Monday, September 24, 2007

sadness
i dunno wat to say today other than im down and want it all to go away the pain the hurt all of it gone meditation isnt helping and people are afraid of me because they see me fall to my knees and scream in anger and pain the hhospital finally released me and told me to take some advil or motrin or some crap like that just like i thought my boss isnt letting me work so i quit and to top it all off im stuck in a rut im stuck between love and lust the love of my old master and the lust over a goth emo chick that is really good looking and really smart and she is wanting to go out with me i told her that id have to think bout it but i dunno it wont work out so i think ill just tell her that it be best for her to move on and explain why enjoy the new poem and plz comment on both the post and the poem

holding

holding you in my arms i feel great love and joy but when you told me it was over that was when i couldnt remmeber who i was why is it everytime were around each other i wind up holding you in my arms and feel the love and joy but when you tell me to let go it all dies there havent you seen that holding you is the only thing i have that is keeping me sane in this world havent you seen the pain you caused me no i guess not other wise you wouldnt tease me that way i guess ill just have to say goodbye to a 38 but id rather say goodbye and i love you to you aaah the pain it has come again im on the ground on my knees while you walk away from me then i close my eyes and open them to see you standing there trying to help me im confused if you hate me why do still show affection towards me if you love me why dont you just tell me inside im hurting worse than before it seems that my burdens have grown and have become more now for i caint talk to any one or let any one help me with them for i know they have their own burdens just like me and you we both have burdens that we carry but refuse to help each other carry them i guess we feel that they are ours to bear and nobody elses iknow thats how i feel well the time has come for to go as i slowly walk away from you you see me pull something out of my jacket im at least ten feet away now and your still watching when you see me out it to my head you realize wat ive just did as you see the gun fly through the air and my body land on ground that is soft as air and you run screaming towards my ifeless body and you rememeber wat i said goodbye my love i shall be watching after you as i gave you a soft gentle kiss...
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