Monday, June 13, 2005

   .....
Ya know,the little things are the ones that ya miss.Im still getting no sleep.Im not even tired.Ive tried everything but a mallet to my forehead.Everything still tastes like ashes.But hey,im takin it better than anyone else.Im still awaiting the toxicology reports.I atleast wanna know the actual cause of death.It looked like CHF,so il'l leave it at that.But nothin else has happened,so,im out.
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Sunday, June 12, 2005

I dont even know where to begin.....
Confuckinggradulations to ANY higher powers that be.If there is a god....he better hope his ass is Jackie Chan if I meet him.I doubt any of you know yet,but my mother was found dead at 4:12am.My brother found her and went into shock,so I was the only one brave enough to check her pulse.She was dead.....fucking dead.Rigormortous had already started.Cause of death...pending.We think it was CHF(Congestive Heart Failure).But her docter had her on enough medication to fuck up an elephant.But atleast she went out in her sleep,smiling.After the ambulance got here,13 vehicles were packed in my driveway.I had already beaten the hell out of my truck.It needs very extensive body work now.I dont cry over anything,except her.I actually cried for half an hour straight.She may have been my step mother,but she was the only one I called mom.The other one is back in the state pen.Everyone took it kinda hard.She was happy all day thursday.Everyone she talked to said she was happy,even right before she went to sleep.My fucking class A fuck up grandfather is lucky.If this is stress related....his ass is grass.He has been doing nothing but bitching at her for 3 months.And on top of that,she told him she hated him 3 days earlier.His only duaghter and his own father both had told him three days before they died they hated him.He took it the hardest.He hasnt even came outta his room since friday.He just cant face it.All the problems he caused.The only thing keeping our family together was my mom.He should feel lucky.She was the only thing keeping his sorry ass alive.She told me even if she died not to kill her father.And I will do my best to respect her wishes.I just wish she would would just walk in bitching at me.Everyone thought we hated eachother.Me and her was actually almost as close as her and my dad.I finally got him calmed down enough to go to sleep.He was working in Kansas at the time.I feel real sorry for him.Nobody would give him a straight answer so the secretaries had him call an extremely good friend of the family.Atleast he had told him what had happened.No one else but me could of told my father Terry had passed away.And if you havent noticed,# is a very bad number for my family.Every death in our family involves that fucking number.To much shit comes in threes.I really cant sleep so i figured id update.The only thing that got me to sleep was a 24pk case of Natural Light and a fifth's worth of 80proof Montezuma.The first time id ever drank not to have fun.So,il'l either be up for a week,or just have to get more beer.The worst part is,my dad actually dont give a shit.He just reminds me it wont help for ever.And this I know,it'll just help me get to sleep.Well,I can ramble on,or research.So,laterz to all.
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Wednesday, June 8, 2005

Im back....
I be back for the hundredth time.Im using one of those damn AOL disk.Only about 1000 hours left.So,I should have the internet for about a week.Im doing ok since the wreck.We atleast know who ran us off the road now.A local fuck up.And Ive been rebuilding Bills Blazer on my free time.But mostly ive been bored.And rambling.Ive been doing mostly nothing for the last month.But,now I have other things to do,so,laterz.
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Friday, May 13, 2005

   ?
Im bored as hell and nothins happened.Im still a bit sore.I stepped down off my porch and jarred my spine if that counts.Im gonna be gone regularly.Work sucks.And I got nothin else.I might do some System of a Down lyrics in the future.But,other than that.....boredom.
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Saturday, May 7, 2005

Im all right....sorta...
Went to the hospital and got 3 X-rays and poked at.And it costed only about 5 grand.Yeah,Oklahoma healthcare sucks.But,I found out I haqve a pulled muscle in my neck,my collarbone is bruised,I pulled 3 more muscles in my left shoulder,2 bruised ribs,and a bruised sternum.So,im geussin im allright.Im not hurtin too bad.I should be over it all by monday.And I never realized that a lot of people cared.Like I said,ive had a rough month.And I can still shoot.I shot a fuck load of Copperheads yesterday and a Velvet Tail this mornin.But im doing it all on just tylenol now.My mom gave me a whole bunch of shit in my coffee and didnt bother to tell me.Lets just say,I was holding on to the couch to keep from flying away.That bad of a trip.But,atleast I didnt hurt.The thing that pisses me off though,is my mom knows I hate pills.So,im not even taking Tylenol.So,as usual,i can ramble on,or just stop here.Laterz.
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Friday, May 6, 2005

ouch.....
Ok,sorrytp sound like im making excuses not to update,but...yeah....I was in a wreck coming home from school yesterday.A damn 70-ish Chevy pick up ran me,Bill,and my lil sister off the road.Bill's got a banged up leg,my sis is covered in bruises,and me,well i got the worst.I might have some bruised ribs,my knees are fucked up,and my left arm feels like someones wrenching it every time i move it a few inches.The Blazer is totalled.Nearly the most heartless person I know nearly cried yesterday.After we all scrambled out,Bill had a nervous break-down.His Blazer was his life.And now its dead.And seat belts save lifes,but nearly kill you in the process.The seat I was in came unbolted and smashed me into the seatbelt.So,now my right shoulder has a mark where the seat belt actually cut into me.And I just got over that I-beam falling on me.Im supposed to go get X-rays and shit today.I couldnt even get out of bed this morning by myself.I had to have my brother pick me up so i could stand.Thats how bad my ribs hurt.So,i have a dangerous life as of yesterday.I get hurt way too much.So,now,im going back to sleep because im not supposed to even be walking.The ambulance people said I could go in and get checked out.I really dont want to though.Hospitals fcost money and...well,we're all poor here.So,in conclusion,im gonna be sore til bout monday.And this just fucked up my weekende.And ive noticed I can ramble on about this forever so,laters.
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Wednesday, May 4, 2005

   \m/(' . ')\m/
Im back again.My life has been shit.My moms car was impounded.We had $350 in fines.My grandfather has made my household a battleground.I had a 250lb 12ft I-beam fall and nearly tear my shoulder off a week ago.Nothing was broken or torn,just still sore.My phone was turned off.My AOL might be turned off in 3 days.Ive been stressed enough to send an army into seizures.Im hardly sane anymore.And I have a lot to do because ive been gone nearly a month maybe two.I lost count.So I should be ok.Laterz.

And I love my Elissa
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Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Ok,I aint got much time so this is gonna be short.My phone is turned off.Thats why I havent been on for awhile.Im AT SCHOOL RIGHT NOW.jUST THOUGHT ID TELL YOU GUYS IM NOT DEAD.Laters
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Monday, April 4, 2005

?
Well,had an interesting weekend.Found out one of my friends is a pedophile.Shot some coyotes.Shot a lot of shit.Beat Resident Evil:4.And got Black Label Society:Mafia.And im busy talkin to someone so short pos.laterz
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Friday, April 1, 2005

   ?
Staring off into space has never been this cool.Smoke is a strange thing to look at at 5 am.Im basically rambling because my popularity ranking is at #1412 and I want #1400.So,more visits....I geuss I get more popular.And I noticed the changes to the comment boxes.Theyre ok.But I still dont know for shure why they changed them.Oh well,laterz.
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