Tuesday, January 18, 2005

   Blergh.
Don't expect this update to be as long and interesting as the last. I'd like to actually get sleep tonight. And I've stuff left to do after I'm done with this. So, yeah. Procrastinator King wins again. Time to start up some sort of tally. Help me keep track.

Procrastinator King: 1

Ben: 0

So, midterm exams were given back today. I didn't do as good as I could have, and I know that. The grades were just about what I expected, but less than I'd hope for. Of course, I'm speaking in generalities. I'm quite happy with my Theology and English grades.

So, without further ado, here are the grades I earned. (Note: Not the grades that pretentious bastards gave to me-READ: Teachers. I try to be an internalizer. Yay, I used a Psychology term! Okay, enough parentheses chatter.)

Honors Pre-Calculus: (Z-Score, without comparative calculation. Final grade may be quite different) 56. I expected to not do well on this exam, and having gone over it, I see that I could have done much better. I mean, everything made sense. It's not as if I didn't understand what the heck we were doing, things just didn't process the right way in my head. I saw something phrased differently than I was use to, or something, and my brain shut down. I suck at Math. I used to be good, but...yeah.

Honors English III: (Grade before curve: 82) 87. I could have done much, much better on this exam. If I had gone over all of the old tests like I was supposed to, I would have known the answer to every wuestion before I even read the question on the exam. They were all right there. I even had extra time to study. It's a big stupid sequence of events. Had I studied the tests as thoroughly as needed, I would've flown through the objective section, and then aced the essays. As it were, I did well on the essays, but had I more time to do them, I could have done so much better! So....right. Happy about this, but discontent.

Theology III: (Before extra credit: 88) 91. Ah yes, religion remains my saving grace. It helps just a bit that I've had 13+ years of Catholic education, a ridiculously thorough Confirmation class (which covered just about every aspect of the Catholic Church's history and policies and the rest); being a practicing Catholic since the day I was born helps, too. No big surprise with this grade. I'm glad I earned it.

Intro to Psychology: 77. Bah. If I wasn't so freaking lazy, I'd have done the extra credit and gotten an 87 instead of the 77. As it was, though, I scored higher than some of the people who did do the extra credit, and get the extra ten points. Significantly better, in some cases. Again, though, if I had done the extra credit, not only would I have ahd ten more points, but I'd have known the material that much better. Grawr. *frustration*

AP American History: (Again, another opportunity at extra credit not completed due to lazyness, or something) 75. I know I can do better than this. I know it. I just didn't study more than the night before. The terms were familiar, the names were known at one point. Just....recalling all of the information from the past few months.....it wasn't happening. And it didn't. I earned a 75, and that disappoints me. I'm slipping.

Intro to Sociology: (Another ten-point extra credit, not turned in.) 74. Another in the seventies. I'm just disgusted with myself over this. Not disgusted like "Oh my gawd, I'm such a loser and I'm stupid" sort of thing. I'm not immature like that (all the time, at least ;p). Just, more of a disappointment in myself. And no, not in the angsty teen sort of way that requires effusive consolation. So, keep it to yourself, please. I'm fine. Just....bleh. I suck sometimes. =p

Honors French IV: 82. Heh, my remarkable consistency finally shines through. My test grades in French for the quarter were 82, 82, 81, and then I got an 82 on the exam. Heh. Yay for an acceptable grade. I also found out my quarter average from Mr. Ayres: 87. Not too bad, if I say so myself. I'm not too disappointed with this. I studied a bit, and that's what it took. I don't think any more studying would have prepared me, really. I'm just a slightly above average student in French. I've gotten used to it.

So, there you have it. My exam grades. I'm not about to do anything drastic over them, so none of you worry. I'd just really like to do something about my inability to sit down and do something. I just seem to have a real problem with doing something ahead of time. If I have a project due in a week, the majority of it is done the night before. All of my papers this year have been done the night before they were due. All of them.

Every. Single. One.

I simply cannot sit down and focus. It sucks. Majorly.

I'm getting tested sometime soon for ADD. I don't think I have it, but hopefully there'll be something wrong that they can identify. That way I can externalize the problem. (Yay, I used another Psychology term!) In other words, I can place the blame on something other than me.

Seriously. I wish it were as simple as some sort of disorder. I wish there was some sort of medication that I could take to help me focus, to keep me doing my work.

And yet, one of my inner prejudices shines through. I don't like the idea of submitting to a pill. I don't want to have to take medication all the time to help me. I don't like to make excuses for myself on serious issues. (Minor issues I am the master at, however. I can and have gotten out of several sticky situations. Yay for intellectual agility!)

Anyways, this all touches back to my idea of "Student vs. Learner." I'm not a good student, I am a good learner. And I'm sure that I'll keep coming back to this problem, until something is done about it, or until something I finally break down. For a long time.

(Last bit was mostly dramatic effect, ignore it. It's a writing quirk I have. :p)
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   Re-durrr-ect
Posted elsewhere, at the whim of another. Feel free to read it and (or) chastise me for not posting it here.

Whatever. :p

XaNgAfIeD
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Saturday, January 15, 2005

   Guardian Angel
Oh, by the way, we're getting a puppy tomorrow. =)
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Friday, January 7, 2005

Yowza....
Yikes.

Hot dog.

Geez Louise.

Golly.

Gosh.

Wow.

Oh my.

Oh dear.

Holy smokes.

Wowser.

Hot diggity dog.





Hmm.


I just got my next hero assignment, and it's a doozy.
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   An e-mail from Ben's Grandmother.
"Ben - Knowing your appreciation for creative writing, I could not resist sending this to you. Love, Nona

Subject: So-what is going on in Hell? And the answer is:

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. I found it to be absolutely hysterical. I think you will too. Now if I can gain my composure, I will get this off... And this is what our young men relate to even during an exam.

***College Essay***

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:


First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are
added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY 'A' "

*chuckles*
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Wednesday, January 5, 2005

Just a quick little update
I had a great fencing practice tonight. The warm-ups and drills were not the usual repetition of useless crap, as I had (for some reason or another) a positive outlook on them. I mean, they were the same things we've been doing most of the season, but...they just weren't as bad, you know?

Physically, too, I didn't feel as tired or in pain after them. It was great. :)

I'm competing in the JV Tournament on Saturday. Hopefully it will turn out better than last year, where I was eliminated in my first round of Direct Eliminations by my own teammate. =/

My coaches are both very optimistic though, and it's starting to rub off on me. I've been fencing well on the Varsity level so far this year, and they've noticed significant improvement in me since last year.

So, yay. Good practice & good mindset are cool. Let's keep it there.

I only really fenced two people tonight. Both of them were J.V., but they were the winners of bouts against other J.V. people. My coach was adamant that I face "the winners", and not "the losers."

I beat Brad, 5-3, although at least one of the touches that was given to him I was unsure about. He hit me on target, but very, very lightly. I don't know whether it would have registered electrically. But, meh, nitpicking. I fenced well. I got him to run into my blade three times. ^_^

Next I fenced Morgan. Morgan's only a Sophomore, and in his second year fencing at St. B's. He started fencing several years before, however, and has had much more and much better experience than me. That bout went extremely well, also, even though I lost 5-3. My touches were well earned, as were his. We were pretty evenly matched, and I had a good time. He was a challenge, and that made it worthwhile. ^_^

Exams are next week, and I've got tons of Study Guides and notecards and the like to fill out and study and whatnot. Never before have I been so "twitchy" about exams. I mean, I'd run through my notes a couple of times, and look over the stuff we'd been told to look over, but I never really wrote out notecards or special exam study things before.

Well, let me say that for the first time I'm worried about my exams. Particularly Honors Pre-Cal. I think this is the year where I'm beginning to favor one sort of subject over the other. My growth in mathematic comprehension is declining, while my interest and skills in English and humanities are becoming more prominent.

Ech.

Sociology and Psychology I know I can do well on, after studying. It's relatively easy stuff, and interesting enough to read time and time again until I remember it. Names are going to mess me up, though. I know it.

History....eh. I know a great many events and concepts and such in History, but I'm terrible at dates and geography. So...ergh. The Study Guide for that ought to be immensely helpful. I hope.

French is usually a guaranteed C+ -> A-. Somewhere in that range. We haven't really done all that much this year, though, so....more indecision. =p

Theology ought to be a walk in the park, all except the information on cults. I sort of...don't have a lot on that.

English...English, English, English.......

200 Objective questions. Little problem with the questions, possible problem with the time consumption. I have an hour and a half to complete all of those questions, and to write a good, solid, constructed essay. And I have no idea what the essay will be on. Yay. *shrug* I'm optimistic, though. I think I'll do well.

This turned out to be a bit longer than I anticipated. Yay for you, you've got a good Ben post.
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Monday, January 3, 2005

Let me be the first to say.....
(Well, maybe)

Happy Wintereenmas! :D
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Hmm
Ten minutes to three....


God, I am screwed. v.v;;
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   Ah ha ha!
The content of the paper is finished! Now 'tis only the format that bars my passage!

And what lies beyond the completion of this paper?

Restful sleep?















Nay.









More work. v_____________v;;
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Sunday, January 2, 2005

La da da da da.....
So, I was sorting through my Christmas stocking just a few moments ago to pass the time waste time that should be spent working on my paper. I hadn't gotten through the whole thing (still haven't, in fact). And what should I find, but a box of generic brand pain reliever/fever reducer.

How thoughtful of Santa. I also got Q-Tips, silly string, candy, tissues, tooth paste, Teeth Whitening Gum, pencils, and some other crazily assorted stuff.

Yeah. Just....generic brand pain reliever. It struck me as odd, for some reason. I only wish I got headaches when I was stressed.

No, I don't. Not at all. Never mind.


I'll just go and work on my paper now. >_>
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