Sunday, August 29, 2004

Bad Weather.

This is really good. Bad cloudy rainy day outside, but I don't feel depressed. Tha's GOOD. Hehehee.. This summer was really short. Extremly hot but it lasted only like three weeks. The Ice Age is coming alrite.. are we ready? Uhm.. last week as I went to the train station, I saw this free exhibition of World Press Center Photography Contest. Man do we live in a sad sad bitter world. I can't help thinking how lucky I am.. and who am I to be depressed with all luck I got (I'm still kinda depressed tho..). It's so saddening. How in Africa they kill each other and this agressive expressions as they hold high someone's bleeding head in their hands... How in a small really poor village in China people sell a pint of their blood, just enough to buy two sack of fertilizer.. and since it's done unhygienically 40% of them got AIDS... and many many more. I'd say the sports picture with all their beauty look really pale beside to those pictures. As I chatted with my best friend's cousin who works as a journalist in Indonesia, she said that she is now already indifferent about such things. She had to write so many things about deformed babies and so on that it doesn't struck her as much as it did. I just didn't know what to say. Both of us don't do anything about the pain of this world.. but I don't think I'd ever be able to be indifferent about that, no matter how much pain I've read or saw. O yea, one more thing. That's is really the main reason why I hate reading newspapers or watching news. It's a horrible world out there. Offer who who am i to be blue look at my family and fortune look at my friends and my house who who am i to feel dead and who am i to feel spent look at my health and my money and where where do i go to feel good why do i still look outside me when clearly i've seen it won't work is it my calling to keep on when i'm unable and is it my job to be selfless extraodinairre and my generosity has me disabled by this my sense of duty to offer and why why do i feel so ungrateful me who is far beyond survival me who's seen life as an oyster is it my calling to keep on when i'm unable and is it my job to be selfless extraodinairre and my generosity has me disabled by this my sense of duty to offer and how how dare i rest on my laurels how dare i ignore an outstreched hand how dare i ignore a third world country is it my calling to keep on when i'm unable and is it my job to be selfless extraodinairre and my generosity has me disabled by this my sense of duty to offer who, who am i to be blue Alanis Morissette

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