And I can't get out. NAd It's ruining everything because it's all I can talk about, and I chase people away with it because it haunts me, and troubles my heart, and...I just don't kow what to do. I promised myself so many times that I wouldn't speak of it anymore, that it won't bother my heart, that i can forget about him, but it won't go away, and I'm sick of it. It's like this ferris wheel of pain that keeps circling my heart, and I can't get rid of him in my mind.
I wanted to do this finally. Just talk to him. Just make it go away. If I could just tal kto him, maybe it will all be better. I don't have much left to lose, but i don't know if my heart can take more pain from this. It's already been through too much.
All I know is that I can't let it go on like this. Not if I want to continue with my life.
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