Saturday, January 17, 2009

i don't know if i've ever been good enough.
01. What are your nicknames?
Jenny, Jenniez, Jen. eh. Someone used to call me J.Z but he's long gone now.

02. How do you style your hair?
it's called the I look like shit style. lol.

03. What's new in your life right now?
being able to exsist around her and being able to actually breath. yet i'm still so attached.

04. How many colors are you wearing now?
a shit load. this is the one shirt i have that has a shit load of colors.

05. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
depends on who's around me.

06. What was the last book you read?
To Kill A Mocking Bird.

07. Do you nap a lot?
No. I don't remember the last time I took a nap. My days are already to short as it is. I love sleep but it's a waste of time.

08. If the person you secretly like is already taken, what would you do?
I wouldnt stop anything i'm doing besides, even if she wasn't taken, which she isn't, she wouldn't want me. We've already determined that, and i'm growing to except that.
kind of.
not really.
but whatever.

09. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Not really
I've actually been pretty happy lately.
but i dreamed about my dad last night and it makes me feel weird...
i guess i miss him.

10. What's your favorite dessert?
uhm...CHEESE CAKE PLZ.

11. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
Mmmm. 45 minutes if i really care.

12. What websites do you visit daily?
Myspace, Facebook, Myotaku, Blogger,

13. Do you write fic? What was the last fic you wrote?
Lol.....

14. Do you like to clean?
Yesss.

15. What's the last song that got stuck in your head?
Push. By Matchbox 20

16. What's the last movie you saw?
I watched Signs last night. Then Lost Boys but fell asleep during.

17. Would you enter a relationship with your ideal partner, even if you knew he/she was seriously involved with/married to someone else and would never leave them?
Lol this reminds me of the crazy ryan story for some reason. Yes, I would. If she wanted me I'd do it because I'm selfish like that and want to know what i've been missing all along.
i'm so optimistic.

18. What is your least favorite thing to do that you have to do everyday?
Hmmm.... Homework probably? haha. I still need to do that essay....




lol, don't bother reading this. kthx.

give you no more power then what you already have.
breathing is becoming easier.
but that doesn't mean i'll stop holding on.
and if holding on is the key to giving in
then im all aboard to set flight
on a one way trip
to the back of my mind.
and if your falling in love
does that mean i'm falling apart?
because the scars on my wrists
they just really don't seem to exsist
when i'm not crying over you
i'm laughing over how pathetic my life is.
brought in the new year with a not so energetic bang
cuz' when i looked into your eyes
i saw exactly what i've always seen
nothing that lies hope for you and me.
i want i love you to mean something
to more then just me.
so carry on baby blues,
crimson red catches you so much better anyways.
and i'm hoping you're not hoping that forever is with you and him.
because i hate to be the bearer of bad news.
but i'm all over you.
just not so literally
barely holding on.
and i'm not willing enough to let my self believe your dead.
because desire burns deep inside you,
that's something i can't leave unsaid.
and i'm willing to be incoherent
if it means i make you think,
because once upon a time this all was really about you.
but once upon a time
is just the story of my life
because i've never really had my chance to give my self the time.
so forgive me when i'm broken
it's my current state of being
because belonging never felt so right
then when it's cradled in your arms.
get it? because i don't.
and i'm hoping she can't read me
because i'm trying so very hard.
his hands can snake up your body as much as they may like.
and i know just how desperate you and i are.
just not desperate enough to give into the one person
who would give you it all.
sheltered..
sheltered from me,
that's definatley what you need to be.
i claim it as my own
every once in a while.
land i've already roamed
in the back pictures of my mind.
so give it up for once,
cuz' maybe just maybe
i really do know it all.
and i'm not willing to be nice
if you're not willing to be my lie.
because my life has never been
such a self centered lie.
forever i've been building this up
and you tear me down like a meteor
straight to my core.
how protective i can be,
well i've already let the damage happen so i guess it's time i let you go.
you can fend for you own.
after all.
nothings better then a damaged soul.


time:11:43am
music:with me;sum 41
mood:headache :/
Comments (4)