Thursday, November 11, 2004

Ooo. Pissy.
Ok, I've been awake all night. I glanced at the clock like every 10-20 minutes, ALL NIGHT. I wanted to drive to piano so bad today! Finally getting to drive alone! But NO. I had to have a bad night and I told Cim to cancel piano. I'm gonna have a hard time getting into the swing at school today.
As for the boyfriend thing, haha, I read DeathT-2's comment. I wouldn't go out with Seto just cause he's an asshole among asses [don't take that offensively, you can't tell me you don't think he's a complete jerk]. But since he'll never materialize in this plane of reality... Might not bother to wait for him. I don't see how people fall in love. I just don't. Even anime characters don't really appeal to me... Guess I'm just super cold. Hah, in that Darkside of the Zodiac book I'm gonna buy I read up about Aquarius with Pisces Rising and all it said was "Cold fish." Hahah. All it says in there about Aquarius is how much of a self-centered, heartless jerk Aquarius is and it says how they're really loners and all that jazz. I was like huh. Guess it's not so unusual for me to always being going solo. That might not be happening for long though. I'm thinking about trying the whole boyfriend thing just to be opened-minded. Just for the experience, just to be able to identify a little more with others. How can you counsel someone if you can't even identify with them? Sure, you can counsel, but it really helps a lot more if you know what it is they're talking about, right? But I don't know. Dating is pointless when you're not planning to get married. While I still very much want my own children [adopted, obviously] I don't want to be so attached to be vulnerable to anyone [I've always had this extreme defense machenism, I don't know why] so staying away is just to keep me safe.
Well, I must be going. I've started coughing as if I have bronchitis again. Egh.. I never get a break...

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