Thursday, October 25, 2007

   Proud ^^

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Saturday, October 20, 2007

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   First Cosplay EVAH!! >.<

Today, I climbed the savage wooden beast!! I MADE IT!!!!!!!!! I CLIMBED THE ROPES COURSE!!! I was so scared that I'd fall! I'm so proud!!

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Saturday, October 13, 2007

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More Lyrics to Suit My Mood

Me and my sis, Elizabeth wanted to start making costumes (Yes, well, it's a lil too late for Halloween, lol, but still, at least we'll be prepared if a cosplay randomly pops up around our hometown) for the heck of it. Elizabeth wants to be Beatrix from FFIX, (which I think is WAAAAY too hard for a first time cosplayer) and I believe I wanna be RED MAGE from 8-Bit Theatre! >.< I'd be a much better fighter, everyone says, but his costume is harder, and plus, I don't wanna (even if I do luv him). I also wanted to go as Black Mage, but I think his hat would be WAAAAAAY to hard for me. lol. At least with RM I can buy a hat similar to his and then spraypaint it. lol. I think my choice was a good selection for a first timer, hmmm?

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Sunday, October 7, 2007

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Sometimes I try to do things and it just doesn't work out the way I wanted to. I get real frustrated and I try hard to do it and I take my time and it doesn't work out the way I wanted to. It's like I concentrate real hard and it doesn't work out Everything I do and everything I try never turns out It's like I need time to figure these things out But there's always someone there going Hey Mike: You know we've been noticing you've been having a lot of problems lately. You know, maybe you should get away and maybe you should talk about it, maybe you'll feel a lot better And I go: No it's okay, you know I'll figure it out, just leave me alone I'll figure it out. You know I'll just work by myself. And they go: Well you know if you want to talk about it I'll be here you know and you'll probably feel a lot better if you talk about it. And I go: No I don't want to I'm okay, I'll figure it out myself and they just keep bugging me and they just keep bugging me and it builds up inside and it builds up inside. So you're gonna be institutionalized You'll come out brainwashed with bloodshot eyes You won't have any say They'll brainwash you until you see their way. I'm not crazy - institutionalized You're the one who's crazy - institutionalized You're driving me crazy - institutionalized They stuck me in an institution Said it was the only solution To give me the needed professional help To protect me from the enemy, myself I was in my room and I was just like staring at the wall thinking about everything But then again I was thinking about nothing And then my mom came in and I didn't even know she was there she called my name And I didn't even hear it, and then she started screaming: MIKE! MIKE! And I go: What, what's the matter And she goes: What's the matter with you? I go: There's nothing-wrong mom. And she goes: Don't tell me that, you're on drugs! And I go: No mom I'm not on drugs I'm okay, I was just thinking you know, why don't you get me a Pepsi. And she goes: NO you're on drugs! I go: Mom I'm okay, I'm just thinking. She goes: No you're not thinking, you're on drugs! Normal people don't act that way! I go: Mom just give me a Pepsi please All I want is a Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me All I wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me. Just a Pepsi. They give you a white shirt with long sleeves Tied around you're back, you're treated like thieves Drug you up because they're lazy It's too much work to help a crazy I'm not crazy - institutionalized You're the one who's crazy - institutionalized You're driving me crazy - institutionalized They stuck me in an institution Said it was the only solution To give me the needed professional help To protect me from the enemy, myself I was sitting in my room and my mom and my dad came in and they pulled up a chair and they sat down, they go: Mike, we need to talk to you And I go: Okay what's the matter They go: Me and your mom have been noticing lately that you've been having a lot of problems, You've been going off for no reason and we're afraid you're gonna hurt somebody, We're afraid you're gonna hurt yourself. So we decided that it would be in your interest if we put you somewhere Where you could get the help that you need. And I go: Wait, what do you mean, what are you talking about, we decided!? My best interest?! How can you know what's my best interest is? How can you say what my best interest is? What are you trying to say, I'm crazy? When I went to your schools, I went to your churches, I went to your institutional learning facilities?! So how can you say I'm crazy. They say they're gonna fix my brain Alleviate my suffering and my pain But by the time they fix my head Mentally I'll be dead I'm not crazy - institutionalized You're the one who's crazy - institutionalized You're driving me crazy - institutionalized They stuck me in an institution Said it was the only solution To give me the needed professional help To protect me from the enemy, myself It doesn't matter I'm trying to get hit by a car anyway.

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Friday, September 28, 2007

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How I feel Right Now......

YAY! My FFIX Piano Collections soundtrack came in!!! I absoloutely LOVE IT!!!>.< I like "rose of May" and "you're Not Alone" The best. They're so pretty!! I also love "Passive Ronmance" That one is sad....=(

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I had visions, I was in them I was looking into the mirror To see a little bit clearer The rottenness and evil in me Fingertips have memories Mine can't forget the curves of your body And when I feel a bit naughty I run it up the flagpole and see who salutes (but no one ever does) I'm not sick but I'm not well And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell Been around the world and found That only stupid people are breeding The cretons cloning and feeding And I don't even own a tv Put me in the hospital for nerves And then they had to commit me You told them all I was crazy They cut off my legs now I'm an amputee, goddamn you I'm not sick but I'm not well And I'm so hot cause i'm in hell I'm not sick but I'm not well And it's a sin to live so well I wanna publish zines And rage against machines I wanna pierce my tongue It doesn't hurt, it feels fine The trivial sublime I'd like to turn off time And kill my mind You kill my mind Paranoia paranoia Everybody's coming to get me Just say you never met me Im running under ground with the moles (Diggin big holes) Hear the voices in my head I swear to god it sounds like they're snoring But if you're bored then you're boring The agony and the irony, they're killing me I'm not sick but I'm not well And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell I'm not sick but I'm not well And it's a sin to live so well

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Sunday, September 23, 2007

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Ungh....My head..... Today after lunch, we got free time outside. Well, me and m friends were laughin and havin a good time and all, when me and my friend Baily, got into a fake "battle". We were just playing, ya know, like fake ninja-fighting junk, but Baily got really rough, and started tugging at one of my legs, so that I would fall over backward. Well, it worked, but unfortunatley, I was right behind a curb and there was a brick column with a pipe on it. I fell backward and conked my head on it. It hurt like fuck. ( iI'm sorry if I'm to profain for you, lol) Before I knew it blood was gushing out of the gash on the top of my head, pouring all over my body. My friends were freaking out, and I just stared at it, scared to death. I was rushed out of the skool, they had to call an abulance and everything. It was scary. I had to get stitches. *sigh* It hurts. I'm tired....

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Dream

Peace is but a shadow of death, Desperate to forget its painful past... Though we hope for promising years After shedding a thousand tears, Yesterday's sorrow constantly nears. And while the moon still shines blue, By dawn, it will turn to scarlet hue.

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Saturday, September 22, 2007

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   HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Last night I had a wonderful dream. I dreamt that I was running endlessly on a grassy field, without the slightest trace of fateuge. I twirled and danced, and rolled down the hills.It was a beautiful feeling. My friends were there with me, laughing and running with me. And there, watching me was someone...I really believed that I loved him. Heh. I wouldn't know what that would feel like though, I've never dated anyone, nor have a crush on anyone. lol. But still. I know how cheesey this sounds, but it was wonderful. The world was at peace for a few minutes. It felt like heaven....I wonder if I'm gonna die soon? I wouldn't be sad if I did. I can't wait to go to heaven.

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Thursday, September 20, 2007

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   Sigh......

Today is my birthday! =D Yay! I'm so happy!!! I got an Invader Zim boxset!!! I've been wanting that for 2 years now....o.O I FINNALLY GOT IT!!! I SO HAPPY....I also got a whole lot of furuba related things. Like the new fanbook!! It's ttly awesome!!

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Ungh....No one talks to me on MyO anymore. =( I post regulaurly, but no one takes the time to talk to me. It's sad, really....Oh well....If you're reading this, just know that a random e-mail would be really nice. Today I went to the dentist. I hate the dentist....as well as the doctor. I loathe them in the way a little child does. It's a waste of time. as long as my teeth work, I'm fine! But I digress.....I was having the dentist scrape my teeth, causing an unpleasant gritty feeling, while "Boogie Night" played as the ambiance. It was....irritating. The stupid nurse-lady kept bombarding typical questions at me, when all I wanted to do was be left alone. Couldn't the idiot tell I was friggin tired? Grr.....I'm really irratable today......-_-