Saturday, May 19, 2007

It's sad how people you know become people you knew. When you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of you life and how you used to be able to talk for hours and how you can barely even look at them. It's sad how time changes everything

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i went to bed after cleaning and taking a shower at like 4 in the morning then i woke up at like what 1.... idk then i had girl scouts so i hd to help clean some more and then people came over and we did stuff n such and watched music and lyrics for some reason then everyone went home now im here and bored.... tomorrow i have to be at school by 11 because i have to do a parade in bedford for colorguard and i guarantee britts not gonna be there because she didnt go to practice yesterday and she never goes to school anyways and if she does she doesnt go to class and such and just yea.... im not being bitchy about it or anything im just saying.... so now shes like never gonna go to class anymore and shes half the time not even going to go ti school and im never gonna see her and every time we have plans it always gets fucked up someow and doesnt foloowed through so just yea i should get some other friends maybe. but i dont like talking to people or anyting and im not the kinda person people exactly would wanna randomly go up to and talk to especially cuz id be like why are you talking to me.... and theyd think im all bitfhy and such and never tlk to me again.... oh well i hve no in person friends and shall die alone. im gonna be fifteen in like 2 weeks... >_< uhhhhhhhhhh i dont know what im talking about anymore so bye byeeeszzerektn

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Friday, May 18, 2007

I hate my dad i hate him i hate him i hateeeeeeee him i was tlking to my mom online and i wasnt coming downstairs and i told him that but he had to come up here and yell at me and such and hit my head really hard like ten times i hate him he makes me want to break that what almost 3 weeks i havent done it for...... ldkrnhknjdahkejldbn stupid dumbass father.... i loathe him..... i hate that just cuz hes my family its like instinct to love him and i do... but i dont for any other reason i have to clean now cuz i didnt go to school and hopefully im still going to coorguard practice for the parade but i hope brittany is there... i hopeee.... if she isnt im gonna be in a pissy mood and im not gonna talk really cuz i never do or hang out with the others or anything i only talk to brittany i dont like anyone else... oh well.. i have a majjjorrr headache but im listening to loud music anyways.... the war is over - trust company is a good song.... its weird how if i cry i cant cry for a longgg time i can only cry for like five minutes topssss when he hits me and like if i remember something thats all sad n such and either my eyes just get watery or a tear or two falls.. thats it.. i think i trained myself to not cry n such because my brother used to be an asshole and tell me to suck it up when my dad hurt me.... stupid people w;rkmhefrfgjht g

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Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Earlier my dad like really spazzed out on me cause he saw my arm. I was holding my sister's nose because she wouldn't let go of my dog and she was sitting next to him. And he looked over and saw the scarring. >_< He was like "What's on your arm Caitlin?! Why the fuck did you do that? Why?!?!" and other things like that... I kept just saying nothing and such and just walked away and went up here. I'm surprized my mom hadn't told him already cause she's known. And my sister sometimes would see my arm and be like "Caitlinnnn what's on your arm?" and I'd tell her I drew on it... and she'd believe me. And Ariel saw it on Friday and she was like "OMG Caitlin!" and I got like all nervous and such and just yea... she knew about it though because of James telling her and I showed him a picture once and he sent her it and yea. She said I'm a "hardcore cutter" supposedly... Stupid dumbass... Oh wellllll.....

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Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Blahhhhhhhh

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Sunday, May 13, 2007

happy mothers day to mothers of the world.

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Saturday, May 12, 2007

Nevermind its not happening at all now. The change was gonna be go to my grandmothers for a surprize mothers day almost barbeque but then my mom said she and i could stay here. Now she can't come over. She mightttttt have change of plans and come. But I find that highly unlikely. Oh well... I'm staying here and skipping out on my grandmothers incase she might call and say she can come over. But I'm just gonna sit here bored all day i guarantee.

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UGH STUPID ASS MOTHER plans might be changing. ughhhh

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*dances around* Brittany's coming over today Brittany's coming over today!!!!!!!!!! Yea.... Brittany is is is Simpleplanluver on here. She's my besssssttttest buddy ever. We're gonna watch movies on my daddy's projector hopefully. And my dad suggested maybe we could go to the drive in tonight so if she wants to and is allowed to you might do that. I don't know. Oh wellll.... i gotta go finish cleaning so bye byez!! Just be who you want to be and don't try to please other people. Please yourself so you won't be so miserable. If someone doesn't like you for who you are, then don't be around them. If they can't deal with that than what's the point exactly? People shouldn't try to make people feel bad about themselves and tell them to change. It's not right. Everything in this world is going to be fake eventually if this keeps going on. Because everywhere you see that someone one way is supposedly "so much better"one way or another. Personally I just think originals are key to the best.

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Wednesday, May 9, 2007

so heres some of my family cuz cuz im bored. and just yea. my mom was telling me about them and i just feel like posting it on here so dont read if u dont want it doesnt really matter. so here goes theres my great grandparents then great aunts and uncles then their kids.. kids... kids.... so yea... Ma & Pa Dead. I)Gladys Still alive. II)Ruthie Her husband was I believe mentally ill and was going to die. And he killed her, and himself. III)Jack All I know is he's dead. I think he might have killed himself. IV)Bill A)Bill B)Linda 1)Chris 2)Danny 3)Brenden a)Ashley b)Amelia V)Patricia She died when she was about a month old. VI)Dotty A)Patrick -- He died. B)Gail C)Maurine D)Karen -- My mom says she's a lesbian and that she and her cousin loved each other so that's why she's a lesbian because they couldn't get married. E)Jack F)Paul 1)Leon 2)Jay 3)Jonathan 4)Jillian 5)Kristen a)Rachael VII)Parker A)Mike -- He's gay. He loved Karen back. B)Steve C)Donna 1)Sarah 2)Jessica 3)Kevin VIII)Beverly A)Debi B)Patrick -- Alcoholic. Died when he had pnuemonia. C)Kerry -- Died, something to do with health. D)Dave E)Cindy -- Brought her son to his father's house. Paid for her funeral and such. Said to not have the casket open, before she shot herself in the head. F)Daniel -- Hung himself in a closet. G)Brian -- My mom said he's gay. 1)Shannon 2)Matt 3)Jess 4)Brandon 5)Meghan 6)Ryan 7)Morgan VIIII)Tom No one knows where he is. Supposedly maybe in California. X)Maureen A)Lori B)Sheri C)Marc D)Lucas -- Miscarriage. 1)Benjamin 2)Jonathan 3)Caitlin 4)Kristina 5)Drew So uh yea thats some of my family on my moms side...

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