Tuesday, October 10, 2006

*kills self*
Holy Mother of God! I am sooooo sorry for not being on the past few days! I've been playing Oblivion, and let me tell you, that game is addictive as hell X__x

You know what my mom said about Xbox live? She said she might get it to make me more social, lol!

Hey, I'm not complainin' XD

Er...yeah. I have a ton of homework to do that I missed on Friday X__x

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!



















TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently
born foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again."

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,
OKAY!"

(Horny little bitch, ain't she? XD)
Comments (9) | Permalink

Friday, October 6, 2006

*pokes*
Hiyas! I started playing Oblivion last night, but...it's not as good as it used to be. That's probably because I already did TONS of things on it when my cousin lived here. I used to play it all the time X__x

I make my history teacher laugh. I think he thinks I'm amusing, 'kuz I'm so random and obscene in his class...lol! He's really stern and rather boring, but...well...he laughs at me...yeah. God, that sounds weird O__O

I cleaned out my turtle's old tank today and put Pipkin in it. It's 2 times bigger than her original tank, so I'm sure she'll enjoy it X3

I also signed up for the Art of Otaku thingy majigger. It sounds like uber fun X3

Eeek! Here's the colored version of Milkycat's tradey! Go comment and vote or I'll cut off your nipples and force you to eat them, okay? ^____^

Milkycat's awesomely awesome colored artsy fartsy tradey wadey

I luffs it *giggles*

Random pics of DOOOOM!!!









Very, very interesting...











TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Joke)

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.
His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell His mother what he wanted. "Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."


Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker.

He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Leroy’s mother
asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy, of course, thought he did.

Leroy’s mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the last year and write a letter to God and tell him why he deserved a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.


LETTER 1:

Dear God:

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Leroy


Leroy knew this wasn’t true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started over.


LETTER 2:

Dear God:

This is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you, Leroy


Leroy knew this wasn’t true either. He tore up the letter and started
again.


LETTER 3:

Dear God:

I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday. Leroy

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either, so he wrote another letter.


LETTER 4:

Dear God:

I know I haven’t been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy


Leroy knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike. By now, Leroy was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church. Leroy’s mother thought her plan had worked because Leroy looked very sad. "Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said.

Leroy walked down the street to the church and up to the altar.
He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Leroy began to write his letter to God.


LETTER 5:

I GOT YOUR MAMA.

IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.

Signed, YOU KNOW WHO

Comments (10) | Permalink

Thursday, October 5, 2006

*Squeaks*
I got out of school early to go shopping today! X3 I got some cool undies, socks, some cute little chaincuff earrings, a wallet, some fucking PILLOWS! 'kuz, y'know, my old ones were (literally) antiques and therefore flat. X__X I also goooot some new combat boots 'kuz my old ones were dead, and a computer chair! YESSSS! My old one was old and the back was completely off, so all that was there was a metal rod sticking up that tried to bring me back pains many times. Ohs! I also got an Xbox 360 and Oblivion. Yessum.

OMFGAAAWD! Many thanks to Milkycat who did an art trade featuring Ebony! (popular little bastard, ain't he?) Go comment and vote on it or I'll cut open your stomach and suffocate you with your own intestines, okay? ^__^

Milkycat's awesomely awesome artsy tradey

No homework! Well, I did have an essay to do, but I already slayed that bastard, heh.

One artsy is up! 'Tis Hatchet's art trade 83

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!





LMAO!!!!



I want a trash can like that...lol!











TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Pickup line comeback)

Him: So what do you do for a living?
Her: Female impersonator.

Comments (8) | Permalink

Wednesday, October 4, 2006

Tralalalaaa...mweehee.

Gah! My turtle be gone. Me and mummy-kins took him to the pet store, along with my cousin's ALBINO hedgehog. I begged my mom to let me keep him, but nooooo. Bitch.

Then again, she's taking me shopping tomorrow. She be nice, lol! X3

I be a mooch....yessum.

*squeaks* Many thanks to sikaurai for doing an artsy trade of Ebberz! *glomps* I wub you X3

And all of you other people...go comment and vote on it or I'll kidnap you, chain you up in my secret room and rape you, okay? ^__^

sikaura's awesomely awesome tradey wadey

Oh, nu! Nu random pics doom! The world hasth ended X__x

Actually, I'm too lazy. Go look up pics yourself XD

I have....tons of homework to do, so nyet.

TTFN, babes.

P.S. Morte killed and raped the P.S.'s corpse. Deal with it.

Comments (8) | Permalink

Tuesday, October 3, 2006

*kills you*
I was gonna stay after school today to have my math teacher explain equations step by step, but that never happened...I forgot to call my mom before school got out and ask her if I could X__x

So I might hafta do that tomorrow X3

Many thanks to Hatchet who drew Ebberz for an artsy trade! Go look, comment, and vote or I'll beat you, okay? ^__^

Hatchet's awesomely awesome tradey wadey

I had to pee at LEAST 10 times today in school! It was HORRIBLE! Mummy-kins said I might have diabetes, which would suck...no more Mountain Sugar (Mountain Dew) for me...;__;

One pic is also up, so...yessum. X3

Random pics of DOOOOOOOOOM!!!!















Typical pussy-whipped married man...lol XD

No homework! SCORE!

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Quote)

If you are one of the 98% who haven't smoked weed, good for you. Go fuck yourself you self promoting, pompous virgin.

Comments (10) | Permalink

Monday, October 2, 2006

*snarls*
Gah! Muh back hurts...I lifted lots of things today, lots and lots...damn yard work X__x

3 new artsies should be up later. Yessum.

Oh! And many thanks to Suzaku12 who didesth an artsy trade of Ebony! Lookat it and comment and vote and stuffs or I'll kill you, okay?

Suzaku12's awesomely awesome tradey wadey

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!















I'm off to do homework...*dead*

TTFN, babes.

P.S. Life is like a dick: when it gets hard, fuck it.

Comments (7) | Permalink

Sunday, October 1, 2006

Rawr.
New month = new theme. (Thanks Milkycat, for giving me his name. I always liked his art style, but I never could figure out his name to look up more artsies of his on the net)

Welp, one artsy should be up later. 'Tis Demon Goddess's art trade, yessum.

That naughty pic is also featured on my photobucket account: albino_yaoi

If you wanna see, go search for it yourself you pervs XD

Did a bunch of outside work today...and I have more to do tomorrow...*kills self*

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!



















TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Ahahahaaaa, this one amused me XD)

Seems God was just about done creating the universe, but he had two things left in his bag of creations, so he decided to split them between Adam and Eve. He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the ability to stand up while urinating.

"It’s a very handy thing" God told the couple, "and I was wondering if either one of you wanted that abilty."

Adam jumped up and blurted "Oh, give that to me! I’d love to be able to do that. It seems the sort of thing a man would do. Please give me that ability. It’d be so great. When I’m working in the garden or naming the animals, I could just stand there and let fly. It’d be sooo cool. I could write my name in the sand. Please, God, let it be me you give the gift to, let me stand to pee, oh please."

Eve just smiled and said that if Adam really wanted that so bad that he should have it. It seemed to be the sort of thing that would make Adam really happy, and she didn’t mind if Adam were the one to get this ability. Adam was happy, and proceeded to wash down the bark of the nearest tree, laughing with glee all the while.

"Fine", God said, looking back into his bag of leftovers. "What’s left here?" "Oh, yes. Multiple orgasms."

Comments (7) | Permalink

Saturday, September 30, 2006

*Squeak*
The monthly visitor has rudely plopped himself upon my lap, demanding to make my life utterly miserable with horrid, agonizing cramps.

Damn him.

My turtle needs to go away! He needs to like...go to a pet store or something. I dun want him anymore, he's a pain in the ass and he bites. DX

I want that new, special edition Advent Children...yes...want...need...*fangirl rampage*

Still workin' on art trades and stuff...*sigh*

Random pics of DOOOOOOOM!!!!





There's some creativity behind that sign XD













That be a frisky man, yo XD







TTFN, babes.

P.S.

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
"It's very uncomfortable at first", says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.
"What do you mean?" asks the first man.
"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."

Comments (9) | Permalink

Friday, September 29, 2006

And they'll be singin'
Squee, took tests and quizzes in each and every one of my classes today. 'Tis sucked, yo.

'M almost done with that naughty pic...I can't do anything with it at school ('kuz it's naughty, of course) so I was able to sketch out an art trade (not sayin' who's! Teehee...I be devious)

That damn vocab test was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be...X__x

Random pics of DOOOOOOOOM!!!!





















Here's some pretty naughty ones, so click the links at your own risk, kiddies!

Woman's Water Bottle

Whoa, Piggy!

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Courtesy of lovelife7, thankies! *huggle glomp, love love* X3)

One day Billy goes up to his mom and says, Mommmy, what's a penis?"

" Go ask your father..." Mom replies.

So Billy goes off to the livingroom, where Dad is watching the football game with Uncle Melvin and few of their friends.
" Daddy, What's a penis?" Dad rudely interupts, " Not now son, I'm watching the game."

Uncle Melvin picks up and says,
" Come with me Billy, I'll show you what a penis is.."

Uncle Melvin walks Billy up to his room and drops his pants and whips it out and says, " Ya see here, Billy, This Here Is A Prefect Penis!"

So the next day, Billy returns to school. recess starts and Billy says to his friends, " Hey, You wanna see a Perfect Penis?"

His friends reply, " sure..."

Bily escorts his friends to the bathroom and drops his pants and whips it out and says, " Ya See This Here, If It Were Two Inches Shorter, It Would Be A Perfect Penis!!!"

Comments (9) | Permalink

Thursday, September 28, 2006

'Sup.

I have a vocab test tomorrow, and it's not easy. By "not easy" I mean it's not multiple choice. He gives you the words, and you have to write down what they mean.

Fucker.

My turtle needs to die or something 'kuz I don't wanna clean his tank out again...lol.

Fed Pipkin yesterday...at first she came after my fingers X__X

I'm in the process of coloring the naughty pic for a friend, and I (somehow) was able to get half of Milkycat's trade done at school...so maybe I'll be able to do more at school than at home, lol >83

Well...hm.

RANDOM PICS OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!





















TTFN, babes.

P.S.

2 friends were camping out one night, when all of the sudden one of them jumps up screaming,
"A SNAKE JUST BIT ME ON THE TIP OF MY PENIS!!".
The other friend said, "don't worry, I am going to town to find a doctor, I will be right back!".
So he goes to town, and finally finds a doctor.
"Doctor!! My friend just got bit by a snake!!!" the friend says.
"It's ok", the doctor says, "all you have to do is suck the poison out.".
The friend says thank you, and runs back to the camp site. The injured friends asks, "WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY? WHAT DID HE SAY?"
,the other friend replies, "doctor said you gonna die!"

Comments (10) | Permalink