Tuesday, June 6, 2006

   When Chibis Attack! Part 36
Lost? Confused? Try reading the previous chapters.

Part 36: In Which There is Drama

"Creature!" Kougaiji's authoritative little voice resounds from on high...ish. It makes my hair stand on end. "Have you chosen to side with Sanzo and his band of thugs?"

"Yarg!" I elocute with precision my dismay and confusion.

"Yay! She's on our team!" Goku is looking forward to the impending catastrophe. Never a good sign.




"No, no, no!" Gojyo shushes him. "You know how it goes - the side with the least people always wins. You should be on his team, and she can be, too... and maybe we should tie up Sanzo and stuff him in the stove..."

"I'm not on a team!" I feel like a bystander at a rugby game who's accidentally wandered on field and caught the ball. "Dammit, why do we need teams? What the hell happened? Hakkai!"

Grab Hakkai. Take cover behind counter.




Hakkai takes a little black notebook out of his pocket. The word "Diary" is written on the front, and it is secured by a heart-shaped lock.

Hakkai fiddles with the key.

"Before he burns the place down, please." Motivate him to haste. "My place. Where I keep all my stuff."

"Right, yes. Once second. Ah!" He finally gets the little book open and puts on his glasses.




"Whatever plan you are devising will not succeed! My will is strong, and I will not fail." Kougaiji hollers.

It's... just not right. Not... cute.

"There's some cookies on the counter. Help yourself, while I do a quick re-cap." Hakkai counters.

"Ha! Such an old trick. I'll stay right where I am, thank you." The voice retreats a little.




Refuses cookies?

"...the hell?" I mumble.

"Hm. And they're fresh, you know. Chocolate." Hakkai ponders the situation.



Stare.



"Oh. Right." Hakkai returns to the planet of Not Cookies. "Yes. It says right here: In chapter Eighteen... um, I mean, on the eighteenth, a-hem, ha ha... Sanzo gave Kougaiji a bottle with 'Drink Me' written on it in very curly, plot-suggestive letters."

"Why?"

Hakkai fidgets self-consciously: "Because he's a big meany?"

"Damn straight." Sanzo mutters over his newspaper. His coffee cup has an excessively fluffy kitten on it.




Sigh.




"Point taken. So, the drink did this?"

"One can only assume. If I were wearing the little lab coat, I might say that it appears to have de-cutified his personality, while leaving him adorable in appearance."



Risk a furtive glance over the counter. Fluffy hair: Check. Big Eyes: Check. The fireball even has little glittery bits in it.

Crap! He spotted me!

"You there! Stand and make your first move. My mission is of utmost importance. I cannot afford to waste any more time!"

...but he really has lost his cute. Poor little guy.




"Okay, okay... just a sec." I issue an official reply. Stand slowly, muttering at Hakkai: "How do I fix it?"

"Ah ha ha ha..." Oh, no. The Laugh, again. I'm Doomed. "I wish I knew. I'm afraid all my little test tubes are with the lab coat, so I can't even guess."

Don't even think about the logic of that one.

I guess I'm on my own, then.

Me vs. Kougaiji, Round One!


CB says: Don't worry. Just... don't worry. He'll be okay. But you knew Kougaiji had to have a personality change at least once, right? Just to maintain some distant tie to the manga?

Cuteness Will Prevail!
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