Sunday, August 6, 2006

Hmph!

OK, so lately, my sister has been pissing me off with her constant domination over the office computer. I mean, mine's broken so its the only comp I can use. However, my step dad says that business comes first, and my sister said she stays up until midnight doing things for the business. I first of all think, "Bullshit!" She probably spends half that time on MySpace. So then I was asking my stepfather if he could give me more jobs in the business, since they were originally promised to me. He said he gives jobs depending on skills. And what does he think my skill is? Cutting out our coupons. It angers me that he thinks I have no computer know how. Do I know how to do an excel chart? Yes! Can I design logos on the computer? Yes! I was angry that when asked about cutting out the coupons, I said I wasn't good with my hands and that I'd prefer not to do it and thats when my sister says the smart ass remark of, "Well then I'll take that job too." She thinks she's so great. I wish I could out do her...maybe if I wrote my novels, yet my first one, Blood Wolf, is still missing. Its when I have time to sit bored, that I seriously question my life, and it, well, isn't good for me. However my parents enjoy being bored because they are always busy, they dont know how much it screws me up. Im not even going to mention the encounter with a stranger yesterday, during my picnic with Sutarumahari, Liquidsilver, and Delphine. Also the more Im bored, I have time to get nervous about upcoming things. Registration is in two days, and I dont look forward to it. I never look forward to getting my picture taken, but I have a better reason. You see, when you go, you usually have to update medical info. Me, I was supposed to get a shot about a year ago. Im afraid that they found out. I hate shots more than anything, doctors fall right below them. The only thing I can look forward to is staying at my friend's on Tuesday, the same day as registration. Oh, did I mention that if my brother takes me to registration, I have to sit from 8 a.m. until 4 p.m. because he has band camp. My mom wants me to call my dad and ask him to take me so then he can take me home after registration. Im afraid to ,though, what if my dad finds out I need a shot?...Ok, I need to stop talking. Im getting too scared and I dont want it to lead to another nervous breakdown. Im sure it hurts me more than anyone else. When it happens everything bad just plagues my head, and no matter what, I wont stop screaming. I'll be rolled up crying on the floor, and its definately not a condition I want my school to find out about. And then considering the hotel room for the anime convention, I might not be able to get it. I tried to ask more on it with my mom. She asked me if the people going would be helping me pay for the hotel room. I lied and said, "Yeah." Now, I dont know how Im going to get out of this one. My mom supervises my money, she'll know if Im paying for it all. Unless, each friend can dish out $20 bucks, Im afraid my NDK plans are ruined. Oh, well, it was a good try. Better luck next year...
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