what a friday the thirteenth.....
last night, i had a terrible dream....nightmare....that's been happening way too much...
i was in class, and my teacher was telling us about some ancient ruins that were just discovered outside our town. for homework, we were supposed to go to the ruins and study them, filling out this big packet of paperwork. since i can't drive, i had to find a friend to drive me. another girl, a freshman who talks, non-stop, came too. for some reason, we took my mom's van, and i sat in the very back (i never sit there) while the guy drove and the girl sat up front talking with him. when we got to the ruins, i got out and was really dissapointed, the so called "ruins" looked like they couldn't have been built more than two weeks ago. it was like a big covered pavilion thing. the pillars were perfectly round and there was fresh cement. i went back into the car, rather put out, because i was excited to see something old to study. i was doing my paperwork, and the girl got in the backseat with me, and kept talking and talking. i kept asking her to stop, that i needed to finish my work, but she wouldn't stop talking about nothing. i put my work down in my lap, and watched the "ruins" go by (they were really long) after a second, i looked up to say something to the driver guy, but he wasn't there. nobody was driveing. the car started going faster and faster. somehow, i couldn't get up to the front seat, only the girl could. i started asking her to go and stop the car, because we were starting to go really fast towards a hill. the girl just laughed and said it didn't matter, then countinued babbleing on and on. the car was going too fast now. i was really scared then, and kept begging the girl to go and stop the car, but she always said it didn't matter. the car went up the little hill, and jumped off the other side onto the busy freeway. there were so many semi-trucks, and they were going too fast to stop. they barely missed us, some haveing to swerve so hard that they fell over. by then i was crying, trying to get the laughing, jokeing girl to stop the car before it was too late....but i was afraid it was already too late. the freeway ended, and there was another hill on the other side. we flew off that hill like it was a ramp, the car was going so fast. the hill stopped at it's top, dropped off into a cliff. looking down, i was trying to figure out how i could place myself in the car so that i would get least hurt, then gave up, the cliff was way too high for anyone to live through falling. the girl was still talking cheerfully, laughing, not careing. the car finally hit the bottom, and i blacked out. i woke up and saw the girl, perfectly fine, walking without a care through the feild that we landed in. looking down at myself, i saw myself bleeding everywhere, so many cuts and wounds. at the same time i was looking down at my self, i could see myself sitting in the wreck, a bloody mess. i blacked out again. everthing was still black, but i heard sirens, and slowly opened my eyes again, blinking back the blood dripping down my face. the lights were flashing from the emergency veicles. the resuce team, along with alot of my friends, both close and distant, and my brother were circled around me in the crushed car. they were all standing still, stareing at my with....such uncareing looks, indifference. no body would help me, and i could feel myself dieing. my brother was the only one makeing any noise, he was laughing coldly at me. i couldn't talk, i was too hurt to ask for help. nobody cared.
i woke up in my bed, under all my blankets (that are really really warm) and was shivering alot. i was really cold all over, and i was crying.
when i went to the bathroom, i couldn't look in the mirror....i was afraid. when i went to school i hugged one of my friends, and was trying hard not to cry. i know it was dumb, but i asked if i were hurt and was dieing, if they would just stand there, or if they would help me....i had to ask.
that dream felt so real...it still does
hey, i'm sorry i posted so long...>.< i just had to post that...maybe all these nightmares i've been haveing have reason, a cause. maybe i have to find that reason to make them stop.
i can hardly sleep anymore, in one class we had to track peoples sleep, and i averaged 4 hours a night for the past two weeks. -.-,,
well, saturday i have an all day hunter safety class, for my archery lessons. i think it's from 7 am to 6 pm >.< way too long, if you ask me. straight from there, i'm going to have to go to a dance. that will end at 11 pm, and i'll get home after midnight >.< maybe i'll be so tired i won't have any re-occouring nightmares.....
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