Sunday, September 12, 2004

ADVERTISING....
few things to say before I get on to the main point of this post.
1: I wasn't fired (darn)
2: Im gonna try and stick at English for a while
3: Photos tomorrow providing I can get access to the net. I would do it now, but my connection is slow and crappy.

and Now *drumroll"...

Darke Angel…we all love him. But there’s only one of him…UNTIL NOW!

Yes, presenting for the first time nowhere, DARKE ANGEL ACTION FIGURES!

Each one of these fifteen centimetre high figures comes with its own unique feature!
There’s glomping Darke, with real glomping action, high Darke with Red Bull Swigging action and electronic Darke with motor scooter. Press the button and hear him say one of several road rage phrases, including: “OH, THE SPEED!!”, “OUTTA MY WAY ASSHOLE!”, “C’MON, YOU COULD FIT A DOUBLE DECKER BUS THROUGH THERE!” and “EAT MY DUST, LOSERS!”.


And now, for a limited time only, there’s the ultimate Darke Angel toy: DARKE ANGEL ELCTRONIC DELUXE PLUSHIE!!!

This 12’’ Plushie comes with scale size Red Bull can and Upside Down Toast.
Press his stomach and hear him say one of two trillion phrases!! Put him in front an anime or manga and he will comment on it! Put Red Bull in his hand and he will say “Oh yeah, that’s the stuff,” or “Damn, Im high.” Put upside down toast in his hand and he will say “Man, am I depressed.” Put him on his head with the toast and he will quote Shakespeare!
Other phrases include Quotes from his Manga “See No Evil, Speak No Evil,”, unique thoughts for the week, Checkout philosophy, bitching about work and cadets, funny random phrases and much, much more! Here’s a selection:
“Ha-HA-ha. That makes me laugh.”
“C’mere y’all and gimme a hug,”
“Poontang!”
“When there’s trouble, you know who to call: Darke Angel! *ringing sound* Hullo? You’re in trouble? BWA-HA-HA-HA! *hangs up*”
“Life is that annoying period between naps.”
“I wanna cookie!”
“I wish I had a Gundam,”
“Wear sunscreen,”
“Every journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step…unless you’re in a wheelchair…”
“Sticks and stones will break my bones, but a bullet to the head would kill me.”
“Life is like a Ferrari. It goes too fast. But that’s okay. You can’t afford it anyway.”
“I hate Mondays. And Tuesdays. And all the other days…”
And more!!

ALSO: Darke Angel is fully interactive with other electronic toys. Example: Put him front of a Furbie ™ and the following might ensue:

Furbie: ME WUV YOU!
Darke: Fuck off, Foo’! Im trying to look cool!

Or with a Poo-chi:
Poo-Chi: Woof!
Darke: Piss off Mutt. Do I look like a fucking fire Hydrant to you?

Put two Darke DX plushies together and they talk to each other!! They also sing a duet of a number of original songs, including “High on Life,” and the highly acclaimed “I talk to myself, that’s why they put me away,”

Darke Angel DX Plushie also comes with a number of different clothes! Put him in his full length Leather Jacket and he’ll say, “Oh yeah, looking good!”
Put him in his Sleeve-less T-shirt and he’ll say, “Its gonna be a hot one!”
Put him in his cadet uniform and he’ll yell out commands!
Put him in his Work Uniform and he’ll complain endlessly and randomly sprout out interesting thoughts!
Or put him in nothing at all, and he’ll say: “hey, whatever floats your boat baby!” or “what are you, gay?”

Darke Angel DX Plushie is not available anywhere, for any price, because he does not exist! Order Now and you’ll get laughed at down the phone! Pay by Credit Card and you’ll receive large bills every month as I steal your money!

Darke Angel Action Figures and Darke Angel Deluxe Electronic Plushie, bringing unique entertainment to your life.


This advert was brought to you by Darke Angel at MyOtaku.com, the same twisted random freak of nature that brought you “Upside Down Toast depression cure,” “Project H,” “See No Evil, Speak No Evil,” The news, Hurricane Ivan and death warmed up.
Darke Angel “an otaku for the people, from the pits of hell. Vote Darke Angel today!”

ciao!

PS: my sincerest apologies to all who live in florida regarding the whole Ivan thing. Be battening down dem hatches now. take care!!
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