Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Music therapy
Im not that stupid to realise people actual intentions when they start asking you weird questions or even start getting nice to you.But I am a little slow when it come to this issue.Hell.I have always been the slowest in this family compared to my other siblings.Let's just skip this part and talk about brighter things and avoid from start feeling down about myself.Lol.Today Hazrin and Azyan came to my house.We baked a cheese cake.We were so proud of it that the cheese cake actually tasted good and yeah,it was nice and all that.Guess it was quite and achievement for us since we barely know how to cook.Albeit that,Im still planning to master in cooking soon.We're planning to do pudding this friday,because it's gonna be for my lil bro's bday party..and erm..mine too.HAHA!I mean,Im gonna do this small barbecue party for my clicks.Yeah,you get the picture.By this sunday,Im gonna leave to Turkey.So,I hope you guys won't get sick for missing me too much.;)
I don't think Im feeling down as much as I felt a few months before this.Infact,Im feeling way happier when things are much clearer now.I know what's best for me.I guess.Despite the worries for the upcoming spm result,but what the heck.Like I said,I did my best.I'll just leave everything to God.Plus,now that I have streamyx,I've been listening to songs that well...give me the trigger to just enjoy myself and life.LMAO.That really sound cheesy.Haha!Like there's this one song,it's the first opening for Bleach,titled 'Asterisk' sung by the Orange Range.I don't know.I like the song.It always makes me forget all the shits and just try to have fun.As for the Asian Kung-fu Generation,it always reminds me of friends that I always have around me.How important their presence are to me.Okla,if you're reading this.You guys know who you are.Im a big fan of Laruku and as well as Hyde's.I like this one song titled 'stay away'.It's an old song.But hell yeah.I like it.The video clip is awesome.There's this one line in that song 'maybe lucky,maybe lucky,I dare say Im lucky'.what da....???Why am I being such a lame ass person tonite?God.whatever.There's also this one band named 'Jack's Mannequin'.I think their songs sound pretty good too.It's a little emo and all that,but it's good if you're one of those 'im feeling emo today' kinda people.lol.Th whole point of me saying this is that,I cant live without music.It fills my soul.I know that just don't sound too right.But it's the truth.New age.I'll try to get over with the fact soon.
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Monday, December 11, 2006

   Hold my hand
Fine.Maybe Im not the nicest person on earth after all.Atleast,Im just being me.Or...someone worse than I ever thought that myself could be.I started analysing myself these days.This what happens when you're stuck at home and letting yourself doing nothing.Damn it.I mean,well,according to my friends and MYSELF,fine.It's true.I think I was a way lot nicer way back then.Atleast that's what we think.But Aya said it is a 'good bad thing'.The hell does that mean.But oh well.I don't think it's 100% my fault.Im growing up and will always be influenced by my surroundings.Well,talking about my friends.How some of them are way in front of me when it comes to sex and all.I can't even recall the worst thing that I had done with my ex,while they all have gone through everything.

Life couldn't be more boring since SPM's over.Look at me.All I could do is desperately trying to find myself some good quality anime and new fresh songs.Sound more like a therapy to me.To cure everything I guess.Starts from the pain to the boredom.It's weird really.How last few weeks,I see myself to a loss.Im losing friends as time passes by.I do get it.That time always take our precious.But then,now they're all coming back.Naturally I mean.We're acting cool and all that.As if everything's doing fine,and the best thing about it is...maybe..everything's really doing fine.How we shove away all our childish thoughts and stupid acts.How we just continue walking together.
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Wednesday, December 6, 2006

Tastes like chocolate.
Well,yesterday was pretty tiring and fun.We went out and had fun I guess.Haven't done that for around 6 months.lol.We watched 'happy feet' since the other movies were boring.so yeah,we decided to watch that one.We also went shopping and yay!I bought a skirt and a new pair of jeans.Pretty satisfied with it.tee-hee.The skirt is nice.I have always wanted to buy it but didn't feel right to buy it before spm.Hehe.It got line of buttons on d front and it's in black.It's just super neat and smart.Yes,spm is over.and so is school.but Im feeling fine.Content with my life.Lol.Although it has just been 2 days since d exam is over.Thought that I would feel 'hoo-ray' and all that.But no.It feels perfectly normal and no such thing as totally 'freedom'.Maybe because I didn't do so well for d papers.I don't know.But i dare saying that I did my best.Yes,I may ended up screwing em but I swear I did my best.So,all I gotta do is wait and pray hard.Well,Alia is currently in Macca doing haji.Im missing her.Hope she's doing alright there.Alia,we're so gonna hang out after u got back here ok!?Love ya!
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Thursday, November 16, 2006

   Argh.
Yes.I do realise that this is not what Im supposed to do right now.I am supposed to study right now.Next week is spm.but I cant.I don't know why Im so moody today.No,not exactly with people.but with the books!I felt sleepy this afternoon.I felt lazy.and the songs from the radio were killing me!!!!This is so stressful.I just realised that I am not only stress because I study,but it's also because there are just times where I cant study!Probably det's d exact reason why im online rite now.there are just so many things that Im scared of.Oh yea,my lil bro got his upsr's result today.At first he told us dte he only got 2a's for it.He actually made me had a heart attack for awhile.BUt no.he was just cracking us up with his 'funny' joke.he actually got 4a's.he got a b for his bm.well,hopefully,I cant return back to my normal self after this.ja.
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Sunday, November 5, 2006

Highschool.
Alright.fine.dammit.I turned on the radio and suddenly the graduation song came out.I didn't cry but felt kinda sad.Yeah,it's true.Highschool's almost over.Goodbye to dramas,fun and yeah.You know.Highschool stuff.Can't believe when I think about it back,there were so many good moments that I spent with my classmates and friends.Sigh.Ok.da hell is wrong with me??lol.no no.I have to stop being emo...at this very right moment.haha.After this,everyone's going to colleges.doing matrix,a-level and others.It's sad that we're actually going on with our own path after this.Some of my friends are leaving to overseas by dec and early next year.That is why,after spm,Im sure as hell gonna spend my days with my friends.Damn.I love my school.After for so long denying it,lol.I cant take it anymore.I love my school like hell!I love my school!!!Huwaaaaaa!I love my class.I love the bloody corridor,where every morning I pretended that I didn't care about any of those kids.Im sure gonna miss that 'this way to hell' stair.Im gonna miss the disgusting canteen.Im gonna miss the teachers.Im gonna miss my seat..ok.Im gonna miss everything.Even those little things that I hate about highschool.





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Friday, October 20, 2006

Can't believe I have a halo above my head after all.
I have a lot of things on my mind now.I've decided to take a-level on july.yes.probably I'll be one year behind than u guys.But i don't give a damn anymore.as long as im happy with my life,there's nothing to chase in such hurry.it's weird.I think i've been isolated myself these days from the 'world'.lol.whatever does that mean.have you ever thought that there is a better side of you when u're facing something that u've always wanna run away from?well,i have.erm..yeah.sorry.but i am a little proud of this little discovery about myself.not saying im an angel,but now i get it when they say,if you really care about someone,all u wanted is to see that person happy.yup.i think i have all d answers in my hand right now.for all this time,i've been spinning my head a lot,trying to figure the best way.n yes.pain is pain.but im very happy rite now.infact,i've been truly honest and clear to myself and friends.it's sad really det highschool's almost over.but i dun wanna brag about it too much.im pretty much excited about college.well,despite all d stress im going thru rite now.i gotta score.really.i need to score.so bad.
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Friday, August 18, 2006

   subject.
Ah,well.I cut my own fringe last sunday i think.some of my friends think it was weird,and some of them think it look good on me.^____^V I am currently doing fine.Despite struggling for my trial.Since I am planning to go to a private college next year,yeah.Trial is very important.But,I dunno whether I can score or not T_T I havent finished studying all the syllybus.gyah~Hope Im gonna do well for my exammmm >_<
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Friday, August 4, 2006

Eveyrbody,scream your heart out.
i39xcn7r380 tb4yrvhf u0rg8n5r0itkopaeirpokjodpmgipim0-ir0ig0....!!!!!!!!!!translation->Im stressed. T_T
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Sunday, July 30, 2006

   Nothing to be addicted with
I am currently non addicted to anything.Except for bleach and school rumble.Other than that,either I'll go daydreaming about johnny depp on my bed,or study.Err...now that I stated all that,I guess I am still addicted to certain things.But I think those things are healthy enough for me to shove away other disturbing things.I am very scared of the upcoming SPM trial.If I screwed up *AGAIN* this time,Im going to do my plan B for SPM.Which that plan B has always been my plan A.Nothing else except study. T_T Im gonna lock myself from my favourite things,huh,including eating my favourite dish.Gyah~I really don't see how that plan is going to work out T_T .Frankly,I am very surprised...er..that it's almost august.And I am still playing around! >_< I ahven't been shopping for quite awhile.My friends and I don't see how we can actually hang out anymore until the SPM is over.We keep thinking about our future plan these days.What we're going to do in our lives and all.That's good right? ^-^ It's hard to find good teenagers like us these days.lol.We are very ambitious.Well,considering we're nerds.LOL.Ajin always think that she is.But I don't mind really if that's what people want to think about me.Because personally,I love for what I am.It's weird how I turn out to be worse and worse day after day.I keep praying to God that everything will turn out to be ok.
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Monday, July 10, 2006

Lovers and haters
Hoo-ray!we did soooo well last saturday!we totally nailed it!everyone did a good job at selling.lots of people came to buy d food and drink.im so happy!we never really expected that it would be so successful,so we didn't really prepare a lot of stuff.but thanks to my friends and of course my big bro,who've been killing his time waiting and driving us to places,sankyu minna-san!=)it was such a valueable experience for me.By the way,im so sad that france lost.sigh.alrite,gotta go to take a bath and study again.lalala~
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