Tuesday, June 6, 2006

   Guess What I've Been Doing...
A-hem.

I'm a freak. But I love Zack.

Old habits die hard, I guess...
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   When Chibis Attack! Part 36
Lost? Confused? Try reading the previous chapters.

Part 36: In Which There is Drama

"Creature!" Kougaiji's authoritative little voice resounds from on high...ish. It makes my hair stand on end. "Have you chosen to side with Sanzo and his band of thugs?"

"Yarg!" I elocute with precision my dismay and confusion.

"Yay! She's on our team!" Goku is looking forward to the impending catastrophe. Never a good sign.




"No, no, no!" Gojyo shushes him. "You know how it goes - the side with the least people always wins. You should be on his team, and she can be, too... and maybe we should tie up Sanzo and stuff him in the stove..."

"I'm not on a team!" I feel like a bystander at a rugby game who's accidentally wandered on field and caught the ball. "Dammit, why do we need teams? What the hell happened? Hakkai!"

Grab Hakkai. Take cover behind counter.




Hakkai takes a little black notebook out of his pocket. The word "Diary" is written on the front, and it is secured by a heart-shaped lock.

Hakkai fiddles with the key.

"Before he burns the place down, please." Motivate him to haste. "My place. Where I keep all my stuff."

"Right, yes. Once second. Ah!" He finally gets the little book open and puts on his glasses.




"Whatever plan you are devising will not succeed! My will is strong, and I will not fail." Kougaiji hollers.

It's... just not right. Not... cute.

"There's some cookies on the counter. Help yourself, while I do a quick re-cap." Hakkai counters.

"Ha! Such an old trick. I'll stay right where I am, thank you." The voice retreats a little.




Refuses cookies?

"...the hell?" I mumble.

"Hm. And they're fresh, you know. Chocolate." Hakkai ponders the situation.



Stare.



"Oh. Right." Hakkai returns to the planet of Not Cookies. "Yes. It says right here: In chapter Eighteen... um, I mean, on the eighteenth, a-hem, ha ha... Sanzo gave Kougaiji a bottle with 'Drink Me' written on it in very curly, plot-suggestive letters."

"Why?"

Hakkai fidgets self-consciously: "Because he's a big meany?"

"Damn straight." Sanzo mutters over his newspaper. His coffee cup has an excessively fluffy kitten on it.




Sigh.




"Point taken. So, the drink did this?"

"One can only assume. If I were wearing the little lab coat, I might say that it appears to have de-cutified his personality, while leaving him adorable in appearance."



Risk a furtive glance over the counter. Fluffy hair: Check. Big Eyes: Check. The fireball even has little glittery bits in it.

Crap! He spotted me!

"You there! Stand and make your first move. My mission is of utmost importance. I cannot afford to waste any more time!"

...but he really has lost his cute. Poor little guy.




"Okay, okay... just a sec." I issue an official reply. Stand slowly, muttering at Hakkai: "How do I fix it?"

"Ah ha ha ha..." Oh, no. The Laugh, again. I'm Doomed. "I wish I knew. I'm afraid all my little test tubes are with the lab coat, so I can't even guess."

Don't even think about the logic of that one.

I guess I'm on my own, then.

Me vs. Kougaiji, Round One!


CB says: Don't worry. Just... don't worry. He'll be okay. But you knew Kougaiji had to have a personality change at least once, right? Just to maintain some distant tie to the manga?

Cuteness Will Prevail!
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Wednesday, May 31, 2006

   When Chibis Attack! Part 35
Previous Chapters are archived here. They may be helpful, since there's some plot in this chapter. Unbelievable, I know.

Part 35: In Which a Plot Surprisingly Appears

Hakkai's right about afternoon naps. Or midday naps. General periods of unconsciousness: it's all good.

Strange, to wake up gently. No pounding headache, no alarm ringing, no smell of smoke, or even shouting. If someone brought me coffee in bed now, this would be the third best day of my life.



Wait patiently.

Looks like I'll have to get my own coffee. Oh well.




Where are those little buggers, anyway? Usually they're in my face the moment I wake up. Quite the delay in action, here.

Maybe they've gone.



I'm sure they would have said goodbye first. Kougaiji would, anyway. Probably with tears, and a lovely card. Hakkai, too. It's the polite thing to do.

They can't have gone.



And even if they have, that would be fine. I doubt that any real trouble will come from this morning's brush with mental health, but still... I don't want to get caught harboring pint-sized fugitives.

They're a pain in the ass. I hope they're gone.

Either way, I hope someone made coffee.





Voices from the kitchen. Not gone, then.

Funny, isn't it, how sometimes you don't realize how tense you are until you suddenly relax?

So, what's in the kitchen that's more important than annoying me?




"If we must join forces to escape this bizarre prison, then so be it: I will work alongside you on this occasion. But make no mistake, Sanzo Party, I will never give up my obligation to take that Sutra!"

Who the hell is that?




"Well, who says we want to work with you?" Gojyo is visible even from the hall, sitting in the fruit bowl, picking his nose. He flicks it toward the speech-giver. "You're no fun, anyway."

"Fun? Fun. You truly have no sense of the magnitude of the issues involved, do you? For all of us, the whole world is waiting to see which group will bring about the future. Yet, all you can think about is -"




Poke head around corner.

"Who the hell is that?" Chibis on the counter may know. They're better armed than usual, which is to say that Gojyo has acquired a complicated scythe-thingy that appears to be Nerf in nature. He swings the orange foam crescent idly back and forth, and stops picking his nose long enough to point at the fridge.




The fridge isn't speaking. Fridges don't talk.

"Ye gods!" cries the fridge. "What is that?"

On the other hand, I suppose a human being may seem to be a bit of an oddity to a talking fridge. I've never thought of it from the fridge's perspective before.

"Hello, Mr. Fridge... or Refrigerator, whichever you prefer..." Should we shake handles?

"Up, you silly old sot." Sanzo points above the fridge.

Which makes more sense than a talking fridge. But then, who am I to say?



Stand on toes. Look on top of fridge.

Lock eyes with -



Kougaiji.



"Oh." I eloquently observe. "Hello, little guy."

Just Kougaiji. No problem here.

"What manner of creature... it's not a shikigami, but so enormous!" He pokes my nose with a rather pointy finger.




"Ouch." Rub my poked nose: Something's not right here. "What are you doing on top of the fridge, anyway? The cookies aren't up there."

"It speaks intelligibly. Hm... Perhaps this is an inhabitant of this strange land."

"Uh... and why are you talking to yourself?"

"He always does that," Hakkai answers for the orating Prince. "especially when there's Plot going on."




"Listen, oh Great Beast!" Kougaiji intones from Fridgetop. "I am Kougaiji, son of Gyumaoh. It is vital that I return to my kingdom. Assist me, and you will be rewarded. Hinder me, and you will pay."

A little ball of fire forms in his hand.





Oh God, I hope the man in that truck didn't get my plate number!




"Gah! Wait!" Grab a pot lid from the drying rack, and hold it up as a shield. "What's going on? Sanzo, what did you clowns do to him?"

Sanzo glances up at me from his seat on the kitchen table, where he has been reading, smoking, and presumably watching the fun.

"We de-squeaked him. Obviously."

"Well, re-squeak him, dammit! He's a fire hazard!"

"Ah ha ha ha..." Hakkai's Laugh of Impending Doom makes my heart sink.

"We're not quite sure how..."

---------------------
Brand New Fan Art for When Chibis Attack!

Rexhia over at Fanfiction.net did a gorgeous piece of Kougaiji and the Infamous Apple. She also has a deviantart.com account under the name Jirikira, but neither she nor I know how to link to it...

Go see the Adorable Cuteness!
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Friday, May 19, 2006

   Nocturnal Visitations
CB has been sick. Since CB is always sick, this means that CB is actually sicker, and therefore the following has no place in a well-organized society.

CB: My fever finally broke

Crowd: Yay!

CB: at 4:30AM.

Crowd: Huh?

CB: I think Sephiroth killed it. That's who I hallucinated I was fighting at the time.

Crowd: "..."

CB: ... he won.

Crowd: Gee, you think?

CB: But my fever broke, so that proves that he's a good guy at heart!

Crowd: - walks away, shaking its head -

CB: Of course, now I've lost my voice, and I can't hear in one ear. But that's the price you pay for taking on Sephiroth! Right guys? Guys?



=^O.o^=
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Monday, May 8, 2006

   When Chibis Attack! Part 34
The previous 33 chapters are over here.

Part 34: In Which There is Excitement
Garfield belongs to Jim Davis, and I don't have his permission. I am, however, fascinated by how a cat can stick to a window.

Driving.



I have to use my rear-view mirror. If I don't, I won't know when the cars behind me are going to pass and give me the finger.

That's important.

But they're so... distracting, back there. It's like their whole purpose in existing is to get my attention(#).

They're absolutely shameless.





Goku is impersonating a window sucker-plushie, though how he's managed to adhere himself to the window, I have no idea. Maybe he had a jam sandwich. The point is, any small children driven past are going to need very expensive therapy at some point in their later lives.

I can hear them now: "Mommy, look! That Garfield is going to eat us all!"

Gojyo has settled in for the trip, and has his Travelling Panties on his head. Or rather, my travelling panties. Though if we're pulled over, I will fiercely deny that.




But all of this is unimportant, next to the startling green color that Hakkai is turning. Even though he's generally a little green around the edges, I'm sure his skin is usually an adorable shade of pink, and not so...

"Hey, Hakkai? Are you going to be sick?" My mental Chibi Expression Translator finally catches on. On a busy road. With nowhere to pull over, let alone bushes to hide a nauseated chibi under.

"Ah ha ha - hrk!"

"Get him a bag! Dammit! Open the windows, NOW!"





Hakkai's gasping face floats in and out of my rear-view mirror as he is transported to fresh air.

"I told you not to read!" Gojyo's triumphant justification is overshadowed by his desire not to be puked on. "Stick your head out the window!"

"Don't!" I holler. Two large trucks pass me, one on each side. They are playing the truck version of the familiar old game, Schoolyard Bully.

Visions of a decapitated chibi turn me a little green as well.




"Terribly sorry!" An apology proves that Hakkai's head remains in one piece. Who else apologizes? "It's just what I found at the doctor's office. It's so interesting and - hrk!"

"Out the window!" Gojyo tries to aim him.

"Not out the window, damn you!" No headless chibis, thank you. None!




Desperate times call for desperate measures: Wake Sanzo, previously napping on the front seat.

"Trade with Hakkai!" It comes out as a shout. When will those trucks stop playing with me? It's starting to feel like Dodgeball. I hated Dodgeball.

"What? Hell no!" Sanzo is... his normal self.

"Trade! Now!" Please, go away, Mr. Truck. I don't want to be your extremely close friend.

"Who do you think you are, you big..."

"Front-page news, tomorrow's Chibi Times: 'Dead Sanzo Found in Puddle of Puke!' Trade! Now!"

"..." Sanzo seems astounded by my bout of prognostication.




"'Shocking Pictures of Puke-Covered Monk!'" Gojyo chimes in from the back seat. "Man, I'd pay a whole buck for that!"

Gojyo's just being helpful. Or he's just trying to get a shot in on Sanzo, which is understandable. It doesn't seem necessary to point out that he would be dead in the car wreck behind said vomitous monk, should those pictures ever print.

The trucks cut me off again.

For a fraction of a second, I'm glad I'm sober. But I don't want to die sober.




"So sorry... mrrf!" Hakkai's eyes have been replaced with swirls that bear no resemblance to eyes whatsoever. That's probably not helping his motion sickness. He staggers towards the front seat, emergency-bag in hand, small birds circling his head in tight formation.

Sanzo vacates the front seat, without a word, and with remarkable speed.

No one wants to be front-page puke news.





"You okay?" I can't look at Hakkai to check. We'll die if I look. I really don't want to die sober...

"Much... better... Oh my! That was close, wasn't it?"

"What's up?" Gojyo, if you're clinging to the back of my headrest, you are inadvertently inviting your own demise.




Somehow, when everything around you is moving terribly fast, something slow will catch your eye.

The Rear-View Mirror: A bird twitters up and away from the recovering Hakkai, to land on the finger of Kougaiji in the back window. He smiles at it peacefully.

Will he eat it?




Then there's nothing but engine fumes and roaring pipes and jerks in metal bodies weighing several tonnes.

"Just pass, damn you!" Shout as loud as possible, though there's no way the asshole beside me can hear over the sound of his own roaring ego. "Pass or die! Pass or get the hell off the road! Just go away, you... MONSTER!"

"I'll save you, Mummy!"





I am going to hell.

From now on, I refuse to believe in a fiery hell, because I don't want to go there, and Kougaiji just set fire to that man's truck.

I... think I was more surprised than he was.

That is, I don't think he had much time to be surprised, what with all that pulling over to the emergency lane, jumping out and running for cover.




I can't see the flames from his engine block in my rear-view mirror, anymore.

Just a little bird twittering away in my back window, and the chibis giving each other congratulatory High Fives over Kougaiji's excellent fireball aim.

Monster slaying. Bloody hell.



I... really need that drink.

--|--

And, after his successful monster-slaying defense of Mummy, Kougaiji is a little thirsty as well. He takes a tiny sip of Mummy's Special Drink. Not too much: it's Special.

Mummy, on the other hand, has a large sip of her own 'special drink' as soon as they're home. And passes out. Obviously it's nap-time.

Chibis love naps.




(#) - and not, say, to siphon cheap hits to some fanfiction webpage.

Once again, thanks to everyone who's read this and reviewed... it's seen 300 reviews and 11,000 hits! So, here's Sanzo's way of saying "Thanks!".
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Thursday, May 4, 2006

   I'm tired of being sick.
Anyone know a cure for the common cripple?





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Saturday, April 29, 2006

   Beautiful Morning With You...
But this isn's FLCL wallpaper... it's Saiyuki, as always. I'm actually using this as my current bg, while I work on the full color version.

I thought it was pretty...
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   Here it is, in glorious color!
Sanzo's Kitten Suit... in glorious color! I love the kitten suit.

Now, if only I can figure out how to do shading in illustrator - without foaming at the mouth.

=^@.@^=
Can't take it anymore...
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Friday, April 28, 2006

   I Love You, But I Hate Adobe.
I really do. I still can't figure out how to work half the stuff, I can't find the frigging eraser, and it took me half an hour to figure out how to save this in anything but an adobe proprietary format.

That, and my brother keeps telling me that if I was a real artist (you know, a gainfully employed one), I wouldn't give a damn about saving as a jpg, so it makes sense to hide the gosh darn save menu under something to do with web design.

'Cause, you know, people like me can't afford illustrator... unless we save for months.

But, you know...

300 reviews and 10,000 hits for When Chibis Attack!, and that's not counting all the nice things you've said to me over here! Man, I love you guys! And Sanzo does, too. He's just shy.

Suddenly, I feel a lot better.

Ah, rainbows and lollipops...

=^T.T^=
I'm so touched...
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Thursday, April 27, 2006

   Just to celebrate...
One good episode = one good wallpaper.

Took me 3 hours. Hope you like it.
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