Wednesday, July 15, 2009

wut i look like now....




lol i look different right? =D i look goood now lol
nothing news goin on here. miami is awsome good weather.....te place is filled with fucking assholes tho, i might be one of them lol but atleast it makes things interesting here ^^ ily all... i miss guys
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Saturday, July 11, 2009

bored?
im bored as fuck. someone talk to me.
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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Yeaaah bitches!
yoyoyoyoyo! hey wuts up? is anyone still on here? man myotaku must be like, crippled man.... dude, i miss u people sooo much u helped me get threw wut i think used to be a hard time in my life. ah, if u guys still wanna contact me......look up john cameron on myspace =) i look alot different lol im hot now! and i hve a beautiful girlfriend! her name is yailyn (shes a reff >_>) but shes sweet and thoughtful and she loves me for me. cant ask for more right? i JUST graduated high school, didnt think i would but.....lifes turning out to be just fine. crazy. or maybe in just high..... loldamn. i named this screenname after a song i used to listen to ALL the time when i made this. its by black label society. damn... memeries. ^__________^ i love you all! contacts me!
J.D.
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Sunday, December 28, 2008

   i have longer hair now....
2 am.
lol its a good song if u get threw the intro!

lol wuts up my fellow people? i miss u guys...i got a new pic up =) anni changed the song to....

fum nothin to big's goin down. my gf left for chigago today...so shes gone

meaning i get to pimp mad ho's for the rest of the vaca. XDDD
she broke up with me the day b4 =(
but then yesterday she called me and was all apologetic >_> so...yeah. we fucked.


>_> lovely relationship

anyhoo U____U my mother figure broke her foot. dad left, so i gotta take care of her. i dont like her but...w/e u kno?
<3 well ive gone on lng enough...peaceness
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Saturday, December 27, 2008

witch spice girl do i wanna impregnate?
xD yooo i think im bak on this site from now on lol i miss it and the people!
u guys rock!!
=D hi my name is.............


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Sunday, December 21, 2008

guess whoes bak?
ok. the past to days have kicked ass.
i got inna car crash the other day, rite after we re upped. we had like an ounce of weed in the car, so...we just left the scene. it wasnt much of a crash it just scratched the car....but its stil illegal. later that night i went to a party....everyone was drunk
cept me. et and friends were doing coke as well =\ i didnt really like that.
ive come to a revalation it seems. during the madness, i assesed my mental state.


most people drink, or smoke or do drugs to get....fucked up. they always have those nights where they friend for more, they wanna push things to see how fucked up they can get.....and they always want more

but i hav no such desire. i get content very easy. idk y or how...but im so satisfied with just like a bowl every now and then......its cost effective and u hav a buzz all day

i just smoke to make thin gs funnier and to just have a good time.....

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Saturday, December 13, 2008

   The moment u want it
=) srry im not on much n o more..but this sites gay u kno...i use myspace now =|

things r chillan. ive been thinking lately.i think alot.
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Sunday, November 30, 2008

just fucking read it...its everything i am today and more
this is different.
Current mood: accomplished
Category: Life


ok. i dont usually like to post a blog like this, for i like to keep my thoughts to myself. but i think with this.....it should b documented. iono

fuck it lets write



well i dont remember anything from more than 4 years ago. actually its three, but i just remember bits and pieces of my freshmen year. but mostly i remember nothing other than that. anything b4 my freshie year....i cannot remember. or maybe its just that i dont want to. i dont know. and i dont really care

freshem year i came to southwest with absolutely no friends. it was a new school, and i knew absolutely no one in it. it was a fresh start, now that i look bak. i wish i treated it like one. i wish i was like i am now bak then...oh well tho.

i was extremely antisocial. outside of our GLD class, i talked to no one. actually, i was pretty much the opposite, personality wise. i listened to nothing but country music, i was drug free, i was gullable ( ok mabe that hasnt changed) i was untrusting.....actually i resembled that kid that would kill evryone in the class one day

i was like that all year. that summer, i went to some kind of vocational class, where i got my bookbag for the next two years lol i spent my summer inbetween that and taekwondo.

the next year, where my memery starts, i was alittle better. i still was chubby. i wore glasses....and i always had a sweater on lol

i started opening up for a while. i had my first real relationship in my teakwondo class. she was cool....i lost my virginity to her. she cheated on me, and i went into depression.....she dumped me too. haha

i started overdosing on adderall excessively. ritalin to. this was the second lowest ive been in my life. the first i have never told a soul about. i probly never will. i become suicidal. i tryed to drown myself in my lake. i couldnt go through with it though...thank god

then my teacher, Ms. Shah started talking to me. she lost her brother when she was 8. we connected to a certain level i think...i got my sence of humor bak late in that year.

unfortunently, i was still very anti social. i still knew only like 20 people in my school. 20 people in general actually lol

well....that summer i changed. i woke up one day...and i was a different person. i have no idea what happend, and i dont really care. i havent thought about it, but it was like my personality flipped. i became who i am now. well, mostly.

i became more social, and more....happy

it was then i realized my love for music, and my love for everything else as well. i love everytrhing and everyone lol

i started listening to rock more often.....now i listen to everything.

um my junior year. lets see. that was the year i went out with breigh, and then kitty. haha both relationships fell through unfortunently. i found that i deal with things so much differently now. when i lost them, i was ok with it. i have a new source of indifference...nothing upsets me anymore. no kidding, i could get up rite now, walk into my living room, and find my mother brutally murdered with blood everywhere, and not have it affect me in the slightest. no one but me knows how true this statement is. this doesnt just go for my mother, but for everyone i know and care about.

junior year, i met my friends that i have now. my relationship with ET had started to resemble something of what it is now. i met taylor, and brandon, and everyone else i kno. and then i met........weed

i started smoking like there was no tomarrow....witch to me, there wasnt. live for now. everything in life is ment to teach u a lesson. my brother dying taught me to live for the second, and that there may very well not be any future at all. it just took me a long time to realize that.

over the summer, i smoked so much. exspecially near the end. me and et saw each other everyday. we smoked everyday. i dont regret even one second of that summer. that was the most amasingtime of my life. that was the summer i lived. i became a part of TTC. i will die TTC lol et knows wut to do when i die.

i read the book sidartha. it changed my spiritual life forever. i became a univerasal utaian. i still am. probly will b forever.

then...this year. wow. this year is fucking............insane. i found that i still hated myself. this was pretty much like 60% of the reason i smoked at all. and the more i thought about myself, as a person, the more i smoked. this year was when i got into tobaco products. cigs were amasing. i want one now. then, there was the black and milds. god, i could do some good tricks with those. but, i had no control whatsoever. i would smoke till i had nothing left.

i had nothing to stop me, so i didnt. well...one day on the way to Et's house, i saw a girl walkingdown the street...i wondered who she was.

Et gave her my aim and myspace[i think] and we chatted once inna while.......

then, my family lost our healthcare. i wasnt even aware anything was happening, since my parents believe in keeping me in the dark. they suprised me, and picked me up from school one day and took me to the doctor and had me drug tested. i came out positive.

i ended up getting kicked out of my house. i lived with et. this...was a week of revelation. again lol. it hit me, that i cold make it on my own. and i loved being away from my house so much...i still hate this place. i cant wait to get out of here. anyways...ets mom was so nice. et to. i will never forget how they took me in when i need help the most. i hope i can repay them someday.

while i wsas living there, i met this girl. she was so shy though. i didnt think much of her, i was busy courting another girl at the time. she came out one night, and she just stood there, like an outcast in the padio. in text, she was funny and kinda giddy and...more social. i thought, wow shes just some quiet person in real life huh? lol

well.....i talked to her more. Et's mom is wut really pushed us i think haha

Et kept on telling me that this girl liked me, but that she was weird

hes no help at all -_-'

well. i fell in love with this girl. i have no idea how. i knew though, when i was laying next tot this girl, and she was looking into my eyes. i saw how beautiful she was, and that her eyes were INSANE! i knew nothing about her really....but as i was looking at her, just absorbig her image...i thought, wow....i could really fall in love with this girl. and then....i did. from that night, i have loved her.

lol i quit tobaco. mostly cuz i smoked so much one day that i got a cold sore on my lip and couldnt kiss her. that pissed me off [ not really but..u kno me] so...i quit.



i wrote this on the first day i didnt get to see her since we got togeather <3 i love her so much. i really believe that shes my soul mate. i never knew that some other person could change my view on everything so fast, at such an intensity, that i am really left speachless.

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Saturday, November 29, 2008

   kickin it till our feet hurt
xD wusss up little ones?
open up the bullets and put the lead into the pencils!

um....ive been chillan....my parents left yesterday for the entire weekend. i had a partyish thing last night...it was chillan
i love my gf! shes s' cool!
im sunbathing now...bai ^____________^ <3
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Saturday, November 22, 2008

well, my lovely fans, i must say....yesterday was pretty awsome. started out fucking homosexual tho.

my friend woke me up. phone call. he was bored, and had been awake since 3 in the morning. it was like 9. i agree to come over...once i get ready. i get up...brush my teeth, wash meh face....and work out. same shit every day. i got to his house around 10. same time as always...so he called me for nothing. oh well.

well.....im impacient. its just how i am. im at his house, andout...witch in reality isnt that much......unless u think any amount is to much.

i had stolen $20 from my parents that morning. i wanted to ...i need to smoke. so i do. but...a girl arrives, shes chillin to. we smoke till we run buy. the girl had a contact....but he was at the beach, but was on his way home kinda. so....we desided to wait. i hate waiting. and when uve smoked a little, it makes waiting even worse. it felt like 3 years. how very gay.

well....this next incident is probly the worst thing i have ever done. if there is a god, or some form of judgement in the afterlife, this one instent will be shown, and it will banish me to the depts of hell.

we had to take my freinds little sister with us. to buy weed. i sat next to her.

shes like 3 years old. no fucking kidding.

and

i smoked next to her.

i didnt really care at the moment....but looking at it now....it was fucked up.

well...we wait till we get home to do more. we go to ets room.....and toke. it was fire shit. i was so far gone. i even smoked a little adderall. not much tho....but i still did it

i am insanely high.

at about 4 o clock..i had to go. i went home, did some chores, when my freind brian calls me. he ends up picking me up....and we drive around to pass the time. along the way we stop...and drop off some merchendice...to people.

after 2 stops...it was kinda boring, so we picked up another kid, i dont know his name. but i talked to him alot. mostly cause we were all high.

we all were talking mad shit.

Brian looks at me " hey...if i get tired, will u drive?" "no...i cant drive an automatic" "have you ever fallen asleep while driving?" "no...but i woke up driving once"

then, a red light on the dashboard came on. the new kid asked wut it waas....i said not to worry, that basically all it does is let u know that the lightbulb is working. he doesnt find that funny

so i asked him wut he does....he said he was a student at miami dade. i asked him wut he studied...he said jurnalism i replied "OH really? well im writing a piece myself about a photographer who goes completely insane trying to cature a close up picture of the horison." he didnt get it.

well, as we were driving...we saw a public bus stopped on the railroad tracks, and a train was coming ( it was very far off, but...we were under the influence...so...we thought shit was gonna go down)

u see the train coming, and then the bus is sitting there.(can u feel the tension) we freaked out. kinda

im in the back seat, next to this new kid. i look at him, and go "u know how in the movies, when some one reads a letter...how they have a voice read it aloud? well.....i have that voice in my head when i read menues" this, i remember, he found funny.

THE BUS

brian freaked out "those people r gonna die instently!" "all people die instently...its the only way u die...ur alive, ur alive, ur alive...then ur dead." "well..yea, but those people wont die of natural causes." "well, they got hit by a train..so NATURALLY they r gonna die." the kid next to me just halfway sits up, and says"yo guys..we better get out of here before they die so no one blames it on us"

just so u know how retarded we all are when we're high, we all agreed.

but...brian drove to fast. we actually got pulled over for speeding.WUT A FUCKING HEAT UP! the guy askes for licence an registration. brians goes to hand it to the cop..i lean over to the new kid and go

" that cops voice...its the voice from the menues!" what?" "never mind ill tell u later"

apparently brian was listening the whole time to my stupid shit...and as he hands it to the policeman, he says "here you go...by the way., do you know wut todays specials are?" the cop stares at him...and im blasted...so im laughing histerically..and the cop goes"so wut u think ur a wise guy?" and perfectly, without missing a beat and in a flawless monotone voice brian says "well i have my ,moments of clear prospective" (or something along those lines)

the cop wasnt pleased. we got a tciket. the official write-up was because our wheeles were not properly threaded lol the cop basically wrote us up for being smart asses. the ticket was $89
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