Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Err, as you can see from that music box just hovering over *points up* i've been messing about with me site.

Ok, i lied. Sw33tz has been messing with me site, happy now? Lol. We're (meaning mainly her) are working on my nex site =) All shiny n pretty hehe. Well, that's if it goes to plan >>; And when it comes to MyO, it usually doesn't XD But heres hoping neh.

Ok, here's a fanfic i wrote ages ago and decided to tweak abit last night randomly =D
Warning: This fic is boy/boy love, don't like, don't read.
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Title: Now I know
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Seto/Joey
Summary: Seto catches Joey in the bathroom in a rather awkward position.
Rating: 12..15 maybe?
Disclaimer: No, i don't own Joey, nor do i own Seto. Which is a shame really.
Author's Notes: It's very short, but i like it. And yes i do realise Seto n Joey may be a little OOC. I wrote this a long time ago, just tweaked it abit.
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I've finally figured it out. After all this time, I finally realised why I keep coming back for more. It's not just about the sex anymore, no, there's more to it now. Can you remember when it all first started? You walked into the boys bathroom at school and caught me in a rather awkward position. Your eyes widened when you saw the blade I was gripping rather harshly, and the deep thin red line going up my arm. It doesn't even take a genius to work out what I was doing. Snatching the blade from me you slapped me, left a red mark on my face for quite a while may I add. I would have laughed at the fact that you had slapped me like a girl and hadn¢¢ç¯t punched me, had it not been for expression your face. Never before had I seen you like that and never again do I want too. You almost cried, and Mr. Cold-Hearted does not cry, yet alone for me. But there you were, pain filled expression, and it was directed at me. I should have yelled, kicked and screamed at you to mind your own business and go shove it. I didn't have the heart too.

Dragging me back to your mansion I got 'cleaned up' and bandaged, well you mainly done that part, I sat there silently. Somehow, I am not quite sure how, one thing led to another, and we ended up kissing. When our lips parted though, I still felt cold and lonely. You weren¢¢ç¯t being the Kaiba I knew and hated. And when you told me you cared for me, I laughed in your face, a bitter cold laugh, it sounded very familiar to my ears though. I sounded like my father. The reason why I hurt myself. The reason why my mother and sister left me. The reason for all the pain I¢¢ç¯ve felt. I almost lost it then.

Pushing you away I ran out into the streets and to the nearest pub, to drown my sorrows the exact same way my father does. You never came after me. Later I found out that your personal doctor had called just after I left telling you Mokuba had been admitted to the emergency ward and you were needed there immediately. You did however find me staggering home early hours in the morning, completely hammered and yelling at some woman. I would have hated myself even more then I did already if you hadn't been there, hadn¢¢ç¯t been there to stop me. I actually raised my hand to that woman! Was quite willing to hit her, just to shut her up. Just like my father had done to my mother for all those years. No wonder my mum didn't take me with her. I thank whatever God there may be that you were there.

The moment I was sober again and able to recall everything that had happened, I broke down. Becoming like my father was not something I wanted, it was a fate worse than death in my eyes. You held me then. I don't really know what possessed me to do this, but I kissed you, I guess it was the warmth coming from your body. After a few heated moments things developed and we ended up in the bed having sex. At that time I couldn't call it 'making love', you were just there. No matter how cruel that sounds, it's true. I needed someone's shoulder to cry on, and you were there, willing to give me anything, so I took it. I never heard you when you whispered "I love you" after we had finished. If I had done, it wouldn't have taken me so long to realise that this wasn't just a game to you, that you were being serious.

We had sex several times after that. Whenever I felt down, I came to you. Drowned my sorrows in bodily pleasure, allowed you to complete me over and over. It was only yesterday that we actually talked about what happened that first day. That's when I found out you loved me, and had done for some time. After a long talk, and a lot of crying on my behalf, you held my face in your hands, pressed out lips together in a chaste kiss and spoke softly. I didn't quite catch everything you said because my head was thumping from the headache my hiccupping had given me. However I did catch that one little phrase that made my heart flood with joy, "I love you". And now laying here in your arms, listening to your heart beat, feeling your warmth all around me, I can easily say, I love you too.
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