Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Okay ones again I have alot on my mind so this is going to be another long post. I'll break it up into sections so if you get bored with my rantings on something another you'll know when I'll start talking about something else.

English
English was pretty funny today. Were in the speech unit and have spent the last few days analyizing Arnold Swartzenagers speech at the republican nationel convention. So, today our teacher gave us out the rubric for our impromtue speeches that everyones going to have to do at some point during the quarter. She also had us write more cards out on what various people would have to talk about like movies, music, whats better, ect. She was sorting the ones that she would keep and wouldn't and someone got curious and asked her what where on the cards she wouldn't keep. So, she read a few of them alowd. One of them had the name of a guy in our class and another had something like medical marijuana, stuff like that. It was funny at the time. She then asked us what some of our teachers did that made them good speakers or not but not too say there names because she didn't whant to turn this into out and out bashing. This of course turned into basicaly a game of guess that teacher. With someone saying my teacher jumps up on desks, dances, and referces to herself in third person, and then someone else saying is it Ms. Gonzules and then the first person saying thats right. Good guess. Or anther time someone said my teacher always mummbles to himself, never expains anything. Then someone else asking is that Mr. Hanely. And my teacher seems like there a realy good teacher but acts scared of us and never looks us in the eyes... This whent on for awile to our teacher asked us if there was anything good we could say about someone. Witch was fallowed by silence. She asked again and again no one spoke.

NSL
Witch by the way stands for nationel state and local goverment in case you've been reading my posts and wondering what i was talking about every time i wrote nsl. We watched a video today from 1984. It was a simulation of the nationel goverment, president in particualar who whanted to interfear with the states rights to dictating education were they are. Witch of course is realy funny now because of no child left behind. Every thing they said was rather ironic. Though whan the pres said one of his reasons was that both russia and the japannesee was better educating I was sitting there like yep this is most defently from the 80's. The opening line was something like our simulation today takes place in the not to dictent future when the president is attempting to tell the states how to...I wonder if 20 years was considered the not to distant future. It was also rather obviously bias towards not having the president do such a thing.

Online Grades
This is sorta kinda not realy related to my post from yesterday. There going to start putting our grades online and then sending our parents passwords in the mail (not very trusting is the school huh) in order to see them. They'll give us passwords too. I understand why there doing it and I don't partcualy mind my parents seeing my grades. I tell them them anyway so its not like theres any surprise but it still bothers me. Its the whole trust and privacy thing. That fact that my parents can know everything. Its like a few months ago my mom put a parental thing on my brother's aol account cause she thought he was spending to much time on the intnet. It shows her were he goes and for how long. She acidently put one on mine too and said she would get rid of it but decided she like knowing what I was doing. Witch is stupid seeing how I don't have to sighn on to use the internet and don't anymore basicaly because she did that. Its not that I go to sights she wouldn't aprove of its just I don't like the idea of her knowing everything I do and go. Same with when I'm reading. I think part of my family probably thinks I look up porn cause when ever they look over my shoulder I change screens. Its just I don't like people seeing what I'm doing exactly and what I'm reading so I just turn it to something they see me on all the time so they won't get too interested. Does that make any sence?

Spanish
I ment to say this awile ago but kept on forgetting. A few days ago in spanish we had a quiz on verbs. It was realy funny cause half the answers were listed on a poster on her filing cabnet. Probably only me and 4 or 5 other people could see it but it was still rather funny.

Lunch
Okay how to start with this. I think I said this before but sometimes I feel more like my friends mother than there friend. Good example I see Shaina and Nicole this morning first thing out of Nicoles mouth was she stole my chocolete and ate it. Followed by Shaina with a smug I'm not even trying to hide it look on her face and smacking her lips said she made me eat it. Right Shaina rigtht. So anyway at lunch I was sitting with Shaina, Donna, Nicole, Michelle, and Step. Michelle whent to the library (we eat right outside it) so I was with everyone else. I spent most of the time doing my math homework or helping Steph with hers a little. When I relize that Nicole, Donna, and Shaina are making fun of the girl again, I don't realy whant to use her name don't know why but I don't whant to refer to her as the girl so lets call her kate. I should probably explain Kate is a little weird. She's a freshmen so on the first day of school she asked if she could sit with us sence she didn't know anyone. We of course said sure. She's kind of annoying to be around and pissed Nicole of because she "ruined" her ceres volume. Honestly she dropped a few crumbs in it and bent a few pages slightly it wasn't that big of a deal. She didn't particualy win anyone over but everyone still acted nice well at least in front of her. Behind her back everyone kept on going of about how she does this and this and then just plain making fun of her. Making fun of stuff she said like she was best friends with the principal and stuff. I hate, I apolutly hate talking behind peoples backs. It realy realy bothers me so I did my best to stick up for her sence she couldn't do it herself. Asking alot wether it was better to be annoying unpuposfuly or to purposfully make fun of someone when they weren't around. That shut everyone up for awile and got me a few I can't tell you anythings you make me feel horrible about what I think comments from my friends. But I managed to stop them from pulling any pranks on her or such. So, she was sitting with us and Donna and Shaina got a little carried away and were making fun of her too her face. Not realy badly I don't even think they ment to I hadn't even reilized they were yet but anyway Kate got realy mad and threatned to pour jello all over shaina. So I quickly stood between the two of them and tryed to settle them both down. Then low and behold one of the random guideness councelors showed up and asked if everything was alright. Kate said shaina was making fun of her. Shaina said something about laughing with donna about something that had nothing to do wiht kate. Later Shaina was like in shock saying I can't beleive she told on me I can't beleive it. I haven't been told on sence fourth grade. Its kinda an unspoken rule you know not to tell on people. Well I felt horrible but Kate stoped sitting with us and I didn't see her so I let it drop. Well back to the present today she was sitting with a group of people right next to us at lunch. Suposedly she had been eating with them for awile and they had always been near us at lunch I just never noticed. witch wouldn't surprise me cause I don't notic alot. Well today they were right next to us. Kate was behind the recicling can between us and donna nicole and shaina started making fun of her. I told them to stop but they didn't and they started making fun of a guy with her too who donna had beaten at a game somewere. Eventualy they started throughing food at her. I hadn't been paying much atention but when I relized they were I thought about asking them what the hell they thought they were doing but instead just kept on trying to change the subject or settle them down or something. Its sounds overly rightchess and like I thought I was above them or something but I didn't know what else to do. Steph was also kinda shocked at how they were acting. I was not in the best mood I mean at the moment I'm sick and I didn't sleep well last night and I'm sick of being everyones concenes so after awile I just whanted to get away from there. I would of stayed and stuck up for Kate if she was alone but she was with like 10 people so I figured she'd be fine. Steph jumped at the chance to get out of there too so we got our stuff and said we were taking a walk. Poor unfortanite Michelle chose that moment to come out of the library. Steph told her to come with us but she was confused so we just left and walked around for awile. After a bit we both said that we felt bad for what amounted to deserting Michelle so we whent back to get her figuring if she whanted to leave she would come with us. When we got back they were settling down well acting different anyway. Nicole had stoped making fun of Kate cause she said that one of the girls eating with her told her she was mildly retarted and she shouldn't do that. First off, why exactly does that matter? Is it okay to make fun of some people and not others? Secound, you had to have someone say that. I mean you might not know Kate's retarted but it doesn't take a genous to figure out she isn't god I hate using this word "normal". I know thats not right to say but its the olnly way I can thing of describing that now. Donna also looked like she felt bad after being told this. Michelle was in the process of stopping Shaina from singing she's special she's special loudly. On the bus ride home Michelle filled me in on what happened after I ditched. Though I did make sure to apoligize several times for leaving her there alone to try and stop Shaina, Donna, and Nicole. She said it was alright that basicaly while I was gone they had kept on going at her and gave kate the nickname jizzing (if you don't know what that means don't ask) and such. I also told Michelle not to ask what that means she looked kinda confused.She said That the group that Kate was with now that she was super nice and kept on saying she was the only one not making fun of kate. I joked that she was taking over my job and such. She then said that donna said something about throughing food at that group again tommarow. Kate and the group she was sitting with did apsoultly nothing to provoke us nothing. Thats just wrong and I'm not sure what I'm going to do tommarow if they start that up again but I'm not going to abandon Michelle and I'm not going to not stand up for kate either. If feel realy bad now for who I acted and not standing up for her or michelle. I'm just sick of being the one who has to say think about this or this. It sounds realy self promoting when I write it down but I swear thats not true. I'm also sick of being inconsistant and sometimes solving problems and somethimes just leaving like I did today. Though you think that they'd take the hint when I walk of without saying anything after disagreaing with someone over something. I don't normaly do that just when I'm in a bad mood or not feeling well. Last time was the day my dog was put down. I don't even think realy thinks that. She didn't even seem to notice. Arg, I know what my friends are doing isn't right but theres not exactly alot I can do. This kinda sucks. I mean, this sounds like I'm making exuses for them but I swear this is how I realy see it, I don't think they relize what there saying. Now I realy do sound like my mom giving me a lecture. Well now that I got all that out I feel much better.
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