Monday, August 27, 2007

yes eddie is still with us. god i hate him. my mom is still and bitch. god i hate her. eddie said when he gets paid he's leaving. god i wish that where true. i had planned to leave when i graduated high school. but now, as soon as i turn 18, im gonna get an apartment and finish the school year from there. and my mom can stick that in her juice box and suck it. this is gonna be a lonely year for me. and a hard one. im a freshman you kno. one without a computer. it blew. and mom isnt gonna get a new one. cause she spent all the money she just got(which was a lot) on a dumb idea of eddies. a pool barn. god i HATE him. i wish. i dunno wat i wish. i would wish he'd die. but thats too mean. even for him. i think. you kno he accused my mom of stealing something of his. they got into a huge fight about it. thats when he said he;d leave. and the next day, my mom found it on the fride, exactly where eddie left it. you kno, he is a bastard from hell. and thats the worst kind. cant wait till im 18. cant wait till i have friends. u ppl dont count. cause there is no one who comes to my site. even my best friend though, she hurts me too, but doesnt kno it. she still wont. even if she read this post. which she wont. cause no one comes to me site. not even my best friend. u wanna kno something i just remembered? probably not right? well to bad. im telling ya anyway. i just rememebered, that a while ago, my best friend hurt me. really bad. and she doesnt kno it. couldnt tell. couldnt see. i thought best friends were supposed to see the hidden pain. well anyway. she had been in this place for a day or two. and she had been complaining that she hated it. and her other friend was there too. and u wanna kno the worst thing she couldve said. wat she did say. she said, to that other friend, not me, not both of us, she said i wish u couldve been there with me. and that hurt so bad. im supposed to be her best friend. i dont mind sharing her. i dont care if she has 2,3,4, or even 10 best friends. i just wanted her to say that to me. or even both of us. but it hurt me when she said that and it hurt me even more when she didnt notice me about to cry. u kno who u r my bestest friend. ur supposed to see my pain. not the pain i tell u about. all of it. even the things u do. i kno I'M not perfect either. i kno i get on ur nerves a lot. is that why u pick ur other friend over me? cause if so tell me. and i'll stop being annoying. cause u hurt me. and if u do it cause i did something to u. tell me. and i wont do it anymore. im sorry for watever i did. i am. so anyway. if u read this, which u wont, dont cry ok. just call me. my home number my cell number. anything. but dont cry ok. i dont want u to cry cause then im hurting u like u hurt me. and dont worry i kno u didnt do it on purpose. i have to go though. and sorry ppl who i have been making read this who dont really care. not that there r any ppl out there on my site

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