Tuesday, July 19, 2005

   just catching up
I came back home from Florida the 12th. I saw dad twice... each time it wasn't great either. The first night he takes a cheap shot at me. He brings up Keith and it disgraces me that he can bring up my past and use it against me, he doesn't have the right to do so. I or Keith can bring it up only. I gave dad this look, if only looks can kill, I guarantee he wouldn't be here on this planet. The next day he tried to prove me wrong about Marshall. We got into a heated argument and I almost nearly jumped up and yelled you haven't been to Marshall in 13 or 14 years you don't know shit. But I didn't. Because that's exactly what he wanted. He wanted me to explode in front of my grandparents, to turn me into the bad guy. I don't give a fuck if he reads this... I don't care.. he brought this upon himself. Go ahead dad, keep trying your cheap shots and your low blows, and see where our relationship will go. I promise you I will not associate with you any longer, your causing me too much stress, its your move dad not mine. I'm done!

When I got back, I got the most un welcoming ever, a sick step-father which meant a very hateful Terry. I ignored him. I got home and called Molly. I went to her house to see her and her mom that obviously missed me. Molly's mom kept referring me as her second daughter whenever someone called. Molly and I went to the 2 local pet stores in Huntington. Her gecko died and she wanted a new lizard.

The next day (Wednesday) we went to a few more pet stores like ones in Ohio. I saw the cutest little puppy... he was so adorable and he wanted me to take him home. He only interacted with me too. I should have gotten him while i was there. Molly got her lizard and then I went to my job interview for cold stone creamery. I was nervous as hell but I was me... thats all that mattered. I dropped by Ainslie's work to say hello. I haven't seen in years!! We caught up and we plan to do lunch sometime. I, then, went to church earned some cash. during church I got a voicemail... mark listened to it first.
I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!!!!!
I now can earn money and eat ice cream on my break.

Thursday I got to see Mason after 8 days of not getting to see him. It was good for a while and then moody me... (cough PMS cough) got a little out of control. He was showing of to Z and did some things that brought back some horrible memories of Keith and Chippy. I went home in tears all the way back home. I cried myself to sleep as well. God why do those memories hover over me? Before going to bed I called mason and apologized for my mood while i was visiting him. He was understanding.

Friday Molly and I went to hurricane to get my car check over. My car was fine... Then we went to nitro for a couple of pet stores. Then we went to the mall in Charleston to see how much it change. Considering I haven't been there since I was 8, almost 10 years ago. Then we went bowling in St. Albans. We both did well, I bowled awesome!! My average was where I hope it will be when league starts up.

Saturday Mom, Terry, Mason and I went to the Newport aquarium. Its pretty cool. My Marshall shirt brought us a cool guide through the shark exhibit. I enjoyed the time I had with mason even tho I feel we still need to figure each other out.

Sunday: Alene, Katie and her friend britney, and I watched HOT's edition of beauty and the beast. We got rained on and we also made fun of the beast sounding like a caveman. Chico and John did a VERY good job. I was so proud!

Monday: Laze about day and clean. I got to talk to Mason again... it was ok.. we still have to build up trust but everything is awesome. Mom and I had a talk earlier in the week about Mason and I and about her and my father's relationship. It turns out they were good friends and then out of the blue my father asked her to marry her. No wonder it didn't last. If it was just friends for years how do you even think that your friend would go for marriage? Mom is sooooo happy for mason and I she's rooting for us lol. She's a strong hopeless romantic at heart. I'm so glad I have her support.

On that note I'm going to bed :-D

Love you Mason

Much love

Peace
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