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Birthday
• 1991-11-12
Gender
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Female
Location
• Nebraska
Member Since
• 2004-04-17
Occupation
• Student and actor (at a haunted house)
Real Name
• Erin
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Achievements
• Got voted best Veteran and Theatrical female at the haunted hosue I work at
Anime Fan Since
• Since Pokemon and Dragon Ball Z
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• DNAngel, Death Note, Naruto, Ouran High School Host Club, Gravitation, Saiyuki
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• Medical or art carrer or a writer
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• Reading, writing, drawing, and playing my violin
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• Writing and playing my violin I guess.
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Wednesday, October 19, 2005
...
Time: 12:06 am
Mood: Angry
Listening to: Vampiers Will Never Hurt You © My Chemical Romance
When I'm in a room with
a hundred people I feel so alone
I talk but I'm not heard
I cry but I'm not seen
The sad part is
I never existed in their hearts
I am nothing to them
I'm only another worthless person
in this god for sakken world
...Yeah, I made that poem. I don't usually write poetry or anything. But I'm really angry right now. Last night at Scary Acres was just, hmm...fucked up I guess.
The graveyard people consists of Me, Emily, Terra, Mike, and Jorden. Well Last night Terra said that Tammy, her mom, was gunna bring her. Ok, whatever. So Angela, the prop room manager, put this one kid named Matt in the graveyard. Well, I don't really know what happened but he got moved to the forest so we only had 4 people instead of the needed 5. Terra never did show up. And I'm not mad at her for that. I'm just pissed off at Jordon.
Shes my cue for when a group is coming thru and for a little while last night I didn't hear her scream. Then between groups I saw her talking to Ryan(another manager). Emily came and talked to me and I asked why wasn't Jordon in her coffin. And she told me that every time Jordon screamed she coughed up blood.
Bull Shit...She just want's fucking attention. Then after a while she went back in the prop room and Emily came over to talk to me agian. Emily said that Jordon wanted to cut herself agian and that she didn't want her to so Emily offered her own arm. I'm like, She cut you?! And Emily said Yeah. She said that it made her feel better. I'm like, Thats mother fucking bull shit! It makes her feel better to inflict pain on other people!
Jordons god damn lucky that she sat outside by the proproom for the rest of the night. Nobody should enjoy inflictiong physical pain on other people. Expesially if you talk with them and joke with them every night. It's just fucked up...
I mean, even the guy that plays Leatherface in the texas chainsaw room noticed that somethings always wrong with Jordon. Either her head hurts or this is wrong or that is wrong. I mean, she keeps saying that she can't get any good scares and that people know that she'll jump outta the coffin and they laugh at her when she does. It's the same mother fucking thing for me! Andmy coffin is even more obvious than hers! And I'm still getting affective scares. And my coffin gets hit more then hers cuz mines on the ground where people can get access to it!
I don't know what I should do. We've tried taking her razor blades away. We've tried taking her lighters awya cuz she was burning her pants the other day. We've tryed fucking everything but nothings working. I've been about ready to fucking knock her out but I can't do that lest I lose my job there. and that would suck.
I just don't know...And I'm afraid that Bonnie, Emily's mom, will see the cuts on her arm. I told Emily last night to wash it off in the prop room after the night was done but she said no cuz people will see it and ask questions. So I told her just to tell them if they asked that Jordon did it to her. But she said no And I told her that I'm telling Terra when we see her. But she doesn't want me to so I told her that she's gonna show the cuts to me in the proproom under the better lighting and then I won't tell Terra but you have to wash it off when you get home but if your mom asks you what happend tell her exactly what happened and don't make up any excusses.
I understand that Emily dosn't want Jordon to hurt herself. But sometimes Emily is just to careing of a person. And I told EMily that she shouldn't of done that. If Jordon wants to hurt herself, let her. I don't care about her anymore. I used to say that if we can at least keep her happy and alive for this month then we're good but now, nope. Fuck her. If she wants to die, let her.
I know that was mean but I've been putting up with this shit for about 3 weeks now and I'm getting tierd of it.
Sorry for the long post. I needed to let that out a bit. Oh and I did get to everyones sites this morning.
Wow....it took 30 minutes to type this up. wow....
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