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Tuesday, November 29, 2005


Love

I used to think, that love might be that one person in the entire universe, the entire eternity. One person just for you. And when you meet that person, you will know. And that this person, this soul, you would have to search for, maybe forever, again and again, even in different lives. And all other loves would be nothing but entertainment, something to ceep you busy untill that speciall someone comes your way. I used to believe that when you met this soul, it would be your twinsoul, and you would be united forever.

I remember from my dreams that I have loved in the past. Different lives, different persons. But I always thought that it might be the same soul. In another body. I used to long for this love, for this person to come back to me, to feel peaceful again. I woke up sometimes crying, for I had dreamt of my love, and lost it. I searched my heart to find it, because it had to be there, where it had been before. But I was so emty. So lonely.

I fell in love several times, and never thought any different. Love was something else. I met a person. He looked familiar to me, and I loved him from the very moment our eyes met. He told me that he had seen me somewhere before, but we had never met before. I dreamt of him, and I knew I loved him deeply. I still do. But that didnt stop me from falling in love with someone else.

3 times I fell in love. I met another person. A total stranger. He had the eyes of a wolf, and he scared me at first. I dreamt of werewolfs many nights in that period. Then I began to love him. And he loved me back. And I could not remember this person, but the feeling.. it was the same as it had been before. I recognise it from my dreams.

Then one night I had a dream that changed the way I had always looked upon love.

It taught me that the ones I remember today, the ones that will come to me and find me, they will always be there. There is no one true love. No twin soul. The ones I meet and love, the ones that I meet again, they will always be there, by my side. He is like that old book with magic spells, that you can take with you wherever you go. You know every inch of that book, and you know that if you are ever in trouble, it will help you, for you understand it. You can leave it somewhere and know that it will still be there when you come back. Filled with all good meories and knowledge.

But love... The love from my heart and dreams... It is like a flower that blossoms for only one year, one life. When winter comes, it dies. And when spring comes there will be new flowers. It will be the same type of flower, but never the same one. That is why it is important to hold on to it and enjoy it while you can. Because you can not take it with you when you leave, and you can not know that it will still be there when you come back.

That is why I know that I will stay with my wolf, and no longer search for love with that someone who will stay with me forever. For no mather what, he will always be him. And my wolf, my flower, he will be gone when winter comes. And then I will long for his love again, the love that only that flower can give. Only one time, one life.

Why am I talking about love and flowers? Here is why: I want to tell those of you who care, that there is no meaning in searching for the everlasting, because the everlasting will, in the end, always be there. Enjoy that which you only have for that one time. Atleast, that is what love is for me. It is not perfect with a twin soul, it is briefly, with a stranger that you might never see again. But, it is worth remembering.


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