Friday, January 21, 2005

   Smile Like You Mean It - The Killers
Yeah, this post is pretty much gonna be centered around this song...yup. Well, sry 'bout my last post. I'm just a silly girl that got caught up in the world of love. Well, it's been really hard for me to actually smile like I mean it, but thanx to all my great friends out there, I've been able to actually smile like I mean it quite a few times this week. Thanx everyone! I luv all of ya! Well, lately school's went well and I've got a busy weekend, so it'll keep my mind busy also. Tonight I'll be gone. Tomorrow I'll go to the mall ( shopping is my therapy. lol), get my nails done, and go to a huge party for my friend's 15th b-day ( Quincenera), which will be from 4-10 @ night and I have to get my friend and I ready for it. yup I'm going to wear this emerald green satin formal. It's pretty. Yup. Well, hopefully I'll be able to have some truthful smiles....I hope. Thanx once again for all of the support throughout the crappy days. I'll update either late Saturday night or Sunday to let ya know how everything went. Yup. C ya! BTW, my friend just made a myotaku account so if u can, plz drop by his site. It's: PrinceofTennis812. Yay! bye!
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Monday, January 17, 2005

Gah, Lots of Catching Up to do!
Whoa! man, I REALLY need 2 update more often! Ok, well I'm not exactly going 2 get everything caught up with, but I'm gonna try & get the main stuff added. Well, this week was extremely stressful, but somehow I managed 2 get all my millions of projects done. At about 11:45 P.M. Wed. night, I had the biggest emotional and physical breakdown I've EVER had. I don't know how, well I guess I've been holdin in a LOT of stress so it all just added up 2 an enormous collapse. Man, it's so annoying. N.E.who... I hope I don't have a breakdown as big as that ever again. Ok, Friday I chilled w/ my friend Mandy and it was really fun and we went 2 go c In Good Company, the movie. It was pretty good, but all of us hated the ending. Oh yeah, I downloaded the new Killers CD onto my ipod. Yay! That was cool. On Saturday, I had another major argument w/ the devil (a.k.a. Ed). man, he's obsessed w/ arguing. I swear, that's what he lives off of. Later on that night I went 2 a dance w/ Mandy and a bunch of friends. It was pretty cool, but... I was pretty crushed and heartbroken. I am sooooo sry 4 those of u who don't care, but I do believe that when u r xtremely sad when it comes 2 love, u do have aching in the heart. Well, I definitely was heartbroken. I kno I'm only 14 and all, but I REALLY was heartbroken. Here are my thoughts...

I thought that we were friends,
but was anything ever there?
I finally found that I was the only one that ever cared.
I came to realize that this was very true,
but the real sad thing...
is that I'm in love with you.

-A Heartbroken Girl...
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Tuesday, January 11, 2005

  I can't see the light anymore...
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Thursday, January 6, 2005

   A Day of Stuff
Hmmmm. I guess I couldn't come up with a good subject. Oh well. NEways, today also sucked. Just when I thought all my friendships were in perfect shape, a bunch of them decided they shouldn't hang out with me, because I'm like a year and a half younger than them. Ugggghhhhh! It's soooooo lame. NEways, today just didn't feel right. I'm just thankful for certain friends that will always be there for me and won't stop hangin' out with me cuz of my age. Man...this sux. I can't believe I was blind this whole time that they've felt this way, which has supposedly been awhile. Oh yeah, it's late and all, but I hope all of you had a happy new year. One good thing is that the day went by pretty fast, so....tomorrow's another day. :/ " Oh simple thing, where have you gone?"
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Tuesday, January 4, 2005

   Confusing is the Day We Live In
Man, I'm sure all of you have heard this or experienced it, but life really does suck at times. I'm not exactly complaing, but today just wasn't fun. My mom has been extremely irritable for probably about a month now, which is really unlike her. Now we always get in arguments and she's starting to treat me like I need to improve every little thing about me. First it was my dad, but now.....mom.
I guess I haven't always attended to my studies, but I'm still over the average grades. I have three AP
classes and I have an A- in one, but the other two are B's or something like that. At least not any lower. Now she's saying that if I'm not trying hard enough to raise my grades before the semester, which I am...she's gonna take me out of one or more of the classes. Seriously, I don't know what's gotten into her!!!! I know some of you will be happy to get permission
to get out of a hard class, but this is where my future is. My academics will get me into a prestigeous college and I AM trying my best in all of my classes so I can achieve that. Well, end of that story...yup. Another random thing. Well, all of you that know me will know that I'm definitely not boycrazy, which is one attribute I like about me, cuz I can actually focus on other things. Man, I don't want to be into all of that stuff, but it's hard sometimes. Yup, sorry if it was hard for you guys to read this, cuz it probably doesn't really matter to you guys, but i think I'll leave ya with a quote my friend has on her xanga. I'm pretty sure it's from a song, but I can't remember which song. " I smile because we're friends, but cry because that's all we'll ever be."
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