Tuesday, October 18, 2005

   When Chibis Attack! Part 18
In Which... Uh... Yeah.

Previous chapters and spin-off can be found here


Well in to Mr.Pillow's dissertation on the benefits of midday nappage, the chibis get up to something.

Though not up to much, as they couldn't reach that high.



"What do you think is in it?"

"Who knows?"

"What are you idiots doing?" Sanzo takes a break from polishing his new gun to find out what the targets are up to.

"Hakkai found a bottle in the bathroom cupboard."

"What's so special about that?" Sanzo takes the bottle from Hakkai and squints at the label, then takes out his reading glasses.

"Drink...me..." He reads the label aloud. The words are inscribed in curly, plot-suggestive letters.




"What do you think it does, Sanzo?" Goku tries to read over his shoulder.

"How the hell should I know? What does it do, Hakkai?"

"I have no idea." Hakkai shrugs his round little shoulders. "There was nothing near it, and I'm sure it wasn't there yesterday when we looked for the way back."

"I bet it doesn't taste very good. Nothing you find under the sink does." Son Goku has learned a few things in his five-hundred-odd years of life, and sometimes he feels the need to share the gems with the youngsters.

"Thwack!" replies the wapping fan.

"Ow!"



A pause prolongs as they study the bottle.

"Well..." Hakkai begins, eventually. "I suppose we could test it on someone."

"We could give it to Goku. His stomach's lead-lined." Gojyo is happy to volunteer... someone else.

"What!" Goku dissents.

"Now, Gojyo," Hakkai interjects. "If it makes him sick, I'll have to put on the little doctor outfit, and you know the stethoscope hurts my ears..."

"Besides," Sanzo shakes the bottle vigorously and squints at it again. "If he does get sick, we'll have to carry his sorry ass all the way to Ten-Chibikkyu."

Goku supports this statement with nods. He nods faster and faster until Sanzo speaks again, at which time he stops, a little motion sick.

Sanzo tosses the bottle back to Hakkai,

"No, there's only one way to do this."

All big, sparkly eyes turn to Sanzo.

"We give it to Kougaiji,"






Kougaiji sits in a pool of sunlight on the floor of the front room. He noticed that his 'Mummy' wasn't feeling too well earlier, and apparently hugs weren't enough to set things right. Being a pro-active little Prince, he has set about making a truly worthy card using paper, felt pens, crayons, cotton balls, macaroni, paste and sparkles. Where he found the container of sparkles is anyone's guess. The cat may have given it to him.

As the Sanzo group look on, he has a slight accident with the sparkles, sending a handful flying into the air.

"Wheeee!"



"Go on Hakkai. Give it to him." Sanzo, ever the efficient delegator of work.

Hakkai's eyes are drawn to the bottle in his hands, found under the sink and bearing such portentous words.

There go the sparkles again: "Hee hee hee!"



"..."



Hakkai's eyes meet Sanzo's with the shine of resolve, "I can't do it, Sanzo. You know I'm against animal testing."

"He's not an animal!" Still, Sanzo recognizes resolve when he sees it. Carefully keeping the Prince of Sparkles out of his line of sight, Sanzo looks for another henchman to do his will.

Gojyo has taken a page from Hakkai's book, and is now studying his shoes, doing research on carpet patterns, and writing his dissertation on drapes.

...Goku, on the other hand, has found his own sheet of paper and joined Team Sparkle.




A united, if adorable, front presented, Hakkai holds out the bottle. "I'm sorry Sanzo."

"He's just too damn cute." Gojyo is Somewhere between Acceptance and Jealousy.




"Goddammit! Do I have to do everything myself?!" Sanzo snatches the bottle from Hakkai, daring anyone to point out that he rarely does anything himself.

The Mighty Mini-Monk marches over to the two playmates, and enters their storm of sparkles. He makes good use of his carefully cultivated concentration, refusing to read Kougaiji's card.

(Which says, 'Dear Mummy,' on the front. The inside may bear overwhelming cuteness.)





"Hey."

Kougaiji blinks up at Sanzo through the sparkles.

"Your Mom said to give you this." The monk lies through his holy teeth.

"Yay!"

While Goku remains thoroughly distracted by the paste and sparkle universe, Kougaiji takes the bottle... and promptly puts it in his jacket.



Dumbfounded, Sanzo watches him for a moment. Kougaiji returns to gluing pasta on the 'Y'.

Patience, it seems, wasn't taught on the same day as concentration in Monking Class.

"You're supposed to drink it, idiot."

"I'm not firsty."

This is all a little too much for Sanzo. "Damn it. If you're not going to drink it, give it back!"

"No!" Cries Kougaiji, jumping to his feet. Paste bottle in one hand, and the other holding his jacket close, Prince Chibi is on the defensive.

"It's fwom my Mummy!"





"..."


"..."


"..."






"... too damn cute."






Kougaiji finishes his card. Goku finishes his... sculpture? Hakkai makes them both clean up the sticky mess.



Defeated and cranky, Sanzo goes down for a nap.


Next Time: The Chibis Share a Lesson in Caring.



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