Wednesday, August 4, 2004

   Look Out Ladies! (at the request of Kisho)
Hello, hello, helloooo and welcome to the show! (girlie screams) You might be wondering why there are so many girls in the audience today. Well, that’s because today’s guest is (girlie screams) whoa, ladies, control yourselves. Today’s guest comes all the way from (girlie screams)....ladies, please wait until I finish the monolog. Thank you. Today’s guest comes all the way from the kingdom of Hyrule. He has been called (screams)....grrr...The Hero of Time. His (screams) past (screams) exploits (screams) OH FORGET IT!! LINK, GET OUT HERE!!
(super-long, extra-loud girlie screams)
L: Thanks, Artukei. It’s great to be here.
A: What?
L: I said it’s great to be here!
A: WHAT!? Hang on! Ozz!
(silence)
A: Thank you, Ozz.
L: What was that?
A: Ozz just set up a psychic sound barrier between us and the audience.
L: Cool.
A: OK, let's get down to it. You know, you have quite a legacy; almost as big as your friend Mario.
L: Yeah, I’ve been in the hero biz for about 18 years, now.
A: I’m a pretty recent fan of your work, actually. Your last game, “The Wind Waker”, was the first of yours I’ve ever played. I missed out on “Ocarina of Time” and the golden days of the NES. But I can’t wait for your next game.
L: Yes, the next “Legend of Zelda” is going to rock. It’s supposed to come out sometime next year.
A: I saw some of the footage at E3, myself. I’m very excited.
M: WAIT!!!
A: Huh?
M: Justin-san, wait!
A: Ugh. What?!
M: (pant, pant) Here (pant) take this. (hands him a sheet of paper)
A: What’s this?
M: Just some questions.
A: You know the rules, Makoto-san. Put all questions and/or comments inside the box outside my office. Besides, I’m right in the middle of an interview.
M: You idiot! They’re questions for the GUEST. (starry eyed) Hi Link. ^_^
L: Hey.
M: (swoon)
A: You two done yet?
M: Oh, sorry. Go ahead, ask him my questions.
A: Right after I’m done with mine.
M: READ HIM MY QUESTIONS, NOW!!!
A: Yes ma’am.
M: ^_^
A: (reads from paper) “What’s your favorite color?”
L: Green.
M: (sigh)
A: “What’s your sign?” Oh, for the love of....
L: Well, I was born in the year of the Tiger, if that’s what you mean.
M: Aww, we’re not compatible. ;_; But there’s still hope!
A: Do you mind?
M: Hey, you’re a Dog, right Justin-san?
A: Yeah.
M: So that means that YOU TWO are compatible.
A: Hello? We’re both dudes!
M: I know. Finally, some hot Yaoi action around here! Woo hoo!
A: OZZ!!
L: Allow me. (gets up) Miss Makoto?
M: Hmm?
L: ^_~ (ding)
M: (collapses)
A: ??? (gets up) Makoto-san? Hellooo? (waves hand in front of Makoto) What’d you do to her?
L: Only what comes naturally.
A: I love you!
L: Eh?
(WHAMM!!)
L: What the heck was that?
A: Apparently, half our audience just fainted. Um...I think we’re going to have to discontinue this interview until later.

Don't worry everybody. We should have this straitened out by about 7 pm EST (that's 4 pm PST). That is, I hope so. L8R!

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