Sunday, May 7, 2006

   So, I'm A Bad Person Now...
Listen to me, you ignorant, self-centered bitch. I went through the process of tearing that little IM of yours to shreds.

"I don't know what your fucking problem is, but I want you to leave me the fuck alone."

I was leaving you the fuck alone; I thought you figured that out when I went out of my way to avoid all fucking contact with you. Notice how for the last couple of months the only words I spoke to you was, "Physics Books, I want them back". I also had no problem, The Polish thing wasn't directed at you, I thought writing "And people who think everything is about them" would have tipped you the hell off, and by the way, I didn't put that fucking Shmoo up there either. My problem is that you kept erasing what I had put up, and I don't stand for that shit so I kept putting it right back up there.

"I am sick of putting up with your 'woe is me' bullshit."

I loved this part. Remember that one time I IM'd you while you were drunk? I told you I felt shitty? Huh? That was the one time I was actually serious about feeling like shit and could have used some cheering up. Your reply? "Oh, pity party Ross 201" That was the last straw for me, that was the point where I snapped and said to myself, "Fuck this Bitch". Guess what, your whole life is a fucking pity party, its always people at theater hate me, Jillian is being a bitch, my family sucks, I have too much schoolwork to do, people on my floor don't like me, my roommate sucks, I don't want to hang out with my boyfriend, does that make me a bad person?, life is hard, I'm allergic to apples, I have to bring up that I had an eating disorder at least twice a week, meat tastes bad to me, did I mention that people at theater don't like me?, Kip is spreading rumors about me, people fucking stalk me, the bitches in my fucking T Shirt club don't like me for some reason, people at camp don't like me, people at home don't like me, blah blah fucking blah. With this many people that don't like you have you ever stopped and thought to yourself, "Wow, maybe I am a complete and total bitch and that's why people hate me?". You thrive on pity, its what fuels you. Everything about you is woe is fucking me, well guess what; other people have it much worse than you, you stupid self-centered bitch. At first I tried consoling you all the time to maybe cheer you up, but you weren't after that, you wanted everyone to feel bad for you. I got sick of your "woe is me" bullshit.

"You have doe nothing but treated me like shit this semester, and I put up with it."

So being truthful is treating you like shit? Putting time aside for you is treating you like shit? Helping you when you ask for it is treating you like shit? Taking hours out of my day to tutor your dumb ass in physics is treating you like shit? This is another statement that once again you got ass backwards. I was the one treated like complete shit, and I am the one who put up with it. You fucking lied to me hardcore, first about the Mitch thing, then about the weed, and don't even think to yourself that it wasn't a lie because you never actually said it. You put up a visage, masking your true self to me, and you did it purposely. You hid the fact that you were a stoner and you hid the fact that you were dating Mitch. All of a sudden you started completely ignoring me. I would make plans with you days in advance and you would still cancel them. Like that one night we were supposed to watch Fight Club. Mitch was late, so you pushed back the movie, it wasn't, "Oh sorry Mitch, I promised Chris I would watch this movie with him, can we just hang out later tonight?" no it was fuck you Chris, your time isn't important to me, and I don't give a fuck if you were pushing off doing homework to spend time with me. When I make plans with somebody I keep them. Whenever I told you something you did that upset me I was being truthful, I wasn't about to lie to somebody whom I assumed was a good friend, but whenever I told you something you turned it right back around at me. I only brought something up if it was making me feel bad, but when I brought it up and told you how you were mistreating me you would go on your fucking little, "I don't like feeling like I should apologize to you" speech, which in turn made me feel worse. So I was put in the situation of either grit my teeth and hide my emotions or be truthful and feel even worse cause I managed to upset you.

I also love how at one point you would only come down and interact with me when you needed something, paper, use of my printer, help with a problem, etc. and how when I mentioned it you would give me shit. I also love seeing you do the same thing to Mike and Bill. After the play was over did you hang out with Bill at all now that he had already helped you with the lights? Have you hung out with Mike when you don't need to use his printer? Do you even stop and chat with Dan?

"No more. Stop trying to make me miserable and acting like Jillian, and move on with your fucking life."

Once again, I had moved on. I wasn't talking to you and I wasn't doing anything to bother you, I had dropped the subject and just pushed you the fuck out of my life. You want to know why every time I see you I would just glare at you? It is because every time I see you, hear you, or even smell that fucking perfume you use I am reminded of how much you fucking hurt me, I get pissed off and sick to my stomach. I was not trying to make you fucking miserable, I'm not a cruel person, once again not everything is about you, you self centered bitch. Also, how the fuck am I like Jillian? The only thing I see that I have in common with her is that I hate your fucking guts. If its something along the lines of I have been trying to turn the rest of the guys against you, you are way off base. I have mentioned to both of them that my problem was just with you, and I knew that they were still friendly with you. I told them that I wouldn't hold it against them for it because that would be a bastard thing to do. Not that saying it to you would make any difference but I see myself as a reasonable person, I make rational decisions and I'm not a complete fucktard when it comes to other people. You on the other hand must have fabricated this list of things I've been doing to make you miserable since I stopped talking to you in some attempt to justify your anger towards me.

"Just drop it."

I had dropped it; you brought it up again, and made me remember what I was trying to forget. Nothing would make me happier than to never have to see or talk to you again. I want you out of my life and I wish I could forget what you have done to me. In conclusion, shut the fuck up bitch, you are broken, leave me the hell alone, and good day.
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