Monday, May 21, 2007

A poem..by me
i'm not an alien nor invisible
than why do you treat me like a freaking dog
all you said was wrong
i couldnt be more hurt
but i've realized that its only your nature
tell your friends i'm crazy
it's just waste of time
cause as long as you think about this
i'm still on your mind.

i'm angry and scared
shakey and unneverved
lost in some awkward translation
that never really occured
i sit there shaking
doubting all my thoughts
watching you ignore me
watching you hate me
i'm no friend nor enemy
i'm only lost in a reverie.

i cant be fooled nor can i be convinced
of your intentions
i held onto you
like some stupid girl
i held on so long it makes me wanna hurl
i should have learned my lesson
boys are a waste of time
he taught me that
for he was never mine
you werent either
but just tell me why
all those countless times you made me cry.

"Only Your Nature"-Ashaliegh, May 21, 2007
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Saturday, May 19, 2007

and the meak shall inherit the earth
Now that i'm single i find myself spending alot of time alone in my room thinking about to many things. i felt so broken, so lost. it was random and left wing. it was out of the blue. terrible. excrutiating. especially when he tries to use a tactic so you'll break up with him so he wont feel bad. and all that time i kept thinking about what i had done wrong and how could i fix it. but there was nothing i could do but sit and watch as my perfect world shattered before my eyes. this last week will be so hard. i wish that i had never done anything in the first place but sit and admire some one i could have but never truly confront them with my feelings. but life must go on right? but i just wanna know why. there was no reason. no explanation for me and my crippled heart. only pain and tears that i was left to cry alone at night and think more about why. my heart is still vaguely shattered. i leave it up to god because i cant think striaght any more. its up to him to try and fix this broken heart. i just hope he has enough glue. i just wish he would still try to be my friend instead of treating me like an alien. that is what kills me the most.


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Wednesday, May 16, 2007

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Saturday, May 12, 2007

When it all falls apart
Not much to say. Life sucks.
2 more weeks of school. I
dont care anymore. I cant
care anymore. Why am i an
open book while people
refuse to let me in?
Screw it. From now on my
life is my life and no one
has to know about it except
my family. 9 days left of
school and counting.


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Thursday, May 3, 2007

If only, if only...
It's a thursday, what can I say?
Now that James totally has his dreams
put together it inspires me to be the one thing that i've dreamed of...A voice actress.
It's just too damn bad that it'll never
come true. There are too many hoops to jump through in that industry and my parents think
that my aspiration is ludicrous. and not
like the rapper. Well maybe someday
I can try...i highly doubt it.
Until next time...maybe i wont be emo...

"These violent delights have violent
ends and in thier triumph die, like
fire and powder, which as they kiss,
consume."
Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene VI
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Monday, April 30, 2007

My, how a great day can spiral into disaster
Well today started out great. James and i hung out and he got to see me dance a little..i was totally showing off but hey i'm allowed to for my bf. He is one amazing kisser! It's too bad i'm a distraction from his school work...but he said his test was easy so yeah! Then dance came...I have a good friend in that class named abby. When i got to class she was upset and usaully i am the one to comfort her because after all she and i are tight. But instead she takes her new favorite friends and tells them whats the matter and tells me to leave! so then i leave and in the dance we are doing some REALLY provacative moves and i dont want to do it! i feel like i should be using a pole or something! and everytime i say something about it the little preps in my group ignore me!!!! so by now i'm just fuming...and then abby tries to talk to me and tell me that her little lackies were just there and so she decided to tell them.
Well whatever. tomorrow is a new day!..ugg chem.


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Thursday, April 26, 2007

sooo true...very sad

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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Well...ello puppet...lol
hello my wonderful fans! Today was pretty good...i had all boring classes today: English, Chem, and Euro. And i just found out that i'm performing in tomorrows assembly! and with a dance i totally forgot from a long time ago! well i guess it'll be a good time for improve!
And this weekend is my party!!!!!!!!!!!!So excited!!!
well ttfn!~Ashlaliegh

"Shine your light down on me. Lift me up so i can see. Shine your light when your gone. Give me the strength to carry on. To carry on."~Robbie Robinson "shine your light"
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Monday, April 23, 2007

   blah
nothing to say....

"If I could write I'd say all the words for you. To follow you. Till you wonder. Tell your secrets in solitude. I've had to let go to so much. It's hard to breathe now. For love is pulling me in where I go this time. Don't think I'm coming back. I took your ring that never comes off. I put it on. Sorry to lose you. Sorry to keep it after you were gone. Nothing is small. nothing is lost. I want more then where i go this time. Don't think i'm coming back."~Sam Phillips
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