Sunday, November 6, 2005

   Ranma and Kurigame Orange Road Crossover Story

Anime Apocrypha Productions (tm)

Presents

<<>> Side Story

``A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN?''

PART I: A Laugh and a Sigh and a Dream of You

[A redheaded girl sits at her desk, writing in her diary. Her room -- it's a
college dormroom -- is jumbled, without being messy. On one wall is a vintage
movie poster of Lon Chaney in "Man With a Thousand Faces." Next to it hangs a
pair of ceramic masks, one a harlequin's comic grimace, the other a tragic
frown. The bed behind her is unmade, the pink satin coverlet tossed at its feet
and the sheets snarled. Above the bed is a framed picture. The redhead looks up
from her writing to glance at it. It's a portrait of a girl, with long raven
hair and huge sapphire eyes, rendered in watercolors. It's signed -- FOR MY
FRIEND, AKANE.]

Akane: Ayukawa...

[She turns back to her diary and continues to write.]

Akane: It's the autumn of my 18th year. I've been at classes now for three
weeks. University is tough, but fun, too. Last weekend Madoka, Kyosuke,
and I went to Heian Mountain together.

[Akane picks up a snapshot from a pile on her desk and holds it to the light.
It's a picture of Kyosuke and Madoka sitting on a bridge railing; Madoka is
holding two fingers up in the "V" salute. The picture glows and shivers, and
suddenly, the figures within the snapshot begin to move...]

FLASHBACK:

Akane: (aiming her camera at the pair) Another picture! This time, closer
together.

Kyosuke: (rubbing the back of his head) Hai!

[He moves to put his arm around Madoka, loses his grip on the railing and
begins to fall backward.]

Kyosuke: (waving his arms wildly) Aaaaa!

Madoka: Kyosuke!

Akane: (snapping the picture) Smile!

END OF FLASHBACK:

[Akane flips to the next photograph, which shows Madoka reaching out in
consternation as Kyosuke's legs flip upwards.... and he falls off the bridge.]

Akane: (pulling down one eye and sticking out her tongue) Nehh! Clumsy Kyosuke!

Akane: My cousin is lucky to have a girl like Ayukawa to look after him.

[Akane pauses, sucking on the tip of her pencil]

Akane: (continuing to write) And yes, I think she's lucky also.

Akane: It's been nice getting to know Madoka as a friend, although sometimes I
wonder... I wonder if she could have been something else. A sister? A...
ah. No, not a sister. She's everything I wish I could be; strong,
resourceful, smart, beautiful...

Akane: ...everything I could want.

Akane: Lucky Kyo-kun.

[Akane blushes and turns the page quickly.]

Akane: I'm studying performing arts, my teacher says I have a natural gift.

[Akane laughs.]

Akane: Yesterday, we practiced dialogues -- the "balcony scene" from Romeo and
Juliet. My partner was Yoshi Kawakubo: the other girls say he's the
cutest boy in class. I don't know. He wears black turtlenecks,
horn-rimmed glasses... and, I think, makeup.

[Akane pushes back her chair and stands, putting one foot up on the seat.
Holding her right hand out dramatically, she says...]

Akane: Yoshi, Yoshi, wherefore art thou Yoshi?...

[more dramatically now, leaping up onto the chair]

Akane: Unsex me now!... I always liked Macbeth better than Romeo and Juliet.

[She sits down on the backrest of the chair, her feet on the seat, her chin in
her hands.]

Akane: If all the boys in the theater department are like Yoshi... Get thee to
a nunnery, Akane!

[Akane laughs, and the backrest chooses this moment to snap audibly.

A shocked expression on her face, Akane flips backward -- in exactly the same
pose as her cousin in the snapshot -- and smashes her head against the wall,
right underneath the portrait of Madoka. She falls heavily to the bed, her arms
flung outward, and the ceramic masks tumble from their hooks, to land next to
her, manic grin, mournful frown....

The world goes black.]

END OF PART I, A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

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Anime Apocrypha Productions (tm)

Presents

<<>> Side Story

``A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN?''

PART II: Alley-oops...! Who Takes the Cake?

[It's a beautiful day. The birds are singing, the sun is shining, there's not a
cloud in sight. A peaceful day.

Suddenly, a red-haired girl leaps down from a rooftop and into a garbage can,
quickly grabbing and replacing the lid on top of her. Peering over the edge of
the roof and down into the alley, a cute girl with short black hair shouts...]

Girl: RANMA NO BAKA!

[The lid rises, teetering on the head of the red-headed girl, who's obviously
nearly as furious as the black-haired one.]

Ranma-chan: Go away, you uncute girl! I'm not going to let you experiment on
me!

Girl: Who's experimenting? I followed a recipe!

Ranma-chan: Ah, so desuka! What kind of recipe for cake uses AMMONIA?

[The girl on the roof brings a plate into view, with an extremely dubious-
looking pastry on it. It's green, with purple shards of... of SOMETHING
sticking out of it.]

Girl: Ammonia... ? Did I grab the wrong bottle?

Ranma-chan: (sticking out her tongue) Yaah! Leave the apron for feminine girls,
and stick to wearing your judo gi!

Girl: Why, you... you IDIOT!

[jumps off of roof and lands feet first on lid of garbage can. Since it's
sitting on Ranma-chan's head, she's smashed flat.

Girl: I put my heart into this cake!

Ranma-chan: (sounding fractured, from inside the can) Kawaikune... it's
everything ELSE you put into it that worries me!

Girl: (leaping up and down on the lid) Aaaa! You'll eat this and like it!

[A loud explosion, followed by an immense cloud of dust and broken mortar,
heralds the arrival of -- someone -- through the far wall of the alley. The
girl jumps off the garbage can to avoid the flying brick. The air clears to
reveal... Ryouga Hibiki.]

Ryouga: (shifts his backpack onto one shoulder and leans against the near alley
wall) I will eat it, Akane-chan. If you made it, it must be delicious.

[Ryouga covertly crumples a wrapper in his free hand, marked "TANAKA'S
UNIVERSAL TOXIN ANTIDOTE," and slips it quietly into the garbage can.]

Akane: (staring at the cake, now also frosted with bits of rubble and brick
powder] Ryouga-kun...

Ranma-chan: (popping up from the garbage can, wrapper in hand) Ryouga! Why,
you...

[Everybody looks up. A whistling sound above -- something is dropping from the
sky. By the size of the shadow, it's about the size of a man. In fact, it IS a
man, leaping down from the rooftop.]

Man: Tendou Akane, I must eat the cake prepared by your hands!

[It's Kunou Tatewaki. Who else? He too lands on Ranma-chan's garbage can lid,
knocking her senseless. Again. Akane stares left and right at the two would-be
cake-eaters, both of whom are now in combat position.]

Kunou: (rushes across the alley, sword raised) DIE, fool who makes claim to
Akane-chan's baked goods! Kunou Tatewaki will have his just desserts!

Ryouga: !

[Ryouga quickly draws his umbrella, crouches, blocks a flurry of blows from
above, and then performs a leg sweep, which flips Kunou-sempai into a wall.
Head first, of course.]

Kunou: (sitting up) That did not hurt, Ryouga Hibiki.

Ryouga: (furious) If that didn't, this CAN!

[he grabs the garbage can -- with Ranma-chan in it -- and raises it over his
head.]

Akane: No, Ryouga!

Ranma-chan: (popping the lid off the can) Bwaaa!

[she leaps in front of Ryouga to try to stop him from smashing the can against
the wall -- and Kunou -- which, incidentally, would also smash Ranma....

Too late. Ryouga has already released the can, his eyes boggling as the can
heads straight for Akane. Akane is clocked by the can, and goes flying against
the wall; the can smashes Kunou into the side of the building, and bounces
back... turns... and starts rolling down the gentle slope of the alley, toward
the nearby intersection.]

Ryouga: (speechless) ....

Kunou: (feebly) Osage no onna...

Ranma-chan: (distant, through the din of traffic and crunching metal) AK...
aiee... AKANEEEE!

[Akane herself is slumped in the alley, blacked out. Ryouga rushes to her side
and grabs her hand.]

Ryouga: (tears streaming down his cheeks) N-nooo! Forgive me, Akane...

END OF PART II, A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

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Anime Apocrypha Productions (tm)

Presents

<<>> Side Story

A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

PART III: I Know I Am, But Who Am I?

[A silhouette spirals downward through a long, dimly lit tunnel, shrouded with
mist and oddly clumped swirls of light. The only sound is a faint echo, which
comes not from above but somehow from all directions...]

Echo: Forgive me, Akane... forgive me, Akane... orgive me, Akane... give me...
Akane...

[Akane Tendou awakes in mid-fall to see a shadow rushing toward her, a shifting
mass without definition or form. Screaming silently, she hits the cloud -- and
passes through it, into blackness once more.

When she opens her eyes again, she's on a soft, springy surface -- a
Western-style bed, from the feel of it -- and her head is ringing like a gong.]

Akane: (thinking) Ryouga must have brought me to Tofu-sensei's clinic. It's all
that idiot Ranma's fault! If only he'd eaten his cake like a man.

[she shifts her hand to rub her throbbing head, and realizes there's something
in it. She brings it up to her face and opens her eyes.]

Akane: Byaaa!

[It's a grotesque mask, ghost-white, lips turned up in a fiendish grin.]

Akane: Whose idea of a joke is this?

[suddenly, Akane realizes that she feels... different. She looks down at
herself. Who changed her clothes? She's suddenly wearing denim pants and a
white tee-shirt... Clothes? How about her body! Thinner and taller than she
remembered, but perhaps it was just the bump on her head skewing her brain.
And--]

Akane: WHERE AM I?

[Akane rushes around the small room, nearly tripping over the broken chair on
the floor. She looks at the wall -- at the poster, the picture -- nothing
registers. She runs to the closet and opens it up. Shirts, long pants, jackets
-- no skirts or dresses at all . It could almost be a boy's room, except that
in the wardrobe-dresser is a full underwear drawer...

Akane pulls out a bra and looks at it, peering at the label, then blushes.
It's, um, somewhat larger than her size.

She throws it down in panic.]

Akane: Was I kidnapped? Where are Ryouga and Ranma or... or even
Kunou-sempai?.... Oh, the door!

[She rushes to the door and tries the doorknob. It's unlocked. But Akane
doesn't open it, because on the back of the door is... a mirror.]

Akane: (looking at her reflection in shock) That-- that's not me!

[She reaches up to her hair, an auburn-red crop where once was an ebony bob.
Her face is thinner, more angular, on a leaner body.

Luckily, Akane isn't a complete stranger to shape-changing -- after all, in
Rumiko Prefecture bizarre transformation is a way of life...]

Akane: (to herself) Think, Akane! What could have happened?

[pacing in front of the mirror, she ticks off the possibilities one by one]

Akane: One: Shampoo! Did she use some kind of... of spell or potion on me?

[she considers it. No. Whatever else this body was, it was attractive -- though
kind of tomboyish -- and what's wrong with that, she thought, correcting
herself defiantly. Regardless, though, Shampoo would be far more likely to turn
her into some kind of slug , if she could. Heck, Akane wouldn't put it past
that feline female to turn her into a mouse and gobble her up...

Back to counting.]

Akane: Two: A stranger! Someone ELSE -- someone with a grudge against Ranma,
probably -- transformed me. But who, then? And... [looking at her
surroundings] this doesn't look like a typical villain's lair. It's not
like I haven't seen enough of them...

Akane: Three...

[...Akane thinks about someone else who occasionally transforms into a red-
haired girl...]

Akane: Ju-Jusenkyou water! Is... is Ranma's curse CONTAGIOUS?

[Akane thrusts her hands against her head and grits her teeth...

There's a knock at the door, startling her from her analysis]

Voice: Akane?

Akane: (stunned) H-hai? (thinking) Who is this?

[The voice is high and bubbly in a nervous sort of way.]

Voice: It's time for class! You were certainly loud last night -- what were you
doing, shouting and hammering at the wall like that? Then again, it's
better than the snoring you usually do -- can I come in?

Akane: Um, yes. (grabbing a leg of the broken chair and holding it behind her
back) Come in.

[In comes a pretty, shortish girl with brown, curly hair and wire-rimmed
glasses. She's wearing a rather prim skirt and a heavy crew-neck sweater, which
serves to hide most of her torso in a shapeless mass. She's very cute, but she
almost seems like she doesn't WANT to be. Oh, yes -- she's also holding a
sticky bun and a cup of tea.]

Girl: I've been down to the dining hall, so I brought you some breakfast --

[Akane drops her makeshift club, grabs the cup of tea, and pours it over her
own head. The girl's eyes bug out like ping-pong balls, and she edges back,
holding the sticky-bun like a crucifix.]

Girl: Oh. I can see you're not feeling well, Akane, so I'll just be skipping
along to class then...

[the girl steps backward out of the doorway and shuts the door ve-e-e-ry
quietly. Once the door is closed, her footsteps quicken to a sprint and
disappear into the distance.]

Akane: (puzzled) She KNEW me. As I am now, not as I was.

[Akane sits down on the bed, facing the desk, and notices next to her the two
masks. She sets them in her lap, one on each thigh, and then sees -- on the
desk -- the open diary. She sets aside the masks and kicks away the rubble of
the chair. And gets down to the business of reading about a stranger's life.]

END OF PART III: A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anime Apocrypha Productions (tm)

Presents

<<>> Side Story

A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

PART IV: Konyawa Hurricane!

[Closeup on a pair of hands wringing anxiously. The camera pulls back to reveal
Ryouga Hibiki, sitting on a chair between two beds in the clinic of Dr. Tofu.
On one bed, which has two mattresses and is propped up by a small mountain of
pillows, is the motionless body of Akane Tendou, with an egg-shaped lump on her
brow. She's not unconscious, though -- just sleeping, or at least that's what
you'd guess from the thunder-like snores her small body is emitting. Next to
her on the bedside table is a giant origami crane that seems to have been made
from flattened scrap metal.

Splayed spread-eagle on the bare springs of the other bed is the horrendously
bruised and contused body of Ranma-chan, also snoring -- gently. There are
tread marks across her forehead, and her clothing looks like it's been put
through a thresher. So, in fact, does she.]

Ryouga: (weeping a small fountain of tears) Akane-san, I will never forgive
myself....

[Closer inspection of the room reveals that one wall of the clinic has a
Ryouga-shaped hole in it. Apparently, Dr. Tofu is out and the door was locked.
Not much of a distraction to Ryouga. What's more amazing is that Ryouga found
the clinic on the first try -- guilt does that to you.

Ranma-chan stirs, and rubs her face blearily.]

Ranma-chan: (broken-sounding) D-did anyone get the license numbers of those
trucks... ?

[She looks around and sees Ryouga, and remembers what happened.]

Ranma-chan: (leaping at him with death in her eyes) RYOUGA!

[Ryouga doesn't stop crying or look up, merely holds up one fist at the level
of Ranma-chan's rapidly approaching head. Ranma smacks into it face-first and
rebounds onto Akane's bed.

Onto Akane.

Who grips Ranma-chan around the head and clutches her to her bosom.]

Ranma-chan: Yah! Leggo!

Akane: (snoring) Zzzzzzrauuu.... A-yu-kawa...

[the cabinets and shelves tinkle with the sonic vibration of the snore.
Ranma-chan wriggles in Akane's viselike grip.]

Ranma-chan: (covering her ears) .... Can't she even snore in a feminine
fashion... ? She sounds like a wild boar. Something she learned from
you, P-chan.

Ryouga: (bringing the hefty metal sculpture around and smashing it onto Ranma's
head] Who are you calling P-chan?

Akane: (blinking in the light) Ohh.

[As the sleeper wakes, Ranma-chan sits up, the sculpture miraculously balanced
upon her head. Ryouga leans over and grabs Akane's hand.]

Ryouga: Are you all right, Akane?

Akane: (her eyes darting around the room) Where am I? Who are you?

[Ryouga is much too close, and his red, tear-filled eyes, hysterical
expression, and pointed teeth are kind of spooky. Akane freaks out and gives
him an...

Akane slap!

Ryouga is smashed through the wall of the clinic, his arms outstretched and
fingers akimbo -- leaving a second Ryouga-shaped hole in Tofu-sensei's wall.]

Akane: (looking at her hand) Wow.

Ranma-chan: (balancing on the back of the chair Ryouga has suddenly vacated,
and casually unfolding the metal origami sculpture -- it turns out to be
Ranma's flattened garbage can) Well, I guess you've got your strength
back. Let's go home.

[She hops down from the seat and motions for Akane to follow her -- then,
awkwardly, thinks better of it and picks her up. Cradling her in her arms,
Ranma-chan leaps through one of the Ryouga-holes and out onto the street.]

Ranma-chan: (softly and hesitantly) ...I was worried.

[Akane, somewhat overcome by the dizzying whirl of recent events, and also the
dizzying effect of a near-concussion, is silent. But she looks up at the cute
red-headed girl who's cradling her like she's made of eggshells. She notices
the hint of a tear in the corner of one of the strange girl's big blue eyes;
she notices Ranma-chan's casual strength, as she leaps from rooftop to rooftop
and runs pell-mell across telephone wires while carrying her -- amazing!]

Akane: (to herself) Ka-kawaii...

END OF PART IV: A.K.A. AKANE-CHAN

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Comments, critique, even witty flames all appreciated... meanwhile, any
suggestions for where this might go, anybody? I'm feeling a little lost...
---
Jeff
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