333 We had a coupon for 40% off any book! They also had buy 4 manga, get 5th free. Unfortunately they didn't have any I wanted, so I just took advantage of the 40% off. :) I got Karen Miller's new book~~ "The Prodigal Mage." It's the first in a sequel series to the Kingmaker, Kingbreaker series, which was the first I read by her...and LOVED. So yay, I can't wait to read it~ It's giant and hardback, which is why it was $25! O__o Online, I didn't know why it was so much more money...cause it didn't say it was hardcover, so I'm glad I got it in person with that coupon. ^_^ $10 off! Haha. Then...we really didn't do much else. Went to Wal-Mart to check out their glasses though. I'm going to get new frames~~ They said I have to wait till Sept.17 though, but it shouldn't take that long. I hope they look ok...lol, mom couldn't go in so she couldn't give me her opinion, and I'm slightly worried that I only got my dad's. XD But I thought they looked neat. I'll take a pic of them whenever I get 'em. So anyhoo, this is the part where people didn't think I was as old as I am!! ^^;; There were 2 ladies there working in optical, and my dad and I were looking around at the glasses. He asked the one lady about if there were any deals on glasses or anything. "Well, no sir. You wouldn't get anything, but your daughter would since she's under 18." LOL to the MAX. My dad didn't say anything about that, he just sorta smiled to himself and went on with his transaction. Ahah!! Unfortunately I'm not a good liar, so when I was with the other lady, getting my glasses, she asked when I was born. T__T So of course I told the truth! "So...how old are you then?" 20. "Oh...ok..." *laugh* Too bad I didn't get a discount! I guess she needed to do a double-take since she heard the other lady say I was under 18. Turns out they were wrong, eh? I really enjoy looking younger than I am, but at the same time, it's sorta sad. Do I really look that young?? O__o Hmm...so then when we got home, I just played video games. Shows I have no life when my playtime in Tales of Vesperia is already over 70 hours, and I'm not done yet. Lol, I love taking my time with games. In both Persona games I played, my playtimes were over 70 as well, and in whatever else I've finished lately, they also had at least 50 hours on them!! XD I don't know how people can finish games so quickly. It's just not in me. Alrighty. I think that's all from me. I gotta go wrap mommy's gift! ^_^ And then watch the game (by george, those players o' mine better do better). I hope that those of you having a 3+ day weekend are enjoying it! <33 I'm glad I have tomorrow off, too. I only have some hw, but whatever. Take care~~

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Wednesday, September 2, 2009

rushing to class now!

Hello! Hi, my friends~~ How are all of you doing today? How were you yesterday? Well, thanks so much for the comments!! ^_^ Both on here and on theO. <33 Arigatou for the kind encouragements!! Lol, and yes I know I always lie when it comes to estimating the lengths of my posts here. XD I'm just terrible at that! I'm terrible at estimating lengths of things IRL, too. Like "how far away is that from me?" or "How many inches is that?" I FAIL at such things! Haha. Anyhoo, thanks to those that commented: Deb, Cynthia, jamo, pickle, ulter-chan, Cuddly Wuddly sugary sweet Nana-Oneechan [that is the ONLY time I'll call you that], and Oli-chan!! *hugs hugs* Thanks so much. Yeah, I see most of you disagree with what my brother was doing. ^^;; But oh well, just as long as nothing seriously bad happens...he's an adult so he's gotta govern his own life (though he's still living at home). Umm...and whatever else I said, THANK YOU. <33 I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to post today! And that was going to make me mad. >E The internet wasn't working right, or at least it said that myOtaku wasn't working. :/ Something about the server! So I thought my school's comps were just being retarded and weren't going to let me on. Obviously though...things got fixed. Just had to wait a while~ But all is well! i was just getting worried. D: If it didn't work, and I didn't post, I would have a lot of time to do nothing before my next class, lol. I have Christian Ethics next~~ Multiple squiggles!!!~~~~~ Lol. XD Cause that cute guy is in it~ ^^; Though I know I'm not going to do anything about anything. I'll just sit in my seat, try to sneak peeks at him behind me (darn him for being BEHIND), and just do nothing. I told my mom about this guy, and of course she's like, "OOooh!!! Well, try to talk to him! Just say hi!! Come on. Have you talked to him yet? Did you see him?" *rolls eyes* I just think he's cute! I don't think I can make anything of it. I'm way too shy, and I'm just terrible at talking with guys anyway [omg Todd], and so I can't imagine myself ever having a boyfriend (or girlfriend for that matter!). Don't people in relationships generally enjoy talking to one another? Like on the phone and stuff? And going out on dates?? Like OMG NO. I just can't picture myself doing that. *sigh* I hate talking on the phone...and so yeah...I don't know. Anyway, he'll just remain the crush in ethics class. :/ (his name is Shane btw) I wish I were braver. Or I wish that...i don't know, that he just did all the work for me and ends up liking me, too. Lol. I've never had a guy tell me they like me in all my 20+ years. Is that a bad thing? Hmm...probably. *fail* There's also a cute guy in my business management class. ^^; I've seen him around campus in previous semesters, and I liked him...argh. I feel sooo shallow, lol. Ok, so...my brother came home safely from his little excursion to the shore and gamblingness on monday night. He had a good time, won a LITTLE bit of money, which I'm sure was promptly spent on other things...and they "partied." He also said that he met this girl [well, that's not how he put it...his language is crude and demeaning for women] and got her number. A possible girlfriend?? That would be amazing, lol. Just like I can never see myself having anyone, I REALLY don't see my brother Corey getting a girlfriend. Simply cause of his (bad) personality and laziness. It took Derek a very long time to finally get his girlfriend...he's currently 30, going on 31, and they met at 28? 29? Hmm...I don't remember. See, he kept Susan a secret for a while lol. He didn't tell us that he had a girlfriend for over a year. XD Oh, my brothers. They are so odd. Ok, so this week of school has been ok so far. I've been plagued with anxiety every morning still (I even threw up yesterday...), but I'm hoping I will get better as the semester goes on. Monday, ethics and OB (organizational behavior)...we got our groups for our group presentation in OB. Ugh. ~__~' Ok, so it's me and 3 other girls. And I can't really say that I'm happy about the arrangement. *sigh* One girl I swear has an IQ of 2. When we were supposed to be talking about the project and discuss what we were going to do, she was talking about how she got so drunk the other night, how she's been kicked out of bars, and she also said other very idiotic things. I'm not expecting much help from her. -_- This other girl seems OK, but she doesn't seem that helpful either. And then my last hope rides with a girl that I've thought of as my arch-nemesis's main underling. She's the girl i said was in my fashion class and chem last year, and I never talked to her until the last few days just cause I was still harboring some kind of grudge after all the years of torment. Well, I'm sucking it up. I'm letting bygones be bygones and hope that her strange urge to tease me has passed...and that she's equally willing to work together here. We even exchanged numbers so we texted last night about the project and stuff. I'm actually rather relieved...and glad that we've made up, if you will lol. You know it takes a lot more energy out of you to avoid someone and have a grudge than to just forgive! So anyway, we're all not looking forward to that project, and we're pretty clueless about what we're doing...but we gotta do it. *sigh* Yesterday I had my busy busy day. World religions, textiles, and business. And then after all of that (with my couple 10 minute breaks in between those classes) I had my doctor appointment. I have to go to class soon so I'll have to make this quick. ~__~; Uh, but I went there...didn't have to wait long...got weighed (I somehow weighed 5 pounds more than I usually do wtf), and then my doc came to see me. I laid it on him. I told him all my problems (headaches like migraines, neck aches constantly, my odd rashes, bad allergies, and unfortunately I FORGOT to mention my insomnia! ugh! so stupid)...and after somewhat analyzing them, he said that I probably have TMJ (it deals with my jaw not being aligned or something...which causes it to be tense and to refer pain all throughout my neck and head), and there's nothing really that can be done about that. He didn't know what to do about any of these things, so he instead referred me to some specialists. A neurologist and ear/nose/throat. *sigh* Bah!!! It seemed like such a waste of an appointment. :( I didn't get anything to help...and I'll just have to make more appointments and HOPE that they can help. I don't want any kind of surgery though...noo...this sucks. Baseball game = awesome last night. Cole Hamels pitched a complete game shutout again. Phillies won 1 to 0...it was just amazing...i swear I thought we'd lose, lol, but he did so freaking well!! *__* Alrighty~ Sorry but I gotta end this hear! I need to scamper on to class. *hugs* Thanks so much for being my awesome friends. <333 Take care~ EDIT: New e-card, yay.

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Sunday, August 30, 2009

Maybe a shorter post? Just some little rants.

Hello there, my dears! <33 Thank you soooooo much for all the comments. :) I love you guys~ Teapot, Cynthia, Deb, nana, pickle, jamo, and Anna! *hugs* If any of you ever want to be called something else, feel free to tell me. XD I'm amazed that I still get so many lovely friends commenting here! ^_^ I really appreciate it. Yup, rain is amazing...and I see that most of you had the same opinions about musical artists that end up changing their style to try and conform to mainstream!! *nods* Yes indeed. Anna, that vid you shared was really good! Lol, an amusing set-up to sing in that little room, but the song was good~ Teapot, I sure hope that it cools off. :( Sounds wretched! *hugs* So yes, thank you ALL for everything. <33 I changed my avi again...back to Yuri. ;__; Lol. I think I'm going to be changing my avi like once a week or once every 2 weeks now...I don't know how you people can keep the same one for years!! D: I'm just not capable. Too fickle. XD I spent like 40 minutes just looking online on LJ and stuff for a new avi to use. >>' I really know how to waste time! And I switched it about 5 times before I settled on this one. So if you happened to be online and reading comments from me, noticing that it switched a lot, well there you have it. I'm honestly, truly going to try and make this a shorter post. Ok, I'm not trying...just at the moment I don't know what I'll write about, lol. I wasn't going to post today. I wasn't sure when I'd post again...cause of my stupid school schedule, but eh, I have the time so why not? I guess. Right? It might just be a boring post. Haha...when aren't they? So guess what?? *waits for guesses* Ok, no, probably you're wrong! Lol. Well, I've got freedom from my brother for a while!! XD Usually he works on the weekend, but not this weekend...argh, so I would've been mad about it, but no! Cause he decided to go with a couple of friends from work to the shore. To Atlantic City...and to gamble. O__o My brother isn't usually a social guy, but ever since working at Sam's Club, he's...been going out more...I should be really happy about that (since I need my time away from him), but it's just that he's doing things he'd never do before: bar-hopping, which of course includes drinking and getting drunk, going to the mall, going to a strip club (???), and now going to the shore and gambling? Huh?? I know, he's freaking 28 years old, he's a man and able to do whatever the heck he wants, but let's just say that these new "friends" of his have been corrupting him. >>' It's all on him if anything bad happens...but yah. I said this before, but like...drinking and driving is probably one of the worst things out there, right? And he's done that on more than one occasion lately. It's not safe. ~__~' Ugh. But yeah...at least I get time away from him. He says he's coming back monday night. Let's hope he comes back with some money left and not totally wasted. He's doing things that probably would've been common for a guy...uh 5-10 years ago. Edward Scissorhands was just on TV. *__* I was watching some of it...but it was on a channel that had like a billion commercials. It's just inhumane to put a movie on with soooo many commercials interrupting it! T__T Argh. I still don't have it on dvd...well, someday. Lol, I don't know why Johnny Depp seems so awkwardly cute in it. I mean, like disturbing and kinda scary, but cute at the same time. *shrugs* I have homework to do today. :/ Stupid stupid. It's all my darn textiles class's fault! Bleh, my prof is such a biatch, and she assigns soooo much. We have to do this "swatch kit" thing...which I won't bother explaining, but she explicitly TOLD US that she worked on it all summer, but we only got a week to do it!! >.< It's not fair. :( Luckily I decided to work on it ahead of time, so I just have to tape the fabric swatches in now. I'll do some today and some tomorrow [it's due tuesday]...but ugh. I mean, ok, fine, I'm getting it done and it's totally possible to do (lol), but why on earth did our instructor tell us that it took her all freaking summer to do it? She got that whole time, and we only got a week. XD Oh well. It pissed me off at first, but since I'm almost done, it really doesn't matter. I also have to read a couple chapters in the book and study for the quiz, I have to read stuff for Ethics, read chapters and print out stuff in like all my other classes...v__v Bleh this semester is going to be tough, lol. If I have to read chapter after chapter in all my text books every week...I guess I was just spoiled in my other classes! Lol, I was able to be lazy and not read anything and still get by with A's. >>; On tuesday, after my stupid busiest class day, I get to go to the doctor! ^__^ Woohoo! DOCTOR! YAY! ^_^;;;; Lol, that sounds so wrong. No, it's just I'll finally get certain things addressed. My neck that's always hurting, my constant headaches, my insomnia, allergies, and these rashes I have over my body. Yeah. I wonder if he'll ask if all these things are related? Lol, I'm pretty sure NO. Ugh I didn't want to get the appointment then though...I'll be so tired and hungry from that day's classes...but mom said that was the closest time. I hope that it goes well, and I get some help! And then this weekend or next, I'm going to the eye doctor~ Hooray~ I really need new glasses. I'm so freaking blind. T__T (new e-card, yay, thanks to those that commented already!! <333 I know BL isn't everyone's cup of tea, lol, but I love it, so there! >D And it's a gift for AvariceTears. ^^) I've been in kinda better moods lately...though when I think about things I do get depressed and worried. Obviously all the presentations due far in the future for my classes, but the other thing is that California trip me and my parents are going on in October. V__V "Oh, but that's awesome! You get to go to CA and skip classes!" Well, that's not exactly my opinion. One, I don't want to miss classes. I always feel really guilty if I do, and I'm worried about the things I'll miss. Two, I don't trust my brother to take care of the animals. Well, mostly the fish. I'm afraid they'll starve to death or maybe be overfed to death...and I'll be really mad and depressed if anything happens to my babies. Three, we're going to visit my relatives (mom's side), and mostly to see my grandma with Alzheimer's...I don't think it will be fun exactly to see my grandma in such a sad state. She can hardly talk, and she doesn't remember who anyone is. Four, the plane leaves at 7:30am; my dad says we'll have to wake up at 4am to freaking get ready and leave. WTF? Just no...no. I hate getting up early, and 4am is ungodly. I'll get 2 hours of sleep. *sigh* Five, 6-hour plane rides don't really sit well with me. I'm pretty afraid of flying...we might crash. >>' Ummm...yeah, sorry. See?? I panic about things ahead of time. It's over a month away, but I can't help but freak out. My dad was talking about it yesterday, and it just put me in a bleh mood. And don't give me that "well you're going to see your grandma! stop being selfish!" Yeah, well, duh. I know that. But I can't think of many other people that would enjoy these circumstances. ^^;; Gomen. I wasn't going to put anything like down-ish in here, but oh well. Just thinking about that trip gets me upset. Ahh...anyhoo...I should probably stop this here. It's not short, is it? Lol, sorry. I'm hungry, my head and neck hurt, and I need to work on that homework now. ~__~' I LOVE YOU GUYS!!! Take care!! <3 Thanks for sticking with me.

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Friday, August 28, 2009

Rambling is my forte! Things about today, yesterday, random utada rant. ENJOY.

Hello there, people. :) How are all of you doing? *hugs* Arigatou gozaimasu for all of your comments! ^_^ I love reading them, of course. <33 I haven't gotten tired of hearing from you guys...lol...I loved reading all your comments on the whole "cute guy in my ethics class" part! Haha. That was, what, one sentence? Har har! I loved it. Yah, having a "crush" on people can be really annoying, as you said, teapot. And pickle, I agree. It IS hard to glance over and take a peek at someone near you. >>' Especially when trying to see if they're cute or not!! Lol. X3 So yeah, thanks to pickle, Deb (don't worry, your comment was fine!), teapot, sparkle (omg omg whore), Britty, jamo, nana, and Olivia! <3 Arigatou for all the comments, ladies. Teehee! Ah. It's nice and dark and cool outside. Cooooool. It's been SO hot and humid lately that, omg, it being below 90 is amazing. XD Today it's around 70 or 60 degrees...so that's a big difference, and I love it. <3 It was raining a lot this morning though, which I LOVE and hate because I really love sleeping when it's raining...but I had to wake up for class. ;__; Darn it! Rainy days are best served on weekends. When I can sleep in. Ahh...I love sleeping late, lol. I can't stand when I HAVE to go to bed, and the whole sleeping process bothers me, but I really enjoy sleeping into the late morning. It's the weekend now! So I can relax. All this week, thanks to school, I've been restless and having major anxiety, as you know. Even this morning, when I shouldn't have been worried about anything. Stupid anxiety. I downloaded Utada's most recent English album, "This is the One" (?? I think). Hmm...I don't know what to say. Rather, I DO know, but ehh. XD I love her; I love her music, her voice, etc, but this album disappointed me. I guess it's cause it's a new release for America, and she's trying to conform to most of the artists here. :/ So it's really hip-hop-ish...and most of the songs deal with sex in some way, lol, and random profanity. Like, wtf? Hikki, what's happened to you?? She has degenerated! T__T I still like several songs on there (On & On, Apple & Cinnamon), but some of them are just too much R&B style. Too much "oh yeah, baby, I love you baby, your sex is so good" etc. >>; Not that I have anything against that style of music or songs, it's just not my favorite, and I think Utada could've done better. A lot of the songs sound just like Rihanna rip-offs or something. XD Ok, that's all! *laugh* [/randomUtadarant] So today I just had my economics class. I KNEW Madii wouldn't come. Haha! She's so...well, lazy when it comes to classes. It seems like such a waste of money. Uh, but no! She actually had a legit reason to not come-- she was sick! She said she had scarlet fever. O__o Which I've certainly never had, but it sounds bad. Poor thing. :( I was just assuming that she was skipping as usual. I hope she gets better soon. Hmm...so in class...just took notes and discussed things. I actually found it sorta interesting! I was like the only person answering questions though. v__v That's how it usually is. ^^;;; My other classmates don't like participating! And it really really really annoys me when a whole class just goes silent on a simple question, so I feel obligated to just raise my frickin' hand and answer. XD After class, I was talking to my prof, and I had on this pink shirt that has Japanese on it and a cute character that I don't remember the name of. She was looking at my shirt and said something like, "Oh! I know that character. I don't remember his name though..." and so I started talking about my shirt and what the Japanese said. She said, "Oh, I know. I lived in Japan for 3 years." Lol, well, excuse me!! Haha. So we talked some about Japan and her being there and how I'd like to go. It was quite interesting. I'm not used to my teachers actually knowing things about Japan or being familiar certainly with the language! When I got home, soon after...Totoro's groomer came. X3 Yay. He's been sooooo hairy!!! He's been looking just like one big stuffed teddy bear. Hahaa. And now he looks like a puppy again~ A 9 year old puppy, lol. He's actually quite small underneath all that hair...hehe, awww, he's so cute. But he's a little devil! Especially when he needs his paws done. He kept nipping at her. He's a pissy little thing. Adorable, and I love him, but I sure can hate him, too. XD Hmm...random bit dealing with Tales of Vesperia! XD If you didn't know, the guy in my avi is Duke from the game. And yes, he's a dude. Haha. he's so feminine! Lovely, long, pretty white hair...smexy all around, but like omg, his voice is SO low. If you've never played the game before, that's ok, I found a vid that you can see with him. I mean, I don't know what his Japanese seiyuu is, but his English dub is hilariously low! Again, don't know the VA's name...but just...when I first heard him, I couldn't believe it. >>' Waaaay too low; doesn't match. Though I wub him anyways. Him and Yuri. ♥ And Raven is growing on me, too. Skip to 40 seconds if you just wanna see him/hear his voice; the rest of the vid has nothing important. It's just someone's gameplay video...spoilers, sure, but nothing killer. I know...that was random and unnecessary, but it came to mind, lol. Yesterday I had world religions and textiles. And after I posted on wednesday, I had ethics and OB (organizational behavior). Cute guy was in ethics, but I didn't get to look at him much. Darn it; why does he have to sit BEHIND me?? T^T And why is he sitting with some slutty-looking girl? Argh. Not fair. V__V Anyhoo, nothing of interest there...yesterday in world religions, we watched a video on Voodoo, yay. Haha, I actually already saw that before...years ago. I even used a part of it for a big report I was doing on witchcraft. Pretty cool. I'm not a fan of seeing cute widdle animals being sacrificed, but it was still better watching the vid than taking notes. Unfortunately I sat in the front...and...it was like sitting in the front of a movie theater--really bad on the neck [as if I need more problems with it!] In textiles, I talked to my prof more about that project that we'll do in the future. OMG, I feel so much better about it now. I was just freaking out sooooooo much before...too soon. I'm ridiculous when it comes to those things! ^^; But yeah, now I'm feeling better about my classes and things. I'm just prone to panicking ahead of time...with things I don't know about yet. *thinks* I thought there was something else I wanted to mention, but hmm...I think this post is long enough. ^^; Sorry~ But yah. I don't know if I'll post this weekend...I have homework to do. Textiles is filled with crap to do. :*( poo. You all enjoy your weekends! I love you guys. Thanks SO much for visiting me. *hugs* Take care~

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Wednesday, August 26, 2009

A little ranting, but don't worry...I'm coming to terms with this semester a bit now

*huggles* Hello. :) Thank you sooooooooooooooo much for the comments. I mean it like...triple times. XD Cause I posted on my World twice since my last post here, and I've been getting lots of encouragement. I really appreciate all of you guys! <3 Jamo, cynthia, Deb, Raisha, Anna, angelbest, Icchan, and fma! Arigatou to all of you for visiting me. And thanks to those again that commented on my World and ecard before. You're all so sweet for putting up with me! ^^;; And I mean it...lol, reading all my rants. XD I don't know what I'd do without this site and you guys! Thanks so much. ♥ And...this is my first time posting from the school library. XD This semester that is! As you know, it's pretty much my scheduled thing during the school week to go to the library whenever I have free time, and I usually post then. It's just a great time to be relaxing...like finally. When I'm in the library I just feel like I'm NOT being pressured or panicked. Unfortunately this semester sucks as far as having free time in between classes. ~__~' Last time I think I had at least 2 days with over an hour break in between, but now...this time I only have one day (today/wednesday). As I've already ranted about before, I only have 10 minutes in between classes other days. .__. No time to relax or eat! Argh. So I really need to enjoy this time right now, lol. I just had my economics class, and she let us out early (half hour early???) since it was our first day...so I even have more time right now. Yay. OMG I've been feeling so sick today though. D: Like overly nervous of course...since economics was a new course today, and so I just freaked out again. I'm tired, and my sinuses are TERRIBLE. ;___; I have the worst morning allergies, I swear. I take so many different kinds of allergy meds, and none of them work...or at least they don't work right away so I'm stuck blowing my nose for hours. v__v I got up at 9am, and it's currently almost 11:30, and I'm still blowing like crazy. I can't breathe! Ugh, and I feel soooo annoying during class cause I'm always blowing my nose or sneezing, lol. Like so I'm on the computer now (duh), and the comps in the library are set up right next to others in these little cubicle-like things. A girl sat next to me, and I was going off with my allergies, and I think I scared her away! XD Cause she finally left after I had to reach for another tissue. Lol. I don't know what I'd do without tissues. I think I use at least half a box a day. Anyhoo, economics...she just went over the syllabus and stuff. My friend Madii is in my class, which is awesome. :) I never get to see her! We may be in the same college, but we hardly see one another...this is only the second class we've had together. The other one was math in freshman year, I think. >> And she isn't exactly a "good student," at least not when it comes to attendence! Lol. She's always skipping classes...so even when we had math together, I barely got to see her. XD Test days, yeah, and some random class days in between, but not much! She even said today that I won't see her a lot in econ either. Bah! That's not fair. Girl, why won't you become better and just go to class??? Then I'll get to see you sometimes. T__T Classes are far worse when you don't have someone you know suffering with you. A guy just sat at the computer next to me. I wonder if he's cute...argh, I'm too shy to even look over...too...conspicuous. >> *looks quickly* Ok...he's ok...darn it. If only he were that hot guy in my ethics class. D: I have Christian ethics next. I think someone asked what that's about...err, I'm not exactly sure yet. I can tell you that it IS a theology course, and it also involves ethics. It's something like teaching us how to act and what the right things are through the Word of God. Er, stuff like that. ^_^; But we have to bring a bible every class and the catholic church's catechism. I'm not Catholic...and my prof isn't either. XD He made it a big point to say that! Sure, ok, so what? He's the guy, if you read one of my world posts, that has a massive uni-brow! Haha. Ok, as if those two things have any correlation. They don't...just...omg, I want him to shave between his frickin' eyebrows! Lol. I'm sure that class will be OK...not great, but not bad. Especially since that might be one of the few classes I'm taking that doesn't have a group presentation or big research paper...which, I RANTED like a maniac about yesterday. Also, ethics has that really cute guy in it...teehee! I can only hope that he won't drop the course or sit somewhere far away from me. XD I'm obviously in a slightly better mood right now. Or rather, I'm TRYING to be. I'm trying to be a little more optimistic and just not freak out too much. I was so panicked and stressed yesterday...getting all of that information thrown at me in my new classes. Finding out that 4 out of my 6 courses have group presentations and big huge projects and/or papers...just killed me. I have trouble with compartmentalizing (?) information given to me all at once...like...all the syllabi my teachers have given us, and then I look at it and see all these big projects to do, and then I freak out even though it won't be due for months and months, and I haven't even learned anything in the class. >>' So yesterday was just a breaking point for me...only second day of classes and I was already getting super worried about everything! My fashion/textiles course especially. Lol, I already ranted a ton yesterday so I won't say it again...I'm kinda coming to terms right now with the semester and just seeing things in perspective! I need to learn to not get so much anxiety about things in the future. I will indeed be overwhelmed as the semester goes along, but right now, I shouldn't be. It's the first freaking week! Right? So yeah. I need to learn to relax. Worry about things when I get there. When it gets closer, not the second day of classes. *tries to remind self* Last night I tried reading the first chapter of my psych (organizational behavior) book...cause we had to...and omg, I don't get it at all! Lol yet at the same time most of the information at the moment sounds JUST like my business management course. Very similar topics I suppose. But jeez, it's confusing. O__O Uhh...I was super just cranky and depressed and tired last night, so I didn't have a lot of fun. And the baseball game was a disappointment. Phillies lost, but what made it bad was...well, we were winning, then losing, and up until the LAST inning, we were STILL losing...but in the top of the 9th (my guys batting) we took the lead! *_* Like it was awesome! But...if you know baseball (if not I'm explaining), there's still the bottom of the 9th if you're on an away game, where the home team bats. And you send out your closer to try and get those last 3 outs...*sigh* And stupid Brad Lidge screwed up again. He blew the save...so we lost. :( I had my hopes up!! And he dashed them to pieces again. He's been playing really poorly lately. Like omg I don't know why the team keeps sending him out there. Ugh. So yeah...last night was just a bad night for me. XD The whole day killed me! *hugs* I think I'm writing a term paper right now. Lol. Is this post really super long?? D: Sorry!! Uhh...tonight I have textiles homework to do, and we already have a quiz (we have one practically every class)...so gotta study. *sigh* I'm going to hate that class the most. T__T Anyhoo, I'm really sorry if I don't get to comment a lot today or this first week...things are just stressful. I appreciate you sticking with me though. *hugs* Take care~ Edit: Finally got to submit my wallpaper. But widescreen isn't working. :/ Argh, and it's so much better that way. ;__; Oh well. Until that works, only standard with stupid black bars of death is on theO.

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Sunday, August 23, 2009

School starts tomorrow. .___. Noooo....

Hi there!! *huggles* Thank you so very VERY much for the comments!! ^_^ I love you guys!! ♥♥♥♥ Before I forget, Raisha (thanks for the comments *hugs*), HERE is a picture of what my Baby Coco plush looks like. No, I didn't take that pic...just found it online. Little bear plush not included. ;3 He's so cute! ^^ Arigatou to everyone else! Deb, teapot, Char (yup, our mall has a Sanrio store! Luckily it's still in business), jamo, ulter-chan, Britty, Gabri-chan, Nana, and Anna-chan! Wow, lots of people. X3 Thanks so very much! I appreciate everything you said. :) I'm always so...errr...no, such a liar! Lol. I'm tempted to say, "I'll try and make this a shorter post." But I KNOW it just won't come out that way. Soooo...I just won't. You get what you get, haha! School starts tomorrow. T_______T NOoooo!!! Ugh. I'm so worried about it. Nervous, kinda depressed, just...really not happy about it. >> My parents always say, "You have nothing to worry about! You're a junior now, and you always get straight-A's. You're so smart you shouldn't have any problems." Uh THANKS. Just cause I'm a good student doesn't mean I like school. Just cause I'm "smart" and a junior doesn't mean I don't get anxiety about starting classes again. I don't know WHY I get so...freaked out [it's probably just my anxiety], but I just do. The social aspect and the whole feeling of unknown part gets to me. If I don't already know what to do or what to expect (if I'm not completely knowledgeable ahead of time), then I'm pretty far off the deep end, lol. It's obviously impossible to be omniscient about everything before it even happens, which is why I get so nervous before new classes/situations. ^^; Uh...but I'll try my darnedest to be a bit more confident before. I'll probably still feel sick to my stomach and not be able to breathe right, lol, but once I get to class things will be better. :) I hope. That's how it usually goes. I just hope that I know SOMEONE in my classes. .__. Today I went to do the check-in thing. Super nervous before going, but then fine when I got there. Same as the previous 2 years. Except...shorter! ^^; So that's good. Barely anyone was there when I went, and like...there wasn't anything to do except pick up the student handbook. Usually that's when I get our (since I don't drive, that would be my parents...) parking pass! But they changed how to do it this time. ~__~' A lot more hassle. Before we'd just fill out a sheet with the cars' license plate numbers, descriptions, and then bam, you get a parking pass. Not this time. NOW they require $25 payment AND the cars' registration forms!! O__o Like WTF?? That's really ridiculous. So I didn't get it yet. I'll just have to wait...and usually mom doesn't park anyway--just picks me up and drops me off, so it shouldn't be a problem yet. Um...and I still have my ID from previous years, so I didn't need a new one (though the picture is VERY outdated, lol, and horrible). After that, we listened to the baseball game on the radio~~ Gah!! We were kicking major butt!! Lol. We drove past Derek's [oldest brother] apartment, so we decided to drop by...he was rather surprised to see us. Mom and I don't really visit him a lot. XD Gawd, his place is sooooooooo dirty. So gross. What can you expect from a guy living on his own? He has his girlfriend (she's a freaking sweetie) that comes over sometimes and cleans...>>; But she doesn't do that often. All he does is play Street Fighter IV all day, and do stuff on his computer...and making music with his synthesizer stuff. Uh, he's 30 and unemployed. He had a very good job a couple years ago, but then he decided to quit cause his boss was a jerk. Ok. So yeah, now he's been happily "retired" for a couple years. XD It isn't right!! Poor Suse (girlfriend) ends up paying for a lot of stuff for him since her family is pretty well-to-do. She's just too nice! T^T I hope D gets his lazy cheapskate butt up and finds a job soon. Her family can't pay for everything for him, and we can't either. And D hates talking about it, but I'm sure they'll get married someday. ^_^; They're great together (though pretty much opposites), but he refuses to tell us that he loves her, lol. He can be such a jerk!! Just admit it and get on with it already! Anyhoo...uh...most of the rest of day I watched the baseball game. ^^;; It was a great game, and then it went to be a terrible game, and then it went back to being the best game everrrr. XD Bruntlett!!! Hahaha!!! >D He like never plays, but they put him in today, and he did amazing! Though...in the 9th inning, he got 2 errors, and things were looking pretty bad for my Phillies. It went from a blowout to a travesty. But! Then he got a TRIPLE PLAY. O__O I've never seen one live before! Never! It's so hard to do!! Double plays are tough, but triple plays are even harder (seeing as there are 3 outs per inning anyway; that gets it all done in one play). And what made it even more amazing, was that it was the first time EVER in baseball freaking history, that an unassisted (aka Bruntlett did it all) triple play ended a game! Haha. That's so awesome. <333 I was getting upset and down when it appeared my Phils might've lost...but then that happened. Ah, bliss. My dad thinks it's odd that I love watching baseball so much. Lol. "A girl your age should be out partying and going on dates instead of reading the sports page and watching baseball all day long!" XDD Yesterday was a pretty crappy day. I just felt really depressed and out of it all day, anticipating school. Plus, Corey had off from work, which pissed me off...I usually have my weekend to myself, but not yesterday. So I had to deal with him...do stuff with him instead of getting my sweet free time. Ah well. *thinks* I can't think of anything I did...special at all...and same with friday. Goodness, I don't remember friday at all. My mind is really going!! ;__; Uhhh...I thought we did something! Or maybe not! I don't know. I guess it wasn't important. I'm forgetting things more and more lately. Like last night, I let Totoro outside, closed the door, and I forgot I left him out there. He's an indoor doggy to the max. I mean, sure, it was only 15 minutes or so, but that's a long time for him! ^^; Corey started yelling at me for leaving him out there and forgetting about him. *rolls eyes* I was watching the game and doing dishes. I usually don't forget about Totes, but eh...he's fine. I felt bad about it though. DX I hope my memory gets better during the school year... Ok...that's all from me. ^^; Boring, I know. Sorry!! Oh oh. Uh, no one has helped me with my wallpaper submission problem on theO yet. V__V So you can't see my wall full still. Or comment rather. Go ahead and do so on AP if you have an account though, lol. Just...Adam hasn't replied, and no one else has either. :( So it's still not working. Boo. Anyhoo, thanks for visiting me! I love you guys! Good luck to those going back to school and to those that already have returned. Take care~

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Thursday, August 20, 2009

This looks like a long post. ^^; Don't worry! I'm in a better mood than last time.

*hugs* Hi there, my dear friends! <3 Thank you SOOOOOO MUCH for the comments last time. >.< Seriously. You were all so encouraging...gah, I can't thank you enough. Sparkle, Deb, Nana, Lute, Raisha, Char (3 times?? Lol, I don't mind! Haha), and roseeyes! I really appreciate all the sweet things you guys said to cheer me up. Lots of you (duh) understood how I felt about things...and a lot of you were also sorta "I dunno" about posting on blogs and stuff. XD But yeah, I'm glad I have you guys to be here for me! Again, I don't really talk to friends IRL about my problems, so that's why I gotta blow these things by YOU. <33 Thank you all! *hugs* Oh gawd. I have country music on again, lol. I know many of you dislike it, haha...and I used to hate it, but now I think I like almost any type of music [that is, I can FIND a song in every genre that I might like]. O__o I blame it on Pandora since it comes up as related music to other stuff. Oh, and now it's playing Ayumi Hamasaki songs (one of the few Japanese artists on there)...hmm...for some reason, her music annoys me lol. It's her voice. ~__~' Hahaaa, anyhoo, that has nothing to do with anything! Uh, but first I suppose I should address my mood! In my last post I was uber depressed, well, I'm feeling better. :) Thank you very much! That day/night was just a miserable one for me, and I was in a slump with everything. I can't say I'm exactly HAPPY, but I'm not down in the dumps feeling like...crap. Physically, I'm still not all that well (with my head, neck, back), but mentally I'm getting better...though I keep having anxiety about school starting. *sigh* That's this monday! .__. Whenever it gets close to school returning I always have stupid school dreams. Usually bad ones, and then I wake up with an anxiety attack! Argh, that was like this morning. V__V Tuesdays will be my worst day of the school week. My day is from 10:10am to 3:30pm. Well, at first that doesn't sound ALL that bad except that I don't have any time to eat! ;__; My first class is theology, and that goes from 10:10 to 11:25, my next class starts at 11:35 (10 minutes to get there), and then that goes till...12:50, and then my last class starts at 1:00. AKA NO TIME TO EAT. I just hope that I have good/nice professors that let me eat during it. It really depends upon the prof and the classroom. My university is a small one, and we practically never have classes in large lecture hall types; they're usually in small classrooms that are reminiscent of elementary school. And some have carpeting, and when we're in those, the teachers don't like us eating in there. >>; What a bummer. So I'll just have to wait and see how it goes! I can't go all that time without eating. D: Lol. Sounds ridiculous that my biggest worry is eating lunch, haha. Obviously isn't, but I just realized that today. Uh, Sunday I have to "check-in"...so that means getting up and going there to sign in and fill out some papers and things for being a commuter. I always find that to be a major hassle. It's like I have an extra day of school...or rather, they took away my last day of summer. ;__; Doesn't take long, but again, I find it to be a hassle...and it still manages to be anxiety-filled and nerve-wracking. Although I'm still in a slump as far as walling goes, I made a quick wall the other day. It took me only a few hours cause I didn't make the vector. I've been trying to submit it here on theO, but for some reason, there's a retarded error/glitch not letting me submit anything. This happened a while ago before, and I needed Adam to fix it for me. It's been 2 days or more, and he hasn't gotten back to me...sure, gotta be patient, he's a busy man, but still! T__T I wanna submit it. DX I submitted it on AP, somewhat against my will though. I'm just tired of the people there--always so picky and snobby. Which is why I barely go on there anymore. I have a FEW friends I've made on there, but otherwise, it's a bunch of people I'd rather not talk to again (or that probably could care less about me). Um, so if you didn't take a look via my World, HERE is my wall (on AP). I'll make sure to let you know when I get it up on theO, too [if that happens anytime soon]. Ok. So what have I been doing lately? Nothing? Pretty much. Monday...was still feeling down after sunday, especially since I just had to be home with Corey. I swear he doesn't act like the 28 year old he is. >>' *sigh* Tuesday mom and I went out for a little bit of errands. I had to send off my packages (the ebay auctions I sold), and that whole money thing is taken care of. Mom doesn't care what my brother says, so she still paid me what I was owed. >D Duh! I mean, they were MY manga anyway. My brother is just a stupid, selfish, jerk. Anyhoo...after that, we went...to the pharmacy and Walgreens lol. Not exactly "fun." We were looking for a new pillow foe me, one to hopefully help with my neck. We did find one...but I haven't tried it yet. I was feeling still crappy that day, and ugh, when we were at the pharmacy I saw a certain girl I'd rather not see. She was working there. >< I totally didn't see her at first, but then we went up to check out, and O___O NOooooo. *tries to pretend like I'm not there...fails* Uh, she was one of the cohorts of my arch nemesis throughout school (elementary-high school), and she does go to my uni. She was in my fashion class last semester, and I didn't talk to her or make any contact ALL semester, lol, cause I just can't forgive her for what she and my forever-bully did to me throughout the years! Anyhoo, we did exchange fake smiles and pretend to be amiable, and when we left, I felt like really stupid...or just awkward. Cause I've said this a billion times before, but I hate seeing people from school or whatever, outside of it. I don't like seeing friends, enemies, or even classmates I vaguely know. I'm terrible at making conversation if it's impromptu like that. ~__~' And I always end up feeling regretful or idiotic for things I've said. Yesterday, one time when I woke up to look at what time it was, I totally twinged my neck. I turned it...and OWWWWW. It was like getting a charlie horse (pulled muscle/cramp) in my neck! It hurt so much. ;__; So when I got up for real, I asked mom if we could go to the chiropractor. XD Gawd, I see him all the time now!! ^^;; But my back and neck have been really bad lately...so yeah...he said I'm still really out of whack, and he's worried about me, lol. He still recommends I get x-rays done since it's not normal for a young 20 year old such as myself to have these problems. Ok, not exactly "not normal," but uncommon. Then again, he works with lots of older folks with arthritis and things, and so then he says, "What if it's that? How's this or that?" Like, he's an alarmist, lol. He comes up with suggestions of ridiculous treatments or odd chairs for me to use...and I'm like, "Uh, I would probably look a tad bit out of place during class using that thing." Still, it's great he's so concerned (I tell ya he's almost like an uncle to me)...and I really don't feel well, but I don't want to do such extreme stuff. After my chiropractor visit (my neck still hurts though!) mom and I went to the mall. She needed to return some shoes. I didn't get any more clothes, but we went to the Sanrio (Hello Kitty) store, and I got this adorable stuffed animal! Hehe! Their new (?) character is Baby Coco (a baby orangutan). He's SO CUTE. <3333333 I just had to get him. ^^;;; We went in the store, looked around, I carried him around, then we left without getting anything...but then...passing the store again to leave, I couldn't resist! Lol we went back in and I got him. X3 After that, we went home! My Phillies have been winning their past few baseball games, which is awesome. That always cheers me up. :) Last night's game was FANTABULOUSSSSS. I think it's been 40 minutes since I started writing this post...sorry...^^; Woo. It's probably really long, huh? Well, it's been longer than usual since I last posted, so it's ok. I hope you don't mind! I'm too lazy to find an AMV or anything...so all you get is text. Gomen! *hugs* Thanks sooooooo much for being such great friends! ¢¾ I hope everything is going well for you. If not, you know I pray things to get better, too. Take care~

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