Thursday, November 4, 2004

Funny how things change like that. On iTunes: "Chain" Escaflowne. I read an article about "how anti-gay marriage swept the ballot", and now you can find it here. I'm bitter and disappointed about the elections as a whole, but I'm also sick and tired of arguing about it. If I want changes, then I'll simply get more involved and lend my support to the causes that matter to me. Otherwise, time to get ready for the next four years. Even without all that political nonsense, this week has been frustrating enough. I did horribly on a history test, I've got other papers and tests coming up, I've had a semi-constant headache, and one of the better friends I've made this year has up and disappeared. I'm actually really upset about the latter of those. I've talked about Candice before, which incidently kills me because I should just learn to keep my mouth shut seeing as it always ends up blowing up in my face. Case in point, I haven't seen her in .. I don't even remember. She's been very active at her church lately, which I respect. But I'm not the only one of her non-Church friends who's starting to feel like maybe she doesn't need us anymore. We're not quite holy enough for her now. It's very frustrating when one of your good friends claims that she loves and supports you and will always be there for you one moment and then begins to ignore you in favor of her other "Jesus is my home boy" groupies. The couple chances I have had to talk to her in the past week or so have resulted in little to no conversation whatsoever, compared to the tirades we used to get started on. I've decided to confront her about it. I already left her an IM letting her know that I need to talk to her. I just want to get things straightened out. She needs to know that what she's doing is not having a great effect on our friendship, and she needs to know how we feel and why we feel that way. I don't want to put blame anywhere or accuse her of "turning her back on us" - I just want to tell her exactly how it is, what our perceptions are. People change, that's unavoidable, and if she's finding more self-satisfaction and happiness when she's at church and mass and all that, then I'm happy for her. But she can't just forget who we are, either. I understand that friends do grow apart - believe me, it's happened to me plenty of times before - but I'm not going to just sit around and twiddle my thumbs if there's something I can do to stop this from deteriorating any further. So among other things, that's what's been on my mind as of late. It's very frustrating, to say the least, but it is nice to be able to get online and escape from that for a little while. ^_^; Eventually I'm going to take a shower and then clean the shower and then study my ass off for this Italian conversation that I have to have tomorrow. For right now, though, I think I'll just chill. I need a break, heh. EDIT: I talked things through with Candice, so I think we're both all right now. It's all good. And I also bathed, and then scrubbed the shower down. Still haven't gotten to studying, but it's only 5:00 .... >_>;;

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