Birthday • 1991-01-14 Gender •
Female Location • In your head Member Since • 2004-06-09 Occupation • Musician Real Name • Faroe
Personal
Achievements • So many things Anime Fan Since • FOREVER!!!!! Favorite Anime • i love almost every type of anime Goals • Becomeing the greatest drummer in the world Hobbies • Video Games, Music, Anime Talents • music, writing, voice acting
myOtaku.com: Faroe
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Wake Me Up Inside
Well, today is a good day. I woke up this morning all by myself so I was able to relax and take a nice hot shower and eat some breakfast and take my meds. I got ready for my pre-employment paperwork/interview with Publix. It was nice because I got to walk there in the nice weather. I love October however, it doesn't feel like October. I don't even have a pumpkin to carve! I wish I had one...... I know that sounds dumb but I just wanted to have a normal Halloween..... I figured the only reason why I wasn't having a normal October is because I don't have any money to spend. I only have like $1.00 in my bank account and well, that is basically broke.
Now, that I am home, I am working on getting employment verifications from Wal-Mart and Publix and either today or tomorrow, I will go to the school to to fax verification of my school records and attendance. I'm trying for cash and food assistance so I can have food and extra cash for my living needs. Ugh!!!! Wal-mart is making this so difficult!!!!! Grrrr..... I will figure it out soon. I'm probably going to call the govt. and tell them I am having difficulties. They say in the letter to contact them if I am having trouble. This sucks. Or I may just go to an office somewhere and ask for help.
I think I will ask Israel is we can after work. He works till two and it's only 12:00 p.m. So, I think we should have time to get there and back. Israel and I talked again. I think I scared him because I told him I was not happy with him or the way he was treating me. He listened to me but tried to fight back at first and I snapped right back. I think things are good now. But if this happens again, I may actually leave. But then.... I really will be all alone. I don't like that feeling very much. I wish I had a good girlfriend around here that I could fall back on when things get tough..... I guess I am a loner after all. heh.
I have so much things to update you guys with! lol I went to the doctors office yesterday and I spoke with him. I explained to him that the bleeding inside was bad and he was a little shocked. My immune system is becoming tolerant to the immune suppressors and the Asacol HD so he upped the dosage and that sucks cause one of the meds in in enema form and it hurts. It gets right into the tissue and stops the spasms of my intestines. ugh it hurts. I'm afraid one day they will take my large intestines out and I will have to have a colostomy bag..... eeeeew!!!!! But the good thing is that I don't need another colonoscopy. That would be a big burden on my time. He did prescribe me some antibiotics to help kill any infections that may be causing this flare up to get worse. I need to go pick it up at the pharmacy now. I gotta big list of things to do.
So I found the perfect Halloween costume!!!!
Isn't it so cute!?!?!?!?! I love it! It made me happy to see it for some reason. lol Oh and this is the song for today of how I am feeling. lol
Yup. That is really how I feel today. I just want to be myself and not bend and change myself for others. I don't care if I have to leave everything behind: Israel, my family, my job anything, I will not change for anything or anyone. I do however want to grow up and learn when the time comes. I feel like I have learned a whole lot about myself and my future. It just took that one push of getting away from my mother. I know she hates me now but one day, when I have my career as a Virologist and I have money I will help her out and get her a nice home and take care of her and TJ and my sister. ^_^ Even if they wont take it I will still write them a check. I don't care what I need to do I just want to give back to them. Even if my mom wasn't so great to me. I still love her.
Well, I am gonna get going now. Gonna make some chili for myself. Well, for Israel and Kyle but I'm gonna make some first while they are away so I can get more than just one bowl. They eat a lot!!!!
I hope you all are taking good care of yourselves and thank you for all the support you have given me. You guys are really the best. ^_^ I love you!!!!!
