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myOtaku.com
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AIM
• InnocentDemon8
E-mail
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• europa_nymph
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Birthday
• 1987-08-06
Gender
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Female
Location
• The city of lost angels..a,k.a. Los Angeles
Member Since
• 2004-06-26
Occupation
• singer/ writer/ student/vampire/old age goth/witch
Real Name
• Amber but you can call me Fae-Fae
Personal
Achievements
• Choir Awards, Singing Awards, Poetry Awards...too many to list, Honor Roll my whole life
Anime Fan Since
• well...since eighth grade but my newfound friends in p.e. got me more into it
Favorite Anime
• Inuyasha, Cowboy Bebop, Witch Hunter Robin, Chobits, Yuyu Hakasho, Tenchi Muyo, Ruroini Kenshin...i know i spelled some of those wrong
Goals
• to become a singer, study in Italy, find my true vampire love...already attained, to master my craft of magic
Hobbies
• singing, being different, daydreaming, writing, dieing, bleeding from sel-inflicted wounds, crying, hurting, mentally breaking down, hating, loving everything but myself, ridiculing myself, drinking blood, casting spells, and learning about Wicca
Talents
• singing, writing,...i think that is it
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myOtaku.com: Fae Tsukiakira
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Friday, December 17, 2004
this heart shall beat no more...
tick...tock...tick...tock...my heart anticipates yet my mind reveals downfall...more drama has fallen into my lap...the band...*sigh*...no longer does it exist...it has fallen into the flames...so i say farewell to that dream...in any case as i have mentioned previously i have encountered and am currently in an "online" romance...i am to meet him in person tomorrow...where will this take us...???...will this work out...???...dear mona these frustrations are welling up and cascading from my mind...i have spoken to his friends and brother...he has spoken to my mother...all appears well...he is a godsend so to say...quite the beauty...and a complete romantic...we see things in such a similar mannner...it seems as if our souls were meant to unite...we appear as yin and yang...a perfect balance...he stands for light...i stand for darkness...he is a christian...i am a Wiccaan...our ruling planets...his is the moon...and mine is the sun...we are most definitely different beings yet so much alike in many ways...i just pray that this religious break does not cause him any frustration...he knows of what i am and what represent and appears to be attracted to it...he is not attempting to bring me into something i am unwilling to enter...we shall see where these waves carry our boat...i do pray it is carried safely across to a paradise island...
So yes...I am dancing on down into the jaws of destruction...i feel as if my writing is taking a plunge down...every time i begin something i hit a mental block...the concrete wall just stretches out and looms before me preventing me from ever reaching completion...well i am now on my three week break...perhaps it shall provide me with inspiration and time to clear my mind...a current unfinished poem i am working on goes as this...
Whispering voices of love
Buried within the shadowey heart
Bleeding rose within the dove
The adrenaline soon to start
Through the sea of souls
The two sights begin to meet
Parting and shedding the black holes
The two enveloped within a letter of heat
The downpour of frustration
The shatter of insecurities
The decision of destruction
Broken shards releasing screaming pleas
Sacred angel won't you save me
Crucify my broken heart
Paths of a clouded discovery
Desire for thies dream to never part
When reality clashes with mirage
May conjoined hearts remain untouched
and that is all i have thus far...so far how does it sound...???...
I am sorry my loves...it appears as if i have abandoned all of you...i have missed you all terribly...please do not forget that i still continuously hold you all near my heart...i shall never forget you...you are all on my mind and i am constantly wondering how each of you are handling your lives...but i have returned for now...i should not be leaving any time soon i do not thing...who knows...we shall see...i love you all terribly...!!!
my friend michael has returned...i should be overjoyed yet i find i am not...he is the one who showed me the beauty in darkness...my vampiric friend if you will...but he contains emotions and desiresof me...none of which i can fullfill...*sigh*...i do not like this feeling...also a friend of school has been showring me with affection and riddling me with compliments...aye...as sweet as they both may be...i could love neither as they love me...and yet again my dog of an ex has returned to my side...i swear i must be his drug...but i will not let him swallow this pill anymore...i push him away and he does not understand...he tackles me down and tries kissing me and i demand he stop but it is not sinking into his mind...*large sigh*...perhaps someday he will understand that he broke me into many pieces and he will never be able to repair our broken love
no pictures or anything today...i do not feel so creative...Farewell all...
~The Innocent Demon~
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