Monday, February 4, 2008

   Invited to the night castle
Please, step this way my friend. Enter my world of black desire where the demons reign.

Ok, so that would be really cool. But unfortunately my life isn't that cool. There are a lot of things that would be cool but I don't think I have the finger stamina to type them all. So, I shall leave them up to your dirty little imagination and see what you can come up with. ^_^ Let me know how that goes.

Things are relatively good. I have no idea what i feel at the moment. Except lathargic and lazy. Of course that is aside from my overpowering excitement over AO.

I'm going to start memorizing all the lyrics of the D.N. Angel theme song for karaoke at AO. (No I don't already have them memorized. I know. You're thinking "geez, lightweight. You call yourself an anime fan?!") But off onto random topics!

Sometimes I wish I had gone to high school. For the social aspect mainly and so I would have an easier time getting my foot in the door for college. Which I'm torn over on my magor. I keep floundering between my dreams of musical theatre nad the financial stability of a market specialist. But I also sometimes want to know what it's like to face the prejudice agianst gays and lesbians. I know, tell me all you want about how I am lucky not to have gone through it but I'll still be curious. My curiosity is insaitable.

So I have to tell one of my friends that I don't want to be his friend anymore. He's a control freak. Suffocatingly so. He doesn't have a cell phone and his friends aren't allowed to call his parents phone. So every time he calls it's because HE wants to talk and rant. I know, seems rather pathetic right? I like my friendships to be two ways. I'll be there for them, and they can be there for me. I'm not here to be at anyone's beck and call and just be a shoulder to cry on. I'm worth way more than that. As well as all that, when we hang out is always on his terms. He specifies the date and time. He always has to call me first. It drives me crazy. To add to it, his emotions are so freakin intense they are scary. No, not all intense emotions are scary. But when he's mad it feels like he might hit me at any moment. He wouldn't but it still scares me. And it's always about him! It's like he's a self-degrading narcisist! DISCLAIMER: intense emotions do not bother me most of the time. There is something about his that rubs me the wrong way. I myself am a very intense and emotional person.

Ok, Becca's rant is done. And so is her post. Ciao!
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