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Wednesday, August 3, 2005


And when it's all clear on what to do... BAM!
I don't get it... I'm hurting so much. Richard told me last night that his dad is acting very unsure in me coming over. On top of that, I had a hard conversation with Evelyn. After being with her for 5 years, it makes it hard to just leave her behind like that. I'm still holding old grudges on her for things she's done in the past and recently, I've done no better. I just can't feel that spark anymore, and I also suspect I'm full-on gay. I just hate that I've been hurting her so much. After I had finally made up my mind and gotten on the track to going to Europe, all this is thrown in my face and it tears me apart. I am so lost right now, I don't know where to go...
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