Tuesday, January 8, 2008

.........................
i got nothing...


...





...


Bye
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Monday, January 7, 2008

Less Then 3 Hours Of Sleep.
O_O

Woohoo, slap happyness is is gooooood.

Hahahaha.

*sigh*

yeah im actually really bored right now, and kinda sad. but there aint nothing nobody can do about it so i aint even going to bother saying whats wrong.

*nods*

ive decided that i need to re-teach myself how to just stay quiet. i talk way to much these days and i keep making a fool out of myself. that and im going to keep my touchiness to myself, i feel like im just starting to bother people. and i'm also going to work on my neediness, thats gotten way out of control, and im tired of being sad.

so yeah, I'm going to see how much my bottle can hold. its like an experiment, im going to keep a journal of all the things that i want to say and do, and im going to see how long i can last until i explode.

Yay!

*ahem*

anyways, I'm gonna try and get my hair cut today. nothing big, just a trim. i like making a change when i decide on something big and sense i cant do anything to my room until debbi leaves im going to get a haircut.

. . .

and um, nothing really happened today. it was over all pretty boring, so thats all.

. . .

lyrics and i'll go.

"Pain"

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

Anger and agony
Are better than misery
Trust me I've got a plan
When the lights go off you will understand

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing
Rather feel pain

I know (I know I know I know I know)
That you're wounded
You know (You know you know you know you know)
That I'm here to save you
You know (You know you know you know you know)
I'm always here for you
I know (I know I know I know I know)
That you'll thank me later

Pain, without love
Pain, can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain


"Never Too Late"

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong
Who would have guessed it
I will not leave alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late
It's never too late

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

No one will ever see
This side reflected
And if there's something wrong
Who would have guessed it
And I have left alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like
It's not too late
It's never too late

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

The world we knew
Won't come back
The time we've lost
Can't get back
The life we had
Won't be ours again

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late (It's never too late)
It's not too late
It's never too late


one more i promise.


"Over And Over"

I feel it everyday it's all the same
It brings me down but I'm the one to blame
I've tried everything to get away
So here I go again
Chasing you down again
Why do I do this?

Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to

It feels like everyday stays the same
It's dragging me down and I can't pull away
So here I go again
Chasing you down again
Why do I do this?

Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to
Over and over, over and over
You make me fall for you
Over and over, over and over
You don't even try

So many thoughts that I can't get out of my head
I try to live without you, every time I do I feel dead
I know what's best for me
But I want you instead
I'll keep on wasting all my time

Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to
Over and over, over and over
You make me fall for you
Over and over, over and over
You don't even try to


yeah i just listened to this cd so... yeah i dont know, these are just a few of my favs on it.

-_-

Bye
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Sunday, January 6, 2008

Last day of break . . . -_-
I'm not sure if i'm happy or sad. i mean the only problem is getting up in the morning, everything else i can deal with.

*nods*

Um, i finally got that game cube that rachel gave me a while ago hooked up. its in my room, and we got 2 naruto games and a sonic game that doesnt work so we gots to return that. but its pretty fun.

me and my lil sis have been playing it nonstop, so i'm finally used to the remotes.

...

Hm, oh when we were at game crazy they had that whole thing set up so you could play games, and they had resident evil on it so i played it for like 5 seconds and i was like freaking out. me is such a scaredy cat.

o_o

oh and my aunt is here now, she just got here about an hour or 2 ago. so i am now kicked out of my room... which is fine i guess, the only thing that im worried about is that im not sure if shes the type to look through other peoples stuff. cause if she is then im going to get in trouble.

so yeah, i guess thats it.

bye-bye
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Friday, January 4, 2008

Where is everybody?
Wow, like nobodys been posting latly.

i wanna ask how everybody is but if they're not posting then i doubt anyones going to be on to comment.

but this might be fun, i could probably say whatever i want and nobody would see it...

Heeheehee.

...

but sadly i have nothing to say.

*sigh*

oh well.

i guess i'll just tell you guys whats been going on.

Um, im not sure if i posted about new years or not, if not then all i have to say is it was weird and i made a fool out of myself again.

*sigh*

um, my mom bought resident evil 3 the day it came out cause she was never able to see it in theaters... so we watched that and all the deleted stuff.

my moms actually really mad at me for some stuff. which sucks, cause im supposed to ask her to take me and Justine to the mall tomorrow and im afraid shes going to say no.

*sigh*

Uh, yesterday i helped Justine and her mom push there car. so im hoping that maybe that helped my status with her mom... i doubt it though. but anyways then me and Justine got to hang out for a while so that was cool.

and today has been boring. ive just been sitting in my room reading while i let my bunny run around. but he keeps chewing on the carpet so i have to keep yelling at him. i think im going crazy cause i actually sat down in front of him and tried having a serious conversation with him about it, i was all like, "if we dont talk about it then nothings going to change." but he just jumped in his cage so i locked him in for about 10 minutes and then let him out again, but then i got bored so here i am.

yeah i think ive finally lost it...

^_^ but what the hell right.

lyrics and pics then ill go okay.

"Hate That I Love You"
(feat. Ne-Yo)

[Rihanna:]
That's how much I love you
That's how much I need you
And I can't stand you
Must everything you do make me wanna smile
Can I not like you for awhile? (No....)

[Ne-Yo:]
But you won't let me
You upset me girl
And then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget (that I was upset)
Can't remember what you did

[Rihanna:]
But I hate it...
You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long that's wrong

[Ne-Yo:]
But I hate it...
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't want to fuss.. and fight no more
Said I despise that I adore you

[Rihanna:]
And I hate how much I love you boy (yeah...)
I can't stand how much I need you (I need you...)
And I hate how much I love you boy (oh whoa..)
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so (oooh..)

[Ne-Yo:]
You completely know the power that you have
The only one makes me laugh

[Rihanna:]
Said it's not fair
How you take advantage of the fact
That I... love you beyond the reason why
And it just ain't right

[Ne-Yo:]
And I hate how much I love you girl
I can't stand how much I need you (yeah..)
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can't let you go
But I hate that I love you so

[Both:]
One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss won't make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me...

[Ne-Yo:]
Yeaahhh... Oohh...

[Rihanna:]
That's how much I love you (as much as I need you)
That's how much I need you (oooh..)
That's how much I love you (oh..)
As much as I need you

[Rihanna:]
And I hate that I love you so
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can't stand how much I need you (can't stand how much I need you)
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can't let you go (but I just can't let you go no..)
And I hate that I love you so

And I hate that I love you so.. so...


i really like this song...



yeah ive been really horny latly... not that it matters.



this is but why is there a random panda pin on the hat...



. . .



if only our talk could have gone this well...

*shakes head*

me go now.

bye
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Thursday, January 3, 2008

O_O

Rejection is my greatest fear.

...

yeah, later.





...


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Sunday, December 30, 2007

   *Sigh*
hello, how are you peoples?

-_-

...

yeah i cant think straight right now so im just going to list some crap thats happened.

i went to the mall yesterday with the asian, karina, and michelle. it was fun, although i had $20 and didnt buy anything but lunch.

um, ive been re-reading Basara (manga) if you havent read it you should. right now im on volume 17 and i asked the library to order volumes 24-26 when we went to the library today. and i also got black cat volumes 1-9.(ive already read 1-6)

we went shopping.

we cleaned out my room because my aunt debbie is coming to live with us for a while and she gets my room, which sucks but whatever, i sleep better on the couch anyways.

*shrugs*

uh, at 7:15 im going to see AvP 2. so i hope that goes well. i havent seen a scary movie in a while, all the new movies lately have been funny ones. so i probably wont be able to sleep tonight. (im a baby after scary movies, it just gets my imaginaion going i guess.)

and while me and my mom watch that my lil sis is going to see the chipmunks movie. (she cant handle scary movies)

and this is random but lately ive been wanting to draw naked people. im not sure why. i mean im not horny or anything im just bored out of my mind.

you know what i did today? for like 20 minutes i walked around my house listening to another gay movie soundtrack and shocking myself. i have these green fuzzy socks and when i drag my feet i get all charged up. its fun when there are other people to poke/shock, but its just pathetic when your alone poking metal objects. (but its fun to see the little lightning thingy) and you know what bugs me, when i touched the wall i got shocked. isnt that weird, i mean its like plaster isnt it. i guess i just didnt think that the walls would do that. it kind of amazed me... i almost touched one of the sockets. but then i got scared, which is funny cause a while ago i would have just done it. although i doubt it would have killed me.

...

i miss my friends.

i miss going to school.

o_o

wow, thats sad.

*shakes head*

just one more week right.

*sigh*

me go now.



later peoples
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Thursday, December 27, 2007

   Fucked Up Dream...
yeah, well last night i had a really REALLY weird dream. and uh, im to lazy to type up the whole thing so ill just say the one part that really freaked me out...

drum roll.

-_-

yeah i made out with a guy, and it was a guy that i know and hate. so yeah, me is really confused and creeped out.

...

*shivers*

and yeah thats the only thing i gots to talk about.

so bye-bye
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Wednesday, December 26, 2007

bored
Hiya!

...

yeah i dont have anything to say.

so lyrics and i go.

Tattoo Kisshajimari wa aka to kuro no Passiontoki ni urahara na kokoro wo tayori ni
Tattoo Kisskiri fuda wa mirai wo kaeru Missionkoi ni aimai na kotae wa iranai
arienai genjitsumienai FURI shite mo Betegatai shinjitsuCan U feel me now?
nesshi yasui jibun ni Say what?tomadou ii bu
Dreamin' samenai yumeochiteku sadameDon't stop lovin'Can't stop lovin' UYA YA YA...
Believe in Uhikikae ni subete ushinatte moStill lovin'Can't stop lovin' UNO NO NO...
kizu hitotsu kurezu niowaru nante One more playKYANSERU nara imaDo U love me more?
kawari yasui kibun wa Big dealsamayou Heaven
Dreamin' ichiru no hoshimegami ni yudaneDon't stop lovin'Can't stop lovin' UYA YA YA...
Believe in Unozomu MONO subete te ni shite moStill lovin'Can't stop lovin' UNO NO NO...
Dreamin' samenai yumeochiteku sadameDon't stop lovin'Can't stop lovin' UYA YA YA...
Believe in Uhikikae ni subete ushinatte moStill lovin'Can't stop lovin' UNO NO NO...
Tattoo Kisshajimari wa aka to kuro no Passiontoki ni urahara na kokoro wo tayori ni
Tattoo Kisssukoshizutsu kinou ni fure Passiontsune ni iro asenu RISUKU wo kiri sute
Tattoo Kisskiri fuda wa mirai wo kaeru Missionkoi ni aimai na kotae wa iranai

Hahaha, now for the english version. >_<

tattoo kissthe beginning is the red and black passionrelying on my contrary heart at times
tattoo kissthe trump card is the mission to change the futureI don't need unclear answers for love
the reality that's unbelievableeven if I pretend not to see it, I betthat truth I drew outcan you feel me now?
to myself who gets excited easily, say what?the eve I hesitate
dreamin' the dream that won't stopit's destined to falldon't stop lovin'can't stop lovin' youya ya ya...
believe in youeven if I lose everything in exchange for itstill lovin'can't stop lovin' youno no no...
without giving me any pain at alland ending it, give me one more playnow's the time to canceldo you love me more?
the easily changed feeling is a big dealwandering in heaven
dreamin' the top rated starI leave it up to the goddessdon't stop lovin'can't stop lovin' youya ya ya...
believe in youeven if I gain everything I wantedstill lovin'can't stop lovin' Uno no no...
dreamin' the dream that won't stopit's destined to falldon't stop lovin'can't stop lovin' youya ya ya...
believe in youeven if I lose everything in exchange for itstill lovin'can't stop lovin' youno no no...
tattoo kissthe beginning is the red and black passionrelying on my contrary heart at times
tattoo kisstouching upon yesterday slowly, passioncutting off the risk that will never fade
tattoo kissthe trump card is the mission to change the futureI don't need unclear answers for love

yeah thats the opening song to kaleido star new wing.

i got the box set for christmas and watched the whole thing yesterday.

^_^

love ya

bye
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Monday, December 24, 2007

   Tomorrows Christmas!
YAY!

ok so im prbably not going to go on the internet tomorrow so i just wanna say merry christmas to everyone now.

And, today is my bunnys birthday. hes now 2 years old.

^_^

i sang to him and gave him a treat and stuffs.

*nods*

and yeah, thats it.

...

Oh i watched superbad last night. it was funny, but i didnt like the ending. they could have kept going with it.

but yeah, over all it was a good movie.

...

and now me go bye-bye.

*waves*
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Sunday, December 23, 2007

Saturday Night Movie
*sigh*

Ok so yesterday Justine, Kay, Tony, and Me went to see the chipmunk’s movie. And it ended up being a good movie. After the movie we walked over to Starbucks and talked and looked at magazines and Justine and Tony had coffee. Then after a while we went to some bread place. (I can’t remember the name… it started with a P though)

Anyways, we hung out until 9:30 something.

But Justine ended up getting in trouble, which sucks.

. . .

Oh, I gave Justine her Christmas gift and she gave me mine. It was funny cause we both thought the other was going to hate it but we both ended up liking the gifts.( We wore them to the movie, and I’m wearing it mine right now) -_-

So me was happy about that.

. . .

Um, there isn’t much more to say.

I couldn’t sleep last night.

And weight loss is now up to 19 pounds.

^_^

YAY!

Now for today’s lyrics and a picture.

SUGARCULT LYRICS

"Memory"

This may never start.
We could fall apart.
And I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
Feelings insincere.
Can I be your memory?

So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.

This may never start.
I'll tear us apart.
Can I be your enemy?
Losing half a year.
Waiting for you here
I'd be your anything.

So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.

This may never start.
Tearing out my heart.
I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
(I'd be your memory)
Feelings disappeared.
Can I be your memory?

So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.

This may never start.
We could fall apart
And I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
Feelings insincere.
Can I be your memory?
Can I be your memory?

I love this song.



Bye-bye
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