Sunday, October 26, 2008

Costochondritis and a traumatizing experience.
Hello people what's up? It's the week of Halloween coming up and I'm feeling horrible!

Well, I'm getting better, but to say the least, this week was not fun for me. I've been having a congestion thing that's been going on for months, I must have severe allergies so I'm going to the doc for that, but with a mix of constant colds and flus, I caught costochondritis. I'm too lazy to tell you what it is so look it up. And one of the symptoms is severe stabbing pain in the ribs and back. So everytime I took a deep breath, coughed, moved even slighty, a thousand burning knives stabbed me. Every single time. It sucked. I have to breathe a certain way and it's very uncomfy ontop of congestion. Apparently it's from a result of respiratory infection (not surprising). So waking up 5 times having to lay a certain way was soooo painful, I thought I was dying. It hurt that bad. So I had to go to ER for a couple hours yesterday. Luckily, they said I'm a very healthy person so chances of me having gall bladder stones or anything serious wasn't commensurate. But I had to wait a couple hours for the test results, so I just chilled and watched the Halloween movies nonstop. Ah, I love those movies ^.^ in a Freddy vs. Jason fight, Michael Myers should've came up and killed 'em both.

Just to let you know, I'm not very fond of hospitals. I mean, needles and potentially homicidal patients don't scare me at all, it's rather my trust for doctors and medicine that gets in the way. I don't trust them. Everytime I get a flu shot, I get sick. Yeah, I have a weaker immune system than most people do, but geez. The bed they had me lay on wasn't even clean. Sterlility my ass. The sheet was torn and had brown crummy particles that I didn't trust to be dirt. The nurses and doctors were nice though, but I just can't get the thought pass me that they're all trying to drug me. I had to keep telling myself calm down, they're here to help you, not hurt you. They're trained medical people that give you medicine to help you, medicine is good unless it's laced with cyanide extracts >__< damnit bad thought!! So I convinced myself that the codeine the nurse offered would help me. Bad idea.

I learned later I have severe allergic reactions to any narcotic medicine, like morphine. I wish I had known that....

So after being recommended to pick up pain relievers at a store pharmacy, we drove there. We had to wait a few minutes for it and my dad left for a bit to go to the bathroom. That's when the codeine took effect. It was the worst part of the day.

While codeine is weaker in a sense than morphine, it's still very effective to soothe patients of pain by mimicking endorphins transmitting throughout the central nervous system. I don't feel like giving a huge explanation, so in a nutshell, it's the stuff druggies get fucked up on. So a regular person would feel good having this. But if you're allergic, you'll be having some baaaad trips.

So I was just sitting on the chair, eyeing people suspiciously, more than normal lol. I started feeling dizzy. The world started to swirl and people started to become.... well... unhuman.... it's really hard to explain, but it was really messed up. The light in the room started getting brighter and I could only see outlines of people. Everything turned white. I was freaking out, "OMG I'M GOING BLIND!" I really thought I was. The light was very blinding, I started to sweat, tremble, and hyperventilate and wanted to get out. I almost started stripping my clothes off, but I had just took off my jacket and then my dad came. He realized something was wrong and I tried to stand up but I fell and hit my head on the wall and almost fainted. I didn't but he had to help me walk. I wanted to scream and cuss 'OMG OMG WHAT DID THOSE FUCKERS DO TO ME?', but my subconsciousness was still active and telling me to be polite in a store full of people XD so instead I just said, "WHAT DID THEY DO TO ME?? DAD WHAT DID THEY DO TO ME?!" It didn't end there.

My subconsciousness went in conflict with the drug effect. So in the back of my mind, I logically knew what was happening and where I was, but the drug pushed thoughts of reasoning away and I felt very numb and delusional. Here's exactly what that looked like:

Subconsciousness: OK, you're in a store, the drugs taking effect, don't freak.

Drug: OH EM GEE I GOT ANTS IN MAH PANTS TAKE IT OFF!

Subconsciousness: Don't take them off. You're in a public place.

Drug: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!?!

Subconsciousness: STAY CALM! The drug's in effect and you're very delusional right now, your dad is on the way.

Drug: I'M FALLIN DOWN!!!!

Subconsciousness: you just hit the wall.

Drug: THE FAIRIES MADE ME DO IT!

Subconsciousness: OK you're walking out of the store, don't draw attention to yourself, and don't be cursing and screaming, use polite language

Drug: WHAT DID THOSE FUCKING PIECES OF COW POO DO TO ME?!?!

Subconsciousness: You're outside! Fresh air!

Drug: I can see the opening of the earth. I CAN SEE IT! IT'S THE LIGHT! IS IT HEAVEN? NO, HELL? NO IT'S THE CENTER OF THE EARTH, OMG IT'S BLINDING ME!!!

Subconsciousness: QUIET! Let's be logical here. You're in the middle of the store parking lot.

Drug: Whatever, is that Keanu Reeves on a flying hippo???!!!

Subconsciousness: ..... you're on your own kid

Me: NOOOO DON'T LEAVE ME, I NEED YOU! WHY IS MICHAEL MYERS IN THE BACK OF THE CAR?!

That's what I get for watching those movies... Seriously, that's actually how it went in my mind. I actually thought I saw the opening of the earth in the parking lot. I don't know how to explain it... think of Journey to the Center of the Earth. That's what it was. The earth's core was blinding, I thought it was heaven or hell, but I can't explain. Cars and people were unreal, just beings that were there. And yes, I did see Keanu Reeves and Micheal Myers. I felt apathetic, but at the same time erratic. I don't know how that works, but drugs can do anything. Now I'll never understand why people get addicted. That's good for me though.

The rest of the day I just hung out and watched TV and watched the rest of the Halloween marathon and Constantine, which is very ironic, since Keanu Reeves was on it. He was sending me subliminal messages to my brain! For real! Or it was the drugs. Who knows.

Today, I'm feeling a lot better, a little pain, but not much. I hope the very few, if any, of you here had a good day and a good laugh from my experience.
Comments (1)