Tuesday, October 30, 2007

   An Interview With Mah Characters!
I got really bored, so I typed up an interview with all of my characters. That means...

Tigo, my alcoholic, uneployed, and clinically depressed doctor.
Keigo, my sadistic and egotistical man-whore.
Haruki, my fruity, pink-haired hitman.
Naikanni, my sweet, caring, little boy.
Matsuko, my intermittent explosive investigator.
Matsuma, my happy-go-lucky apprentace.
Vin, my bitter and vengeful slayer.
Edward, my narcissistic, British Investigator.
Lil' Red, my annoying and boy-crazy bounty hunter.
Ichiryuu, my egocentric yet emotionally insecure assassin.
Kiba, my naive ladies-man.
Valterra, my psychopathic, charming vampire.

Anyways, here it is. I think it's pretty funny. I aim to please.^^

Character Profiles: Interview!

How old are you?
Tigo: 24.
Keigo: 29.
Haruki: 32!
Naikanni: 12.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (3017)
Matsuma: 16.
Vin: 17.
Edward: 23.
Lil’ Red: 21.^^
Ichiryuu: 21.
Kiba: 30. (Keigo: God, I fucking hate you!)
Valterra: Don’t you know you’re never supposed to ask a lady her age? (Unknown)


What's your height?
Tigo: 5’10”
Keigo: 6’1”
Haruki: Err… Tall… (6’7”)
Naikanni: 4’11” I think.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (6’)
Matsuma: 5’3”
Vin: Tch. 5’9”
Edward: 6’
Lil’ Red: 5’4”
Ichiryuu: 5’11”
Kiba: 6’2” (Keigo: Fuck you, Kiba!!)
Valterra: 5’10”


What are you?
Tigo: Err… A—um… A werewolf. *Sigh*
Keigo: Awesomeness. (Sika)
Haruki: Candyland! (Human)
Naikanni: I’m not quite sure… (Unknown)
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Human???)
Matsuma: Um… Human…?
Vin: What the fuck do I look like, a fuckin’ zebra? I’m human, jackass!
Edward: Not but a mild-mannered Adonis gracing a world which would, without him, be drab and colourless. (Vin: What the fuck does THAT mean?) (Human)
Lil’ Red: Human!
Ichiryuu: I don’t believe that’s any of your business… (Genetic experiment)
Kiba: Sika.
Valterra: A vampire. (Vin: Tch. A real pain in the neck.) I resent that…


Do you have any bad habits?
Tigo: No… (Keigo: Don’t listen to him... He’s probably drunk.) (Drinking)
Keigo: Let’s see… Smoking, pick pocketing, kidnapping, homicide, promiscuous behavior… By societal standards, those are considered ‘bad,’ right? (And much more)
Haruki: Uh, Tigo says it’s bad to kill… Is it bad to kill? (Throwing hissy fits, breaking things)
Naikanni: Uh… I don’t know. (None)
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Swearing, violent outbursts)
Matsuma: Um… I don’t think so.
Vin: Why the fuck do you care? (Smoking, swearing)
Edward: As far as I’m concerned, I’m perfect. (Vin: Perfect?! You’re an alcoholic slut!) (Drinking, promiscuous behavior)
Lil’ Red: I likes boyz.^^ (Promiscuous behavior)
Ichiryuu: I suppose I’m a bit touchy. (Vin: A bit touchy? You tried to shoot me in the face when I bumped your shoulder! If Edward hadn’t torn that gun out of your hand, I’d probably be dead!)
Kiba: Hmmm… I’m doing my best, but I really can’t think of any. I’m sure there’s gotta be something… (Keigo: Burn in Hell, Kiba!)
Valterra: I do smoke, but I’m a vampire, so it’s not hurting me… Of course secondhand smoke is damaging to today’s youth; but… Should I care?


Are you a virgin?
Tigo: Err… *Blush* Isn’t that question a bit inappropriate? (No)
Keigo: No, but I can fake it if that’s what you’re into. (Tigo: You know, you don’t have to try and market yourself every time someone asks you a question…)
Haruki: No. (Keigo: Yeah, you’ve got boys over at your penthouse almost every night. How much do you pay them? I’ll do it for less…) You’re so mean!
Naikanni: What’s a ‘virgin?’ (Yes)
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Unknown)
Matsuma: Yeah.
Vin: Psssh. I’m asexual, you figure it out. (Edward: Oh, Vin. You don’t have to be embarrassed about it. I’ve told you, all you need do is ask me.^^) I’m not gay, jackass! (Yes)
Edward: No.
Lil’ Red: *Tee hee…* (No)
Ichiryuu: Physical contact disgusts me. (Yes)
Kiba: Although I find that question a bit risqué… No, I’m not. (Keigo: God, I hope you die!)
Valterra: I find your line of questioning extremely offensive. (Unknown)

Who's your fiancé/spouse? If you don’t have one, got anyone in mind?
Tigo: I don’t have anyone. It’s probably best if it stays that way. I don’t want anyone getting hurt. Although, I do think it would be nice, for once…
Keigo: Is that a proposition?
Haruki: No one right now. I accidentally killed my last-- Err, oops. I mean… Uh…………… Muffin.
Naikanni: There’s this girl I like at school…
Matsuko: Fuck you! (No one)
Matsuma: *Glances at Vin* No… Of course not… (Vin)
Vin: Fuck no. I hate you all.
Edward: The very idea makes me feel ill…
Lil’ Red: *Sigh* Someday I’ll find the perfect man… Tall, strong, handsome, well-built… And pink hair wouldn’t hurt, either. (Keigo: I know someone you should meet…)
Ichiryuu: The only person good enough for me… Is me.
Kiba: No one, right now. Hopefully someday I’ll find a someone who’s willing to spend the rest of their life with me. (Keigo: God, you’re so naïve! You’ve had every woman in town tailing you since you got here, and you don’t even realize it! All you have to do is close your eyes and point. Bam! You got one. I hope you die!)
Valterra: Hopefully someday I’ll find someone I can really sink my teeth into. *Grin* (Vin: Aha-ha-ha.)

Do you have any kids?
Tigo: No.
Keigo: No. (Naikanni: *Tears*)
Haruki: I dun think so…
Naikanni: I am the kid. Or… I’m supposed to be the kid.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (No)
Matsuma: No, but I’d like to someday.
Vin: Tch. Hell no.
Edward: Huh. That’s an interesting question. I’ll have to look into that…
Lil’ Red: No.
Ichiryuu: No, and I can guarantee you, I never will.
Kiba: Not yet.
Valterra: No. Even if I did, they’d all be dead. (Vin: God, I hate you…)


Have you ever killed anyone?
Tigo: It’s not my fault! (Vin: You sick bastard… Imma kill you!!)
Keigo: *Maniacal laughter* (Yes)
Haruki: I like to make them a’splode.^^ (Yes)
Naikanni: Injured. Never killed.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Unknown, but most likely yes)
Matsuma: No… I don’t really want to, either.
Vin: Well I’ve never killed a HUMAN…
Edward: Yes. In my line of work, it’s hard to avoid.
Lil’ Red: *Sigh* Yes. But no one who didn’t deserve it.
Ichiryuu: It’s what I do best. (Vin: I knew it! I knew you were a fucking assassin!)
Kiba: Hmm. Now that’s an interesting question… (Unknown)
Valterra: What I do in my spare time is none of your business. (Yes)

Do you hate anyone?
Tigo: No. And everyone who hates me has a reason.
Keigo: Let’s see… Vin, Lil’ Red, that jackal bastard, that jackass Kiba, and that bitch in Vin’s cellar. I know she’s a vampire, but I hope she drops dead.
Haruki: I luuuuuurves everyone!^^ (No)
Naikanni: No. ‘Cept that silver-haired guy smacked me in the face one time… That was kinda mean.
Matsuko: Fuck You! (Everyone)
Matsuma: Nah, I think it’s pointless to waste emotional space on hatred.
Vin: Tigo. Oh god, do I hate Tigo. Besides Tigo, there’s always Keigo, Lil’ Red, Ichiryuu, and the psychopathic blood-sucker downstairs. I dunno why Matsuko makes me keep her alive. She’s nothing but a hassle.
Edward: The mysterious pink-haired phantom… Someday, his life will be mine… (Haruki)
Lil’ Red: Mmmmmmmm… Mmmm… Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm… Mmmmmmm… No.
Ichiryuu: Kabayama… *Glare* (Keigo)
Kiba: Nah, I find it hard to hate, when there are so many nice people in the world. (Keigo: Gaaah! I swear to god, I’ll slit your fucking throat while you sleep!)
Valterra: *Glares at Vin… Glares at Keigo*

What is your job?
Tigo: Well, I was a medical doctor. But now I’m nothing. I still have my pager, my lab coat, my stethoscope and all my medical awards shoved under the back seat… *Sigh* Well, I’m gonna go kill myself now. (Keigo: Hey, hey, hey! *Grab* Where do you think you’re going?)
Keigo: I’m a provider of unusual goods and services. *Sneer* Anything you want, that’s what I got, baby. *Wink* (Vin: Somebody shoot him please…)
Haruki: I’m a professional hit-man! (Tigo: Haruki, you shouldn’t tell people that…)
Naikanni: Oh, I still go to school. (Student)
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Chief investigator)
Matsuma: I’m an apprentice mage, as well as a student.
Vin: Paranormal investigator and slayer. That means I track them down, then kill ‘em.
Edward: I’m a PI Executive. Like Vin, only better. (Vin: You don’t even do any of the work, jackass!) I don’t need to… I’m the Executive.^^
Lil’ Red: I’m a bounty hunter. Gonna kill me some bad guyz!
Ichiryuu: If I told you, I’m afraid I’d have to kill you. (Vin: Just say it! Just say you’re a fucking assassin!) Oh Vin, you make me laugh.^^
Kiba: I’m a bartender in Hokkaido. (Keigo: BURN IN HELL!)
Valterra: I’m a professional gambler. And I always win.


Are you into men or women?
Tigo: Women. (Keigo: And women are into you; right? Goddamn, if I had 100 yen for every girl you’ve mercy-fucked…) Don’t, Keigo…
Keigo: Either, as long I get fucking paid. Or they’re really hott. Or I’m really horny. Or they’re bleeding profusely. Or someone’s reeeally drunk. Or it’s Vin. *Sneer*
Haruki: Women. (Keigo: Don’t lie, Haruki… Lying is bad…) I’m NOT!
Naikanni: Girls, I think… I don’t really know what’s right. (Tigo: There’s no right or wrong, Naikanni. It’s whichever you like best.)
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Unknown)
Matsuma: Guys.
Vin: Neither. (Keigo: So what’re ya into? Horses? You have one, don’t you?) Fuck off, Kabayama. (Edward: No, he’s definitely into men. For some odd reason, he just doesn’t want to admit it.) I hope you both die!
Edward: Both; but they have to be attractive. Very attractive. And not clingy. I can’t deal with clingy.
Lil’ Red: Mmmmmmm… Boys…
Ichiryuu: Tch. Don’t waste my time with annoying questions. (Unknown)
Kiba: You query such strange things. (Unknown)
Valterra: Yet another offensive and inappropriate question. My dear, you need to stop. (Unknown)

What do you do to relax?
Tigo: Drink… A lot.
Keigo: Smoke, fuck, hack things, hack things and fuck at the same time…
Haruki: Lay on my bed while it spins. S’fun.^^
Naikanni: Watch TV. Unless Keigo’s working. Then I’ll colour. Or go for a walk. It depends on the amount of screaming.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Break things)
Matsuma: Daydream.^^
Vin: Smoke. That’s really about it.
Edward: Drink, mostly. Lying in the grass can be quite nice, too.
Lil’ Red: SHOPPING!!
Ichiryuu: I don’t relax.
Kiba: Take walks, do some stretching.^^ (Keigo: Imma strangle you, someday…)
Valterra: My whole life was relaxation time. Of course now I’m stuck in this cell…

What's something that you like?
Tigo: Making people happy… I can’t fix my own problems, so I might as well fix others’.
Keigo: Masochistic clients. (Tigo: You’re sick…)
Haruki: Candy!
Naikanni: Um… Friends. I don’t have very many, though.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Screaming)
Matsuma: Vin. I mean flowers! Boy do I love flowers.^^
Vin: I like it when people SHUT THE FUCK UP! (Cigarettes)
Edward: Expensive wine and sex.^^ (Vin: See? You are an alcoholic slut!) Oh Vin, you’re just jealous ‘cause you’re a virgin who’s not old enough to drink.
Lil’ Red: Clothes and boys. Hott boys. Hott boys in tight pants. I wish Tigo wore tight pants… *Sigh* (Tigo: Wait, what…?)
Ichiryuu: Myself.
Kiba: Meeting new people. I love being a bartender. (Keigo: I swear to god, Kiba… Someday…)
Valterra: Money and good food. And by good food, I mean an attractive, young virgin. *Glances at Vin* You’re lucky I’m stuck behind glass, sweetheart.

Weapon(s) of Choice?
Tigo: I don’t fight…
Keigo: Poisonous quills. And guns, and hammers, and scalpels, and bone saws, and maces, and chains… (Tigo: CHAINS?)
Haruki: My umbrella! *Huggles umbrella* (Keigo: Creepy…)
Naikanni: My bladed yoyo, my spikey paddleball and my bomb earrings.
Matsuko: Fuck you! (Magic)
Matsuma: Magic.
Vin: My katana and guns, generally.
Edward: My whip, of course.
Lil’ Red: Mah cannon! It shoots deadly blue torrents of pain!
Ichiryuu: It really depends on the situation. Either my scythe, or a gun.
Kiba: I don’t use any. I’m more of a hand-to-hand guy. (Keigo: God, you think you’re soooo much better than everyone else, don’t you, Kiba! Burn in hell!)
Valterra: Exploding dice, bladed cards, and my lucky number seven.^^

Alright, any last words?
Tigo: Um… Goodbye…?
Keigo: Get out of my fucking face before I fucking kill you.
Haruki: Candyland!
Naikanni: Bye…
Matsuko: Fuck you!
Matsuma: No, just bye.^^
Vin: Fuck off.
Edward: Parting is such sweet sorrow. Arrivaderci!
Lil’ Red: Bye bye!
Ichiryuu: No.
Kiba: This was fun.^^ Bye! (Keigo: Fucker…)
Valterra: So long, then. Maybe next time you come, we can have a bite together. (Vin: God, what is it with you vampires, and your stupid verbal puns…?!)

Okay, that's it!^^ Yay! Err... Okay.
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