Friday, January 7, 2005

Uhm... hm.
Yeah so, missing 2 days was a big mistake. I missed so much stuff. I had like 60+ problems to do in math, I still have to finish some from Wednesday over the weekend on top of what we got assigned for the weekend. I have to study Chemistry like hell cause the guidence counsellor doesn't want to transfer me out yet. He said to wait another week. I feel like this is gonna be impossible but I'm gonna try. I had a 45 minute tutoring session after school today with Mr. Ryan. I think I understand, if not, I can ask on Monday. There's a test Wednesday so I gotta get this down before then unless I want my first grade in the class to be a failing one. x__x Gah ! I can't say I'm not trying though. Luckily, math and Chemistry are the only classes I fell behind in. Math I caught up pretty quick 'cept for making up the homework. Chemistry there wasn't any homework, I just didn't understand what they were doing, which is probabley worse. ^^; I'm working hard, I really am.
There isn't anything else going on. I was shocked to hear the other day, though, Ben and Hannah exchange a "I love you" just before they left school. O_o They've been going out like 3 months ? Moving kind of fast... no? ....^^;; Tch. Uhm. I really don't see how people can love each other as much as some people say they can. I mean, call me cold or whatever but, I don't think I ever could. =/ Sad to say, it makes me kind of sad to say cause who knows what one could be missing out if they can't ever experience it ? Or maybe... no. Maybe it just takes the right person. Maybe .. hm. I don't know. I wish I could have a chance at it, just one shot, just to know what the big hoohaw is all about. ~_~ I feel stupid for admitting it but, once I saw Ben all ... Mr. Happy rather than Mr. Grumpy, it was like the apocolypse, so there must be something worth while about it ... <=/ I don't think I'll ever know though. While some people will seek self-pity when saying 'oohh no one will ever love me [cry]' I say it because I don't understand it period, right? And if I can't stand living with me, how can I expect someone else to ? Especially when nobody's ever liked me, or liked me and been able to come and tell me to my face. It is kind of discouraging, specially when all you hear about at school is "ohh, so and so told so and so that he/she liked her/him!" Then the only other thing you hear is, "Oh my God! So and so slept with so and so!" Yes Catherine does that to me. Why do I care if one of her friends slept with someone? >>;; I don't mean to be a jerk but seriously, that's something very personal if you ask me. I wouldn't go marching around the school and say "I slept with him!!" o_O I mean really. People have no pride, no dignity.. people are stupid. ^^; Hah. I don't like being mean but really, come on.
If I had anything interesting to say I'd actually say something but.. this whole post was pointless and a waste of time [not that I have anything better to do with my time]. Man.. now I'm depressed. I'm bad about these mood swings. [sigh]

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