Thursday, March 31, 2005

Sorry for the lack of fic...
It seems there are still a few technical problems with it, like, chronological order. Right now you'd need a time machine to make it make sense. So right now I'm trying to fix things and maybe add a bit more humor where needed. I'll post more of it when I finally get it right (I think we jumped the gun putting it up in the first place...) -_- Be back soon...
Comments (2) | Permalink

Friday, March 25, 2005

Sorry guys
No more story til about Monday. I hafta go to South Carolina to visit family for Easter. ^_^ I'll be back Sunday or so. Hopefully, I'll get a chance to draw or something while I'm there and I can put up new arts. I'll see you guys soon! *collectively hugs everyone*
Comments (2) | Permalink

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Chapters Six and Seven
Well, be warned. This may be messed up a bit, since we rearranged things a lot. If you see anything that doesn't make sense, help me out.

Chapter Six

Ishtar and Duzell sat down, trying not to get frosting, jell-o, and other less identifiable substances on the chairs. Which proved to be nearly impossible, but Mitzy and Chrissy agreed that it was the thought that counted. Mitzy and Chrissy also sat down carefully.
“Let me guess,” said Mitzy. “You are having identity problems because no one can tell you from your twin, am I right?”
Duzell and Ishtar looked at each other. “Actually,” said Ishtar, “I came here to hide from my bodyguard, Darres. Although now that you mention it, Duzie could use a little therapy, I think.”
“Wait a sec! I thought you said you had relations here! You didn’t say they were shrinks!”
Ishtar smiled. “Um, yeah…they’re distant cousins or aunts, or something.”
Duzell glared. “Ishtar, you had better not even try suggesting I seduce them.”
Mitzy and Chrissy both turned bright red.
“Don’t worry,” said Ishtar. “I wasn’t going to. I know you like Illsaide.”
Duzell spluttered. “I do not!” he yelled.
“Whatever. Maybe if you just ask nice they’ll let you bite them,” Ishtar said in a stage whisper.
“Um, hey?” Mitzy asked, rather nervous. “Maybe we should try word association or something now?”
Ishtar grinned. “Sounds like fun!”
Mitzy nodded, and decided to try to stick with safer words.
“Animals?” she asked.
“Duzie!” Ishtar yelled, glomping Duzell. Duzell growled.
Duzell glared moodily.
Mitzy gave him a look, but continued anyway. “Family?”
“Falan!” said Ishtar.
“Don’t have one.”
Chrissy asked, “You have no blood relations at all?”
“Oh, I have a few blood relations…” Duzell said, grinning and showing fangs. Chrissy went pale and shut up quickly.
“Eheheheh. Um, next word? Uh, love?” Mitzy asked, sweatdrops all over her forehead.
“Darres!” Ishtar said, then clapped a hand over her mouth.
“Hunting down Phelios’ reincarnation then ripping out his internal organs and dancing in his entrails,” said Duzell. “What?” he asked, looking at the two shrinks faces.
“You’ve been watching Eva again, haven’t you, Duzie?” she asked. To the shrinks she whispered, “He really likes Kaworu, especially that one bath scene.”
Duzell practically screamed, “I do NOT! Geez, why do you always have to make me seem gayer than I already look?”
Ishtar whispered again to the shrinks, “I think he’s in denial.”
Chrissy nodded. “Maybe getting him to talk will tell us his problem…er, problems.” To Duzell she said, “Now why don’t you tell us about you life?”
“Lives,” Duzell said. “Plural.”
Chrissy nodded understandingly. “Yes, tell us about your lives. We’ll listen.” To herself, she added, ‘If you don’t freak us out or try to bite us…’ She looked at Mitzy and knew she was thinking the same thing.
Duzell sighed. “Ok, it’s like this. I was a big powerful mean vampire dude who was bored and wanted to fight with humans, because, let’s face it, they’re fun to play with. But then some mysterious stuff happened that no one seems clear on and I ended up getting killed by this girl’s great grandfather. So I swear revenge on his soul and I get reincarnated and I go around biting people to find him and turning into Ishtar’s twin so much that sometimes I act like a girl and stuff and so Ishtar keeps trying to hook me up with guys who aren’t even my type and…yeah. I think that about covers it. Oh, yeah, my other form, not the big mean vampire one, is a cute widdle kitty. Or so says Ishtar.”
“You left out the part about accepting a marriage proposal from another guy,” Ishtar pointed out.
“Oh, that brings me to my other other… other problem. ISHTAR THINKS I’M GAAAAAY!”
Complete silence filled the room, but snickering could be heard in the waiting room.
“Ok, then…” said Mitzy uncertainly. However, she didn’t get a chance to finish because at that moment, a loud voice yelled something to the effect of, “GET YOUR [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] OUT HERE RIGHT NOW BEFORE I COME IN THERE AND SPANK YOU IN FRONT OF ALL YOU’RE LITTLE FRIENDS!!”
Ishtar squeaked. “Duzie, quick! Be a kitty again!”
Duzell suddenly disappeared, replaced by a ‘cute widdle kitty’.
“Awwwww! How cute!” Chrissy yelled, picking him up. He bit her hard on the hand.
“Owie! He bit me!” Chrissy whimpered as Duzell changed back into human form.
“She isn’t even remotely related to you, you liar!” Duzell yelled at Ishtar. Belatedly, he realized that he was now in human form, and his human clothes were still on the floor. He squeaked and changed back.
Chrissy, still covering her eyes, asked “Is it safe now?” Mitzy, who had been about to slap the ecchi, nodded. That had been one of the more unique happenings in the office that day, and that was definitely saying something.
Suddenly, a sword impaled the door, removing it from its hinges. A tall young man in a warrior’s outfit stood there frowning at Ishtar. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you! Vord thought you had gone back to Ci Xeneth to teach the monsters how to make jell-o!” An older woman, er, man…person walked in behind the guard. “Darres, you know she only does this to get attention,” he/she/it said.
“I know, Yujinn, but don’t you think this is going a little far? I mean, when you have to come all the way out here to this fanfic to find her and get hit on by strange, bald women-“
“That wasn’t a woman, and I fixed his hair,” said Yujinn. “He’s actually rather pretty now.”
Duzell and Darres shuddered and moved away.
Darres grabbed Ishtar’s hand and dragged her away. Duzell, still a kitty, went after them, followed by Yujinn, a confused Mitzy, and a still bleeding Chrissy.

Bonus Chapter– Chrissy vs. Mitzy OR Why Kaworu isn’t in This Fic
(Chrissy is typing Character List)
Chrissy: Ka..wo..ru… Mineminemine…
Mitzy (looking over Chrissy’s shoulder): Hey, waitaminit! Kaworu’s mine!
Chrissy (glare): No, he isn’t.
Mitzy (glares back): Yes, he is.
Chrissy: You already have Duo.
Mitzy: So? You have Dark!
Chrissy: No, Britty does. Kaworu is mine.
Mitzy: You wanna fight? Huh? Huh? Do ya?
Chrissy: Bring it, punk!
Mitzy: GRAAAAAA!!!

DUE TO THE GRAPHIC NATURE OF THIS SCENE, READER DISSECTION IS ADVISED.
ON SECOND THOUGHT, WE’LL JUST CENSOR IT. YOU CAN STILL SEE THE FIGHT ON PAY-PER-VEIW, THOUGH.

AND…WE’RE BACK!

Chrissy (panting): Mine.. you old… hussy!
Mitzy: Mine, you… two-timing…dog!
Chrissy: I’m not… two-timing…anyone!
Mitzy: You have… other characters!
Chrissy: So… do you!
Mitzy: But I like Kaworu!
Chrissy: Well, he likes me!
Mitzy: That’s not what he told me last night!
Britty: Guys? You do realize that you are arguing over a FICTIONAL CHARACTER?!
Chrissy and Mitzy (gasp): How dare you say that?!
Britty: (rolls eyes) Could you at least settle the dispute a bit more maturely?
Chrissy and Mitzy (pout): Fine.
Mitzy: You can have him Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Chrissy: But you’d have him four days!
Mitzy: Well you’d have him Friday nights!
Chrissy: Grrrrr…
Mitzy: Grrrr…You wanna fight again?!
Chrissy: Yeah, I’ll whip you like last time!

THIS SCENE CENSORED DUE TO VIOLENCE, BLOOD, GUTS, AND GENERAL GORE (NOT AL).
WE WILL RETURN SHORTLY…WE HOPE.



Chapter Seven – Madness Takes its Toll

Darres stopped suddenly at the entrance to the waiting room, causing a five-person-one-cat pileup behind him. From their place in the squished mess, Chrissy and Mitzy could hear music coming from the waiting room, as well as many voices singing along. Chrissy looked at Mitzy, worried. Mitzy looked back at Chrissy, smiling happily as she wiggled out of the pileup and went to join whatever fun was being had in the waiting room.
By the time Ishtar, Duzell, and Chrissy had untangled themselves from Darres and Yujinn (who, Chrissy noted, wasn’t trying very hard to get untangled from Darres…) the party was in full swing. All five stared in horror at the scene before them. Madness was taking its toll.
Flueky’s computer was blaring out the “Time Warp”, and everyone in the room was dancing to it. Most had mop or broom partners, though a few were dancing with each other. The Gundam boys had their arms linked dancing in a line. Satoshi and Daisuke were jumping to the left, Nuriko, Miroku and Sango were stepping to the right, Hideki and Chi had their hands on their hips and their knees in tight, and everyone seemed to be going insane. Matt and Duo were standing on the receptionist’s desk, dancing and singing like there was no tomorrow. Flueky was looking around as though they were all crazy, yelling something about having her computer hijacked. Someone had broken out a few bottles of wine, Chrissy didn’t know who, but most everyone seemed to be a least a little tipsy. Mitzy was dancing along with everyone else, seemingly more drunk than any of them, even though Chrissy knew she didn’t drink.
Chrissy felt something hit her leg and looked down. Duzell, still in cat form, was Time Warping on her foot. Yujinn and Darres had finally gotten back on their feet, and Chrissy could see the music was affecting them as well. NO! It was having some kind of weird, psychological effect on them all! Chrissy ran over with her trusty hammer and put an end to the evil music. She turned back to the room, looking around to make sure everyone was ok. They were all staring at her. Not really suprising, considering she was wielding a hammer, had just brutally murdered Flueky’s computer, and was now covered in computer entrails.
A drunken Flueky crawled over to her poor, mutilated computer, crying over her lost Weaver pictures.
Chrissy brushed some monitor glass off her pants and grabbed Mitzy’s arm. “Matt, can you fix our door? Oh, and we can take the next-“ she started. She didn’t get to finish, though, because just then, a really, really mad-looking girl stormed through the doorway.
“WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CAR?! YOU SHALL PAAAAAAY!” she roared.
Mitzy and Chrissy grabbed Ed and attempted to hide behind him, which was difficult because he was so short. (Ed’s note: I AM NOT SHORT!)
The girl’s eyes locked onto them as she came toward them with her murderous gaze. “You had better pay for my car, or I swear I’ll…” she threatened.
“We will! We’ll fix it, we promise!” squeaked Mitzy and Chrissy in unison.
“Okies! My name is Britty,” said the girl. “Let’s all be friends!”
Chrissy and Mitzy gave her a nervous glance, then decided it would be better to have her as a friend than an enemy.
“Yay! We can all shrink together!” Britty smiled and stood on a table. “NEXT PATIENT!” she yelled. Chrissy and Mitzy exchanged looks that clearly said Britty was the one in need of a shrink.
The three shrinks (a/n: Britty has an honorary shrink license at this point) returned to the waiting room, which was oddly quiet at this point, and looked for their next patient. They found her…him, him, we mean, fighting with Darres over the Duzell-kitty.
“Nuriko-san? It’s your turn…” Chrissy said, nudging his shoulder. Nuriko only growled and held Duzell tighter to him. Darres glared and pulled Duzell back.
“Mine!” they both yelled simultaneously, and suddenly they were playing tug-o-war with a cranky reincarnated vampire-cat. Mitzy quickly grabbed a dictionary and thwacked Nuriko and Darres over the head. Both clutched their bruised craniums and dropped Duzell. Chrissy and Britty glanced at the new dachshund kitty and wondered if they could claim it as a new species, then turned their attention to the injured patients.
“You know, Mitzy, hitting a psychologically disturbed person in the head may not be the best treatment you could offer,” Britty said sarcastically.
“How do you know? Might knock some sense into them,” Mitzy said, still waving the dictionary threateningly in Darres and Nuriko’s general direction. “Now,” she said to Nuriko, “Will you come with us quietly or do I have to beat you into unconsciousness and drag you back myself?”
“Um, Mitzy? Violent much?” squeaked Chrissy.
Mitzy gave an evil glare. Chrissy meeped and hid behind Britty, who was already hiding behind Matt.
The two nervous shrinks crept along behind Mitzy and Nuriko, who had opted to stay conscious. As they passed Ishtar, who was still trying to avoid Darres, Mitzy called out, “You can’t take her back yet, Darres. We haven’t given her the results yet.” Darres groaned, still holding his head, and grumbled something about an angry Sir Keld.

Comments (1) | Permalink

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Chapter Five
And the next chapter of our fanfic. I'm only putting one chapter up this time since it's a fairly long chapter. Tell me if I'm putting too much up everyday, ok? And corrections. Lemme know any corrections that need fixing.

Chapter Five – Fun with Food

Chrissy was in the waiting room, holding on to Duzell’s arm. Duzell himself was looking a little ill. Mitzy took pity on him and pulled Chrissy away. The waiting room was still at a relatively high level of chaos, when there was a knock on the door. Mitzy and Chrissy ran over. Food! They held the door open for the snack deliveryman. It was Matt, a former patient. His old psychologist had given up after two sessions, but he still hung around the office, making himself useful when he could. He made a useful guard, with his unkempt hair, black wings, and horns. People were too afraid to break in.
He always handed out the snacks with a smile, albeit a psychotic one. He did so now as he talked to Mitzy and Chrissy. “So, how’s work going?” he asked.
“Same old, same old,” Mitzy said as she snatched up her seventh bag of M&Ms. “You?”
“Things are going swell. I’m making a new Star Wars movie, and I haven’t caused anyone any major injuries at all this week.”
“That’s great!” said Chrissy, munching a fudge brownie.
The rest of the waiting room was quite now, except for the crunching and chewing sounds that all anime characters make when eating. That didn’t last long however.
“FOOD FIGHT! Heads up, Quatre!” yelled Duo as he hurled a Snickers at the blonde man across from him. The candy bar smacked Quatre in the nose, and he quickly retaliated with a fistful of Skittles, some of which missed and rained onto a young-ish boy’s head. “Sorry, Daisuke!” Quatre yelled. His mom, seeing she was in no shape to defend himself, threw a honey-bun at Quatre. He ducked and the bun went sailing over his head. It hit Nuriko, who was still tightly attached to Duzell. “Ishtar! I could use some help!” he yelled at his twin. At this point, all hell broke loose. Nuriko gathered a handful of snacks from the cart and began hurling them with enough force to put holes in the walls… and other patients. Hideki took a Starburst to the forehead and fell. Chi poked him, looking confused.
Chrissy jumped onto a chair. “ORDER! ORDER IN THE COURT!”
Ed jumped up. “I’ll take a nutty-buddy…in your face!” he yelled as he chucked one at Chrissy. The snack nailed her in the left eye. Thankfully, her glasses stopped it from doing any real damage. However, now she was pissed. With a growl, she hurled a jelly doughnut at Ed.
Ed ducked and the doughnut fell into Duzell’s lap. The twins simultaneously jumped up and entered the fight. Mitzy stood by the side, trying to talk reason into the psychos, including her co-worker, when a cupcake plopped onto her head. All thoughts of reasoning with her patients left her mind as she armed herself with a bag of Tostitos and began throwing them Frisbee-style around the room. One of the Frisbee-Tostitos hit Flueky as she peeked over her desk. Flueky, who had always had something of a temper, lost it and entered the fight as well. Matt had been throwing food all along, and he and Flueky teamed up against Chrissy and Mitzy, while all the patients seemed to be fighting indiscriminately. Behind up-turned table, the Gundam pilots were actively engaged in the battle. “Watch it , Trowa!” Quatre yelled. He shoved his friend aside and lobbed a glob of jell-o at Mitzy, who retaliated by climbing over the table and pouring a large box of nerds down the back of his pants. Heero shot Sango in the forehead with a marshmallow from his gun, causing her to fall backwards and land butt-first in large coconut cream pie. The mother who had come in with her son was attempting to strangle Satoshi with a Fruit by the Foot while growling that she’d never let him arrest her little boy. Her son was trying to make her understand that while he didn’t want to be arrested, he didn’t want her to murder anyone, especially not with a food he happened to like. The fight came to a halt when Nuriko grabbed the entire food cart and swung it across the room, knocking out the majority of the fighters in the process. Chrissy took Nuriko down with a well-aimed Hershey Kiss, and the two shrinks assessed the damage.
Miroku was trying to feel up Sango, using the whipped cream on her rear as an excuse. Nuriko had collapsed onto Duzell, and was refusing to get off. Ishtar was trying not to step in anything while attempting to get Nuriko off him. All the Gundam pilots were still behind the overturned table, which was covered in splattered foodstuff. Their only casualties appeared to be Quatre, from the Snickers, and Heero’s gun, which had somehow gotten a jumbo Tootsie Roll jammed in the barrel. Heero was cradling it and glaring at anyone who came near. Ed was attempting to remove a Skittle from his nose, and Chi was systematically picking cupcake sprinkles out of Hideki’s hair. Matt and Flueky were munching on various M&Ms and Skittles from the floor.
The room, needless to say, was a complete wreck. Magazines covered the floor, chair and end tables were overturned and everything was covered in food. Several cupcakes and doughnuts were stuck to the ceiling and walls.
And the poor shrinks, Mitzy and Chrissy, were not in great shape either. Chrissy had an M&M or two in one ear and the shape of a nutty-buddy ingrained in her face. Mitzy had frosting in her hair and on her face, and was trying, without success, to reach it with her tongue.
Chrissy gave a final shake of her head, sending the M&Ms flying from her ear, hitting Mitzy in the process.
“Now, can we please have the next patient?” Chrissy asked, smiling like the lunatic that she was.
“ME! I’LL GO!” yelled Duzell, crawling across the floor with Nuriko hanging onto his ankle. Ishtar stepped in to help, calling out an weird foreign language. Nuriko promptly went completely bald. He screamed and let go of Duzell long enough to yell something to the effect of, “My beautiful hair! You’re gonna get it, you hag!” On the other side of the room, Duo shuddered and moved as far away from Ishtar as he could.
“Ooops,” said Ishtar. “I only meant to electrocute him a little. My bad!” She grabbed Duzell’s hand and followed the shrinks, leaving a sobbing, bald Nuriko behind.
As they left, Mitzy turned and shouted, “When we get back, this room had better be spotless or it’s ‘Omae o korosu’ for all of you!”
Duo, who had pretty much started the entire thing, squeaked out a “Yes, Ma’am!”

Comments (3) | Permalink

Monday, March 21, 2005

Next part!
Sorry it took so long for the next part. Technical difficulties, ya know? Eheheh. Anyway. Without further ado...

Chapter Three continued
Once they were in the office, Mitzy locked the door. “Now,” she said calmly, “Why don’t you tell us your problem?”
Edward, who was being forcibly restrained in a chair by Chrissy, growled, “What problem? I don’t have a problem.”
Chrissy and Mitzy exchanged glances. “We think you do,” said Chrissy. “Oh, yes,” said Mitzy, “You most definitely have problems. Now, I’ll say a word, and you say the first thing that comes to mind, ok?
Ed glared.
“Temper,” said Mitzy.
“My temper is fine.”
“Life?”
“Can’t be created.”
“Family?”
“Al.”
“Fire?”
“My house.”
“Hand?”
“Metal.”
“Short?”
“AM NOT!”
Mitzy finished taking the notes. “Well, I think we know what the problem is. Now, let’s find out why.”
Chrissy let go of Ed, who was now thoroughly tied to the chair. “I’m going to swing this watch, and you are going to watch it closely.”
“Hey! That’s MY watch!” Ed shouted.
“Shhh. Just watch the watch. Waaaatch the waaatch…” Chrissy said, swinging the State Alchemist’s watch in front of his face.
“Now, tell us about your life. When did the problems start?” Chrissy asked.
“When that freak out there called me pipsqueak and you guys kidnapped me.”
“Um, how about a little earlier than that?” Chrissy suggested, holding Mitzy at bay. The shrink was about to kill the patient for calling Duo, whom she obviously had a crush on, a freak.
“Um, well. My dad left us. My mom died because she missed him, and I made her flowers, and people called me short, and we tried to resurrect our mom, and I almost killed my brother, and I lost my arm and leg, but Winry made me some automail, so now I have a kick-ass arm and leg, but my brother is a suit of armor, and-“
“Ok, ok.” Chrissy said, pocketing the watch. “I think that’s fine for now. You may wait for us in the waiting room,” she said after she untied him.
Ed stumbled out of the room in a daze. Chrissy made a gesture indicating the guy was a basket case, and Mitzy nodded. “The world’s full of ‘em,” she said. “Which is a good thing. More money for people like us.”

Bonus Chapter – The Day the Muse Died
Chrissy: (sobs)
Mitzy: What’s wrong?
Chrissy: My… my muse disappeared!! (sobs harder)
Britty: Did she just say her moose is gone?
Mitzy: (whispers) No, her muse, m-u-s-e. It’s the little creature that gives her inspiration, helps her creative juices get going.
Britty: Ohhhh. What’s it look like?
Mitzy: Kinda like this:

Britty: o.O EEEP!
Mitzy: Just kidding. You have one too.
Britty: I do?
Mitzy: (nodnod) You just have to know what it looks like.
Britty: And that would be?
Mitzy: This.

Britty: ^__^ Ohhh, yeah, I think I’ve seen her under my bed.
Mitzy: Yep, and there’s mine.

Britty: O.o Figures.
Mitzy: And Matt’s.
Britty: I’m afraid to ask, but what’s Matt’s?
Mitzy: Oh, just this.

Britty: o.O;
Mitzy: And Breanne’s

Britty: It looks like they have about the same taste, huh?
Mitzy: Then there’s Flueky’s.

Britty: Yup, no surprise there.
Mitzy: no, not really. And Darke’s.

Britty: Cute ^_^
Mitzy: Yup.
Britty: But what is Chrissy’s, then?
Mitzy: This one

Chrissy: (jumps up) YOU FOUND HER!!! (huggles her)
Muse: X_X
Mitzy: It’s no wonder it ran away…
Britty: Yup…


Chapter Four – A Computer Obsession

Chrissy and Mitzy entered the waiting room with caution this time. They checked with the receptionist, a brunette named Flueky, to see if anyone else had checked in. Sure enough, a Satoshi Hikaru had checked in. They spied the newcomer glaring at the young boy who had come in with his mother. The boy looked nervous, probably because his mother was glaring knives, daggers and other sharp objects at the boy who was staring at him. Mitzy took the list of names from Flueky, who was drooling on her keyboard while looking at pictures of her online boyfriend.
Suddenly, there was a scream. “You’re a guy?!?!” one of the twins on the couch yelled. The purple haired lady, or, well, everyone else thought it was a lady, looked at the twin. “It’s not like you need to worry, I’m not interested in girls.”
“I’m not a girl!” The twin yelled back. The other twin looked up. “Um, Duzie?”
Belatedly, Duzie realized that that might not have been the smartest thing to tell her, er…him, just as the dude who looked like a lady glomped him. “Nuriko… get off me!!!” he yelled.
Mitzy and Chrissy looked at each other, both thinking this was getting very interesting.
“Um, Hideki and Chi? No last names…” Chrissy looked around the room. The magazine reader from earlier stood up. “That’s us,” he told the blonde girl with funny ears.

Chrissy and Mitzy managed to get the two patients into the room with no problems.
“Now, what seems to be the problem?”
The blonde girl piped in. “Hideki is average-sized!”
Both Mitzy and Chrissy turned an interesting shade of red.
“Chi! I told you not to say that!” yelled Hideki.
“Ah…um… If that’s the problem, I think there are other doctors you should… um… talk to,” said Mitzy. Chrissy nodded.
“Nononono!” yelled Hideki. “That’s not the problem! I mean, I am, but- Argh! I’m in love with my computer!”
Chi glomped the average-sized Hideki. “Hideki loves Chi!”
Mitzy raised an eyebrow. “Sooo, she’s a computer.”
Chrissy jumped up. “Chi! Can you search for cute single guys around here?”
Chi nodded. “Chi thinks there are some in the waiting room.”
Hearing this, Chrissy dashed out of the room, leaving a confused Mitzy to counsel the two lovebirds…love-processors?
Mitzy sighed, then jumped up on her desk. “If you two love each other, go for it! Who cares if others make fun of you or think you’re a sick bastard who can’t find a real chick?! Who cares if they beat you up and burn down your house! YOU SHOULD BE FREE TO LOVE!!! Besides, you and Chi are really cute.”
Hideki and Chi hastily made their way back to the waiting room, afraid of what the shrink might say next, or what Chi might repeat. Mitzy shrugged and went to find her co-worker.

Bonus Chapter – The Gundam Pilots Decide to go to Therapy
(Heero, Duo, Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei are sitting outside, enjoying the sun)
Duo: Hey, Heero…Do you ever feel like ripping out random people’s entrails?
All: o.o
Heero: Yes.
Duo: Think it might be because of the war?
Heero: Hn.
Quatre: I randomly feel like wearing my sisters’ dresses.
Trowa: Same here.
Quatre: Catherine doesn’t have a dress that will fit you.
Trowa: I know. That’s why I’m not wearing one right now.
Quatre: Ah.
Wufei: You know, I’m beginning to think the fanfics are right.
Quatre, Trowa: What, about you liking Duo?
Wufei: -_-+ NO!
(Quatre and Wufei giggle)
Relena: What’s so funny?
Duo: Heero wants to rip out people’s entrails, Quatre and Trowa want to wear dresses, and Wufei is in love with me.
Wufei: I AM NOT!
Relena: I think it’s time for a visit to the therapist.
Duo: Hey, did you ever notice? If you put a space in therapist, it’s the rapist.
Quatre: I don’t wanna go to the rapist!
Relena: Well, I think you need to!
(After a brief scuffle, Relena reappears, dragging four squirming burlap bags behind her.)
Relena: You may have escaped this time Wufei, but I will get you next time!


Comments (5) | Permalink

Friday, March 18, 2005

Next Chapters!
Alrighty, this is a bit messed up. I'm cutting chapter three kinda in the middle, cuz that was supposed to be a chapter break anyway. It's not very long today. Tomorrow, I'll post the rest of chapter three and four.

Chapter Two – Perverts and Demon Slayers

Once inside the counseling room, Chrissy, Mitzy, and the patients, whose names were Miroku and Sango, sat down.
“So…” began Chrissy. “Inkblot?” she asked Mitzy. Mitzy nodded and held up a card. “What do each of you see?” she asked.
Sango answered first. “An evil demon.”
Miroku looked surprised. “Really? I think it’s a beautiful woman.”
Sango glared at him. Chrissy and Mitzy shared nervous glances, wondering if they were about to witness a murder. “Um, Inkblot 2!” She said quickly, holding up the second card.
Sango, distracted for the moment, looked at the card. “It’s my brother!” She yelled, snatching the card from Mitzy. Mitzy sweatdropped. “Word association?” she suggested.
Chrissy nodded. “Um, I’ll say a word, and you guys say the first thing that comes to your mind, ok?” Sango nodded, still hugging the inkblot.
“Life,”
“Slaying demons,” said Sango.
“Women,” said Miroku.
“Love?”
“Revenge,” said Sango.
“Women,” said Miroku.
“Hobby?”
“Training,” said Sango.
“Picking up women,” said Miroku.
“Sadness?”
“My brother,” said Sango.
“No women,” said Miroku.
Mitzy and Chrissy looked at each other. “You may return to the waiting room for a break.”

Bonus Chapter – Bloopers and Blunders
(1)
(offscreen, in the waiting room)
(Mitzy and Chrissy walk in)
Chrissy: Heya Flueky. Watcha doing? (glances at the computer)
Mitzy: O.O; Eeep!
Flueky: Hey! Go away!
Chrissy: Geez, how do they get into those positions?
Mitzy: That looks painful…
Flueky: Quit looking over my shoulders!
Chrissy: Ok, ok…I still think those circus contortionists would break some bones…
Mitzy: Yeah…Hey, tell me that camera isn’t recording.

(2)

(Mitzy is driving)
SPLAT!
Chrissy: Do you just hate mailboxes?!
Mitzy: … That…wasn’t a mailbox…
Chrissy: o.o; What was it…?
Mitzy: OMG! It was Darke!
(Darke in 3 ½ in form is plastered on the windshield)
Darke: Ouch…
Mitzy: OMG! We need to get him to the vet!
Chrissy: Vet?! He’s not a pet!
Mitzy: Well, would a doctor be able to treat a chibi Darke?
Chrissy: I don’t know!
(Darke is hanging on to the windshield wiper)
Darke: Not to interrupt, but I’m sliding off the windshield here! (Mitzy is still driving)
Mitzy: Oh, sorry! (slams on brakes)
(Darke fliesssss…)
(Thump.)
Chrissy: o.o; Um, maybe we should just call 911…
Mitzy: I can’t! I don’t know the number!
Chrissy: How can you not know the number? It’s just 9 and 11!
Mitzy: There’s no 11 on this phone!!!
Darke: x.x Owie… Can I have a scotch? Or a Tylenol? Or both?
(a/n: Darke is a friend of mine on theO, in case you didn't know.)

Chapter Three – Alchemic Anger Management

Back in the waiting room, there was a crash of glass as two unidentified men came through the door, quite literally. Both had braids, but that was about as far as the resemblance went. One was relatively tall, with a black cap and a braid that reached to his knees. Chrissy glanced at Mitzy, who was visibly drooling. She gently pushed Mitzy’s jaw back into place. The other, a blonde in a red coat was chasing the first in circles, apparently intending him great bodily injury. Meanwhile, the other patients were watching the spectacle with great interest.
“Geez, chill out! I didn’t mean to insult your itty-bitty ego!” yelled the brown-haired one as he ducked behind the patient with the gun. Mitzy and Chrissy wondered if this was really a very safe hiding place. “Heero, help me out here! And where’s Wufei?”
The man with the gun, Heero apparently, casually aimed the gun at the guy behind him. “You’re late, Duo,” he said coldly, “and Wufei managed to escape. Lucky b******” Heero held Duo’s attacker at bay with one hand, while still keeping Duo at gunpoint.
“Gomenasai! I didn’t mean to be so late!” Duo shouted over the string of curses the braided blonde was shouting. “ Some crazy person’s car was parked across the only three open spots!”
Chrissy looked over at Mitzy sternly, while Mitzy mumbled a barely audible “Oops.”
“Ummmm…We can take the next patient now.” Chrissy called. Mitzy piped up. “In fact, I think we can take the short one there.”
At this, the blonde seemed to lose it. “Do not call me SHORT! My name is Edward Elric! You know, the Fullmetal Alchemist?”
Mitzy and Chrissy looked at each other. “Can’t say we’ve ever heard of you, sorry,” said Mitzy.
“But I think some anger management counseling could do you a world of good,” Chrissy finished.
And so the two psychiatrists dragged him into counseling.

Comments (4) | Permalink