The following is an uplifting tune about paratrooping, it is a song sung to the tune of "Glory, Glory, Halleluja"
SQUEEMISH WARNING
THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS GRAPHIC WORDS
Blood Upon The Risers
He was just a rookie trooper and he surely shook with fright
He checked all his equipment and made sure his pack was tight
He had to sit and listen to those awful engines roar,
And he ain't gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
“Is everybody happy?” cried the Sergeant looking up
Our hero feebly answered “yes” and then they stood him up
He leaped right out into the blast his static line unhooked
And he ain't gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
He counted long, he counted loud, he waited for the shock
He felt the wind, he felt the clouds, he felt the awful drop
He jerked his cord, the silk spilled out and wrapped around his legs
And he ain’t gonna jump no more.
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
The risers wrapped around his neck, connectors cracked his dome
The lines were snarled and tied in knots around his skinny bones
The canopy became his shroud, he hurtled to the ground
And he ain't gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
The days he'd lived and loved and laughed kept running through his mind
He thought about the girl back home, the one he'd left behind
He thought about the medics and wondered what they'd find
And he ain't gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
The ambulance was on the spot the jeeps were running wild
The medics jumped and screamed with glee, they rolled their sleeves and smiled
For it had been a week or more since last a chute had failed
And he ain't gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
He hit the ground, the sound was splat, his blood went splurting high
His comrades were then heard to say, “A helluva way to die”
He lay there rolling ‘round in the welter of his gore
And he ain’t gonna jump no more.
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
There was blood upon the risers, there were brains upon the chute
Intestines were a-dangling from this paratrooper’s suit
They picked him up, still in his chute and poured him from his boots
And he ain’t gonna jump no more
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
Gory, gory, what a helluva way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
HUMOR PORTAL
I think we all see why he's scared...
This is why cats don't like getting wet...
How to keep beer cold in Northern Canada
The cows want you to Eat mor chikin...
And now for a corny joke...
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.
The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
Thoughts? |
RanDomnEsS