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Saturday, January 15, 2005
k... so now what?
hmm... what has happened since my last post? well i guess we took the second part of the elas on thursday *starts muttering profanities involving ny state* but the whole writing-of-the-essays was easier than the multiple choice/ listening section. i dunno. friday went by so fast. tsuki wasn't there cause she wasn't feeling well. this whole week everyone was like sick or half-dead. something's going around, i guess. at lunchtime ambi-chan was CONVINCED that my nickel was, indeed, a dime, even though i only had five cents to my name. it was really funny, but i guess you had to be one of us to think it was. i can picture us at some school reunion thirty years from now. 'it was a dime. i swear it was.' 'you're out of you're friggin mind,' and so on. after school played ddr for a while, then ate pizza bagels (wouldn't you know it, they taste pretty darn good w/o cheese! and i'm NOT being sarcastic!!) until like 6:15. i felt like a piece of crap when i got home cause of my parents. 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything,' and so i decided not to speak for a while. i wanted to tell them that i loved them. i would never do anything to make them upset on purpose. but i was hurt, and refused to speak. i went up to my mom and my dad and started signing to them, 'i love you'. they got annoyed because it wasn't like my vocal cords were damaged. plus before mom had said 'if you can't say anything nice' etc. they assumed i was signing something mean about them. plus, my dad could make out the 'you', so they assumed that since i was siging 'f**k you, f**k you,' cause i kept signing it over and over. i got annoyed and left the room. i had to resist the temptation to flip them off, saying 'understand THAT? DO YOU GET THIS LANGUAGE?!?!' but thank god for the world i have at least a little self-control. i came back and tried again. eventually it came to a point where i had to break down and talk. i made the sign for the letter i, choking on my tears. 'i', i sobbed. 'l'. 'o'. 'v'. 'e'. 'y'. 'o'. 'u'... i left the room again. my mom chased after me and hugged me. she went to kiss my head, and i went, 'WAIT! a dog kinda slobbered on my head earlier,' and she was like, 'oh, so THAT'S why your hair smells so bad,' and we both burst out laughing. even around 7:30-8:00 i went over nicole's house to hang out. jenna was there too. i ended up sleeping over cause, well, it just happened. i mean it wasn't planned or anything. we stayed up playing 'the sims 2' and watching t.v. woke up around 8:00 (well at least me and jenna) and woke nicole up with our talking. we saw 'fat albert' with tsuki, not a movie i'd generally go see. i guess i was the only one who didn't really like it. not my taste, let's put it. but i went anyway, and now i'm here. i'm trying to make a new avatar, but it's ticking me off. these are the results of a test that i had taken to see if i had any personality disorders. i am truly dissatisfied with my outcome. i mean, i was hoping (er, i mean, expecting) to get every single disorder dangerously high. however, my perfect world where i am a mentally insane whack-job has been shattered... wahhh...
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